Hi allLooking for some advice on how to deal with my intrusive thoughts/OCD.
I’ve always had trouble with misophonia. Certain noises send me over the edge and I have to escape wherever I am that triggers this. Of late, it’s been my neighbours that are causing me to want to rip my brain out of my head just to stop the constant thoughts. They are horrible, a couple who live with their young kids but argue all the time, slam their front door and are just generally loud and horrible. I don’t get on with them and have had to have several confrontations about the shouting and abuse that comes from their flat. I’m now on constant high alert that they are going to start every time I’m at home. It’s so bad I’ve even bought noise repellant tape to put around my door as to attempt to block any potential noise from them. I have horrible thoughts of wanting to hurt her and feel like I can’t relax in my own home because I’m always obsessing about them. I can’t turn my thought process anywhere else no matter how hard I try and it’s literally eating me away. It’s gotten so bad that I don’t even like leaving my home unattended as I’ve convinced myself that they might try to burgle me when I’m not there. I watch out of the window to see when their cars are there and when they might be going out. It’s gotten so bad that I just want to pack and up and find somewhere else to live. I’m on constant red alert for the first sign of trouble from them. I lay in bed at night obsessing over it and it’s usually the first thing I think of when I wake up. I’m on Citalopram to help ease my anxiety but it’s not really doing much. Even when the noise is not every day I’m still obsessing about it.
I feel like a total freak even putting all this into a text and revealing what goes on inside my head. I was just wondering if anyone has a similar experience and how to help ease it if it’s even possible.
Thanks so much