My daughter is 3 years and 6mths and I am worried about her development

[Raedeakin]

My little girl was born 9 weeks early and as lots of delays in sitting walking and speech and language delay. She had also had delay with toilet training. If anyone can give me advice on what help I can get to get s diagnosis and what funding I can get to help her stay in Main school she is still having a lot of test I am so worried about her thanks

[Charlie2750 Community friend]

Hi Raedeakin your little girl being born 9 weeks early means she has to catch up on her peers so will be delayed in some areas.When children do things or approach milestones is just an average time and most get there eventually and sometimes are earlier doing other things. Why do you want her to stay in mainstream school?If your little girl has learning disabilities she may fail a bit.A special school will not push for GCSE but will teach social skills and prep for life events. My son had those delays but now he can talk for England. A Consultant Pediatrician said once that Thomas would not row for Cambridge but he would certainly "row" for them If your daughter needs speech therapy and funding it should follow her through school after she has an assessment of needs. Embrace her as she is and don't worry.

[ao22 in reply to Charlie2750]

hi i am adult with speech delayed now my advice is celebratie each milestoon and encourage i also have a learning disabilities and 18p minus syndrome I have done alot of public speaking and at times thought i couldn't do it i turn 23 in but never give up your child will teach you alot more and you will see how bright she is good luck. I was meant to be due in nov but came in oct but i wouldnt changed me for the world

[Sarah_Mencap]

Hello Raedeakin

It must be very worrying for you, but Charlie2750 makes a very good point that milestones are just an average, and children often do things in their own time. Toilet training varies massively from child to child - it can seem like a huge issue but it may just be a matter of time (and a lot patience and many loads in the washing machine).

It sounds like you are following this up if she is having tests. Hopefully these will give you more information. Has your daughter's GP helped with these? Do you they know how worried you are?

Diagnosis can be very helpful as it is something definite and can make it easier to get support in the future. But you know your daughter best and you will be key to working out if she needs any extra support, either at school or at home.

Does your daughter to to any childcare at all? There may be people who can advise too.

Where I live there is a parent carer group. This can sound a bit daunting (people often don't like the term carer) but it might be a good place to meet other parents who are in a similar situation. They are also likely to know what is available near where you live.

If you would talk to someone about this our helpline has trained advisors. You can email [e-mail] or call them on 0808 808 1111

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Best wishes

Sarah