Depression

[Warrensprings72]

I’m depressed and during my divorce after 21 yrs I realized that I have been depressed for several years. I’m contemplating suicide because my wife asked me to seek help several times but I didn’t listen. Currently I have lost everything - her, my house, job and she and my son are moving 1100 miles away shortly after Christmas. I am 46 and can’t find the motivation to move forward. I still love her more than anything and the reality of it is that I was given opportunity to fix my issues but failed resulting in this outcome. I don’t want to face life this way.

[Hidden]

If in the UK have you tried Relate, they can help if you go along together and discuss your problems

Have you talked to your GP, regards our situation ?

BOB

[Warrensprings72]

Im in American Ive talks with the GP here he believes medication is the answer. I’ve gotten worse since with the Meds.

[Stilltrying_ in reply to Warrensprings72]

They can take a while to work.

[AllieKitKat]

I recall a similar feeling when I divorced, for the second time. The feeling of failure was hard for me. I carried on because I was a mother and I had dependent children. I used to tell myself that once they were grown I could end it all. All the pain and suffering, I thought it would never end. People kept telling me it would pass that I’d find someone else. I haven’t found anyone yet and that was 10 years ago. He moved on more quickly within weeks and that hurt more. Despite my lack of a husband or partner I am happy and fulfilled. My youngest child will leave soon but the need to plan my ended finished years ago. I found it helpful to think what can I do about feeling bad rather than when will I stop feeling bad. I found something to be grateful for every day, even if it was getting out of bed or getting dressed. My daughter told me that I am not the same person I was before. Having experience such a great loss I learnt to deal with not only the small stuff but also the massive thing of loosing my mother 2 years ago. I want to leave you with hope. It took years to feel better but eventually I could function. Then when I learnt to function I learnt to cope, when I learnt to cope I gained confidence and learnt to laugh. I learnt to be happy in my new life.

[sweetiepye]

My harsh answer to you is this...when your wife was in discomfort it didn't matter to you. now that you are in discomfort you think something should be done. I think the only thing to do is admit to your selfish behavior and ask for forgiveness. May be if you are sincere she will have you back. You do have a son and a fair amount of time invested, two things in your favor. Pam