Why does simple disappointment lead me to obsessing about the worst moments I've been through?

[JAFOman]

I ordered something a few months ago and it's been expect for the last week. Each day that it doesn't show I get disappointed and for some reason my mind takes that to mean it's free to dredge up the worst experience I've had recently. I've been working so hard to let it go, get over it and accept that it happened. Felt like I've made progress so why is it still coming back? Anyone else have something like this?

[Hidden]

I ordered some pyjamas about a month ago and nothing had arrived so my Wife phoned the company and they could not find the order, after She found the order number She phoned again and now they said they had run out of we had ordered, now we just have to wait, we have paid for them, so I suppose it will arrive when it arrives, it is not our fault, it is theirs so why blame yourself they are the ones with a problem not us. We put it down to the Cargo Vessel getting caught in the Suez Canal. So looking at it that way makes others look inefficient not us. We try and just be positive and keep our fingers crossed.Phone up or send an email to the company and see what has gone wrong. Be Philosophical about the whole thing Stop blaming yourself

BOB

[JAFOman in reply to Hidden]

It's not that it hasn't arrived, and I am in contact with the retailer that is handling it, it's how the disappointment opens up channel for everything else to come flooding back. How can something as simple and non life altering cause such pain to come up? They aren't even related issues.

[Hidden in reply to JAFOman]

I suppose you are making the problem personal and the company has not done anything to put this problem in a positive light. So you just remember negative problems you have had before that have gone wrong and for some uncertain reason you feel it can only happen to me so you blame yourself.You are looking at the problem, you are saying to yourself, Sods Law it can only happen to me. Remember it is generally caused by other people, they have no associated axe to grind Life is full of errors take them with a pinch of salt.

I can be in many ways look upon or down on others who make errors, now I consider they are not efficient in their work, why should that be your fault.

You are not a Walter Mittey live your life in a more positive light, and pass the buck to the person who made the error, not you

BOB

[JAFOman in reply to Hidden]

Sorry you don't seem to get that the item has nothing to do with it. It's a mountain bike and everyone is ordering them so I have to wait like everyone else. I only mentioned it as the reason for disappointment leading to the real problem and asking if a little thing causes other issues to come up for anyone else. Focusing on the wrong thing here

[Hidden in reply to JAFOman]

Consider anticipation rather than disappointment, why did you purchase the item ? They must be positive reasons and anticipations. Yes when things go wrong, like here there is nothing you can do, just wait consider those positive reasons, being to negative will make you feel anticipation has passed you by. Life is to short for that. Be practical and look forward to its arrival,, We both here look forward to getting parcels. In our case living in the countryside makes the post a bit of a problem so it is more of a surprise when the thing is there ready to open up. I never get sick of tearing the paper.

BOB

[JAFOman in reply to Hidden]

Again it's not about the item