The Beast

[hannaho]

I call my depression "the Beast" and keep a diary noting my feelings most days. I feel much better over the past year and have been taking citalopram. I can't tell anyone how I feel they don't understand!

[Suzie40]

I don't tell anyone either x

[Hidden]

I find it so sad that you both feel no one can understand. I think it is incredibly hard to feel understood when in the past we have never felt understood, and at times I feel like you both, that no one understands, but I find they do. The problem is that they can't make things better, they can only understand, and although understanding does make things better it's a very long drawn out process and not something that brings immediate change. You say hannaho that you have been feeling better over the past year, do you put that all down to medication? It's hard to believe anything else can behelping when you feel depressed or that things are pointless, but perhaps there are times when you can find meaning in life, when you feel connected to other people, it's hard to remember those times when in the low times. I have similar experiences but like you I try to look back at the overall pattern and find I do feel much better than previously. Do try to share your worst feelings if you can, even if it's just on the website and not in person with someone, as sharing feelings really does change them although at times it doesn't feel as if anything has changed. I'll be thinking of you both and your beasts!

Suexx