CopingMechanisims: We've been told our... - More To Life

More To Life

1,335 members429 posts

CopingMechanisims

Katybetter profile image
3 Replies

We've been told our infertility is unexplained. I was wondering what coping mechanisms Other people used? I need to take more control of my feelings about this situation or I'm worried I will spiral.

Written by
Katybetter profile image
Katybetter
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
3 Replies
wendyWaz profile image
wendyWaz

Hi, I am abit saddened nobody has replied yet. This is my 1st reply so here goes.

I too have unexplained infertility, been through ivf and nothing. That was 7 years ago, I am afraid to say it takes time. You need to find a way to relax, I found writing a angry diary helps, esp if you can't talk to someone. Just let rip on paper, it makes you feel better and you can burn it after, which also helped!

If like me you hold tension in your shoulders, for me it caused me problems, go to an Osteopath. Start project me and repair yourself after all you have been through.

Take yourself out of situations if you need to, or avoid them till you are ready.

take lots of care of yourself xx

pm27 profile image
pm27

I'm not sure if you are considering or able to access treatment or if you've tried this already and it hasn't worked for you. There are other forums for people who are undergoing investigations or treatment, eg Fertility Network.

I found counselling helped me to understand the loss and grief of childlessness after we ceased treatment. It may be that you could access counselling support from your GP or clinic.

Different strategies work for different people so it might be you have to try ideas out to see if they work for you. You can probably get books from the library about cognitive behaviour therapy. Some people use mindfulness, colouring, keeping fit, engaging with hobbies etc.

slp303 profile image
slp303

I went to an NHS Stress and Anxiety workshop group last year and they suggested a lot of the strategies here:

cedar.exeter.ac.uk/media/un...

I found the idea of worry time useful: in the notes app on my phone as i go through IVF (or life generally at bad times) I try to put all my worries down in a list that are taking up my mind and then say 'ok, that's on the list. I will think about it later.' And then distract myself as best I can. Then, the next morning i spend time with my list, looking at my worries and spending a bit of time worrying over them. So many of them i cant change (unexplained infertility being one) and by looking at them in this disconnected way, it sort of helps me see them in a more rational way.

Try reading the pamphlet, it says it in a better way than me :) But when I feel that I am not sleeping well or I am ruminating too much this is something that keeps me from spiraling out (not all the time, but a woman can try :) )

Not what you're looking for?

You may also like...

Feel like the only one in the world going through this

Hi, I'm new to this forum. Have been trying to conceive unsuccessfully for four years. Underwent...

Insensitive hospital

Hi all Just wanted to share and see if anyone else has experienced this and any advice on how you...

Struggling

Hi everyone I've recently had a 4th ivf cycle fail and my husband and I have decided to cease...

Hanging on

Hi ladies, So I am wondering how many of you have had your job or career affected by infertility....

Im new here

Hi all. Im 41 years ol and trying to come to terms with the fact that I wont become a mum. My...