is this ocd?

[Aants2023]

I’ve been doing erp and trying to tackle a particular core theme. I had a traumatic childhood and anything that reminds me of it causes great distress and has led to compulsions in the past. Things like seeing pictures of my hometown , or pictures of my abusive family on the internet.

I had a traumatic experience with an ex boyfriend, and now I feel the compulsion to look up his social media, in order to overcome the fear and ocd… but I’m not sure if this is a compulsion in itself? My ocd is telling me if I don’t look up his picture and do the exposure , then I’ll never get over the trauma or my ocd… do I need to do this to heal? Is this just a compulsion?

[Vasilijzgr]

That seems like a compulsion in my opinion. And what could bring you to relieve in long term will be:To intentionally look at the pictures that cause you distress without giving importance to bad thoughts and feelings.

Resist the urge to check his social media profiles.

[OCDlivrecovery]

hi there I would agree that it is also a compulsion that seems to might have a c+ptsd side due to the trauma you experienced. I have had similar compulsions in the past with an abuse ex that I would so distraught about that whole time period, I felt so many things that the ocd got the best of me. My childhood I also consider not great and never truly felt safe so when things trigger you it’s hard to not go right back to that “unsafe feeling”. In my opinion, desensitize yourself to seeing some key pictures but don’t over indulge or overthink it. You deserve to heal and grow, so be gentle with yourself like you are still a child