I'm quite confused now.

[lavender514]

Hello friends again. I'm supposed to be doing work but I can't. I feel I need to make a decision now regarding what to do about my treatment.

I have been seeing this therapist for about 6 months. So far she is the only therapist I've seen that could diagnose me with OCD and do ERP with me. However I feel that progress is slow, lately I start to doubt if it is even helping. However I had some time to reflect last night, and after reading around I realised I have much work to do regarding my OCD. I realise I have to put in the work, but I have not been putting in much work. We have been trying to do exposure scripts, but the ones formulated during sessions don't seem to elicit much anxiety. So I wrote one on my own last night that really dug my worst fears, but I am afraid to read it out. I fear I will start to 'believe' the script or I can't handle the anxiety. I feel like I should review this script with my therapist first before trying to use it. But my next session is a week from now, I worry that I am wasting time now. I feel I need to act now and get better. But I worry if I use the script now I cannot handle it. I am afraid of making the wrong move. Or, I could call and try to see if I can bring forward my appmt. I don't know. There are so many choices that I could make I don't know what to do now I just want to recover and get better

[perez413]

Hello ! If this were me I would review half the script , or until you start feeling anxious . Take a break until you feel like you can start reading it again . I know it’s tough . I have OCD as well so you’re not alone especially if you’re writing down your worse fears , and I also think by writing it down and reading it outloud would make me “believe it “. The cycle of OCD is Terrible, debilitating to the point where you feel stuck . But yes I would read some of it to see how you feel , little by little . For example read the first few sentences and repeat it and then read the next few sentences etc .

[lavender514 in reply to perez413]

thank you I will try!

[deValentin]

Why not establish a hierarchy of exposures from the most challenging to the least? And then tackle them one by one starting with the easiest. You know yourself what you can handle. There is no need to go too fast. OCD treatment is a test of courage and patience. Patience and courage go hand in hand.

If the exercise is too easy, there is little chance to see progress. “To win without risk is to triumph without glory” (Corneille). If it's too difficult, you set yourself up for failure. I'm sure there is a happy medium somewhere. Personally, I'd choose an exposure for which there is a good chance, but no absolute guarantee, of success.

[lavender514]

thank you so much

[Sallyskins]

Progress is slow with OCD! Although some therapists would have you jump in off the high board with both feet, this can be so traumatizing that it sets you back.

Slow and steady beats OCD on the whole. But stretching yourself a little is necessary.

It sounds as though your therapist isn't stretching you enough. But don't make the mistake of stretching yourself too much before you're ready.

How about doing an exposure script that isn't so challenging? I appreciate that writing things down makes them feel real, although they aren't, but don't do stuff that you're not ready for.

I've found myself that Fabian tactics work best, Fabius having been an ancient Roman general who instead of attacking the enemy head on, wore the enemy down with skirmishes and small actions, in order to weaken it.

So attacking OCD piecemeal, where you can manage it - and stretching yourself just enough to make a difference - this is often the most effective way. And do talk to your therapist - perhaps ask her to stretch you a little more than she currently does.