advice on how to help autistic young adult with aggressive behaviour towards her peers

[Oto3]

Can anyone give me an advice how to navigate to get help for our 25 yo daughter with aggressive behaviour? She has speech delay, slow information processing, low IQ, and autistic spectrum.

Thank you for our help.

[Jofisher]

there should be a behaviour team within the local health mental health services ask for a referral to them.

[Oto3 in reply to Jofisher]

Thank you for your advice. We are advised that GP won't give referral to a psycologist. Who else can make a referral to reach out to the local health mental services?

[Jofisher in reply to Oto3]

I would change G. P. Or challenge this decision you want to know why g p won’t refer then challenge. Is your daughter under anyone else that can support you as well ? If he lacks mental capacity you could get her an independent mental capacity advocate. Speak to the carers association to see if they can recommend anything or her social worker if she has one just a few ideas.

[Oto3 in reply to Jofisher]

Thank you for your advice. We have contacted the Adult Services.

[Jofisher in reply to Oto3]

I hope it helps you

[Oto3 in reply to Jofisher]

oh definitely. We were grateful there are people out there so helpful. Thank you

[Hidden]

thinkingautism.org.uk/aggre...

The above article allows you as a parent to circumnavigate the obstruction by your GPs somewhat inaccurate advice that they do not refer for psychological profiling of your daughters perceived behaviour presentations (aggression).

To make some rational sense of that WRONG claim it is necessary to make a distinction here.

So rather than explain the entire subset of ASB (Autistic Spectrum Behaviour) and break it down into its psychiatric and psychological parts (both address behavioural models) I could suggest taking an indirect route with your GP that MAY give you the ability to trigger a medical approach. If that medical approach were triggered then it would be possible to assess your daughter properly and discount a psychological approach and include other PERHAPS more nuanced and POSSIBLE relevant approaches that CAN arise out of assessment.

That is where this article will help.

The article is properly referenced at each narrative subset of the discussion and so perhaps you MAY want to simply begin by asking your daughters GP to test her blood glucose and cite the article.

NOT the main article but the subset claims that are on pale green backgrounds relative to the claim being made in the panel.

Those citations are linked to the research which they are citing.

SO the narrative content of the pale green panels' quotes often narrative claims to academic and clinical precepts representing the over arching dial of the research (in this instant ASB considerations) WHERE the citation source link in the panel gives the source.

SO cite the source link by following the link in a new tab in your browser and cite that source when asking for the glucose test NOT the main page as given in the url above.

That blood sampling for a simple glucose reading of your daughters blood sugar MAY predicate to an unavoidable furtherance of your request for a referral to a psychologist. BUT as I say - that is a presumptive direction to a psychological and behavioural profile grounded in generalised psychological behavioural precepts and MAY miss the psychiatric range of considerations that predicate to pharmaceutical interventions.

It IS possible to take a litigant route where you can cite various enactments in law and express a statutory consideration as to why you are making a reasonable request proportionate to your carer role in your daughters life.

Simply telling you that the GP doesn't make referrals to a psychologist is rather like the medical receptionist telling you that the GP is not a dentist when you ask for a referral to a community dentist. Its frankly insuting.

If you need more explanation then please do ask.

[Oto3 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for the very informative link. Very helpful. Many thanks.

[BenjiB]

Does she have a social worker? My son is 24 and we were referred by the social worker to the behaviour support team. He saw several professionals a psychiatrist, a behaviour specialist a LD nurse and a couple of others. The psychiatrist recommended a low dose of an anti psychotic medication and it made a world of difference almost immediately.

[Oto3 in reply to BenjiB]

Thank you BenjiB.

[ulrichburke]

Dear Oto3.

She might well have excellent reasons for her aggression - I'm on her side in this. I'm 55 with Asperger's, Cerebral Palsy and Hydrocephalus. All my life I've been beaten up, burgled, mugged and banned from places just because my disabilities make me look odd. Always by neurotypicals. Then if you stand up for yourself against them - you suddenly become the bad guy and they're the innocent - and THEY get believed b ecause the people they run to are neurotypicals TOO! It's a real no-win situation for us neurodivergent.

One thing I get from your message is that you want the mental health team in on this. You don't. Trust me. Learning disability is NOT the same as being mad. Just because we have difficulty expressing ourselves does NOT mean we need putting in institutions - they've been doing that to us for centuries, just so you lot don't have to look at us. When in doubt, ghettoize. Worked for Hitler with the Jews for awhile, didn't it, should work for learning disabled (hate that term, it's a pure neurotypical term - you prob. can't do science as well as Einstein so compared to him YOU'RE 'learning disabled') but it's a term you lot understand. To our detriment, but that's how you lot work anyway.

Don't try to get her put on liquid cosh, or locked away, LISTEN to her. I'd say she's trying to stand up for herself - though to understand the reasons WHY, you'd prob. have to look at it all from her viewpoint. So do that. Put your neuro-stereo-typical mindset aside and look at life the way SHE sees it. It might just be frustration for not being able to make other neurotypicals understand her. It might very well be she's feeling bullied - God knows I got beaten up often enough because of my disabilities - and nobody ever believed me, they thought I was self-harming and attention seeking. Which of course gave the bullies free rein - they knew they'd get away with it. So talk to her. She might well be defensive at first - that's fear, the first thing you neurotypicals teach us is to be scared of you. Think Mowgli - Raksha had to teach him to think like a wolf in order to fit in with the wolves. Let her be your Raksha to let you fit into her world enough to understand her reasons for doing what she does.

But don't, please, go down the mental health route. She's like the rest of us - her behaviour has a reason. Be her friend and confidante. Find out what the reason is. Remember it makes sense from HER viewpoint, if not yours, and you have to stand WITH her in this, not dope her up for your convenience, so she can't think or do anything any more but at least she's 'out of your hair'.

She's your daughter. Be her friend. One reason MIGHT be 'fox in henhouse' a fox will kill all the chickens because they're 'attacking' him from all directions and he's defending himself - we get like that in crowds/groups sometimes. Another MIGHT be neurotypicals refusing to understand her, sometimes for real, sometimes for teasing cos it's 'fun' for them. We can't always tell that, we just know we're not getting our point over and get frustrated. She's probably getting bullied and taunted mercilessly by one lot, so she assumes you're all like that and defends herself. Another one is joining in - I bet you lot Speak Down To Her from Mount Olympus like she's about 6 years old - people do that to me still, at 55, and it's ANNOYING BEYOND BELIEF!! (They've done that one to me all my life.) At 55 I've NEVER, not ONCE, been out with friends or 'dahn the pub' with mates. I've spent my whole life in solitary confinement because my disabilities make me look odd. And hated every moment of it. (Never HAD any friends - you neurotypicals have one overarching rule - if it looks odd, hit it hard.)

So let her be your guide. Listen. Understand. Work with her from her viewpoint. Draw a Venn diagram (Google it!) to link her world with yours and meet her in the middle. And keep the meds. locked in the cupboard, unopened. They help nobody. When they're gone, the prob's still there.

Yours respectfully

Chris.

[BenjiB in reply to ulrichburke]

That’s all well and good but some of us have children/young adults who cannot communicate and we can’t get to the bottom of why there is aggression. Your reply isn’t really helpful. You’ve described your own personal situation which won’t necessarily apply to others. After all everyone is different. Parents here are trying their hardest to advocate for their young people and get them the help they need. Being called “you neuro typicals” isn’t helpful at all and very patronising. I’ve been caring for and supporting my son for 24 years. I will not take advice from someone who A/ has never met him and B/ Gives “advice” in such an aggressive manner such as yours.

[Oto3 in reply to ulrichburke]

Thank you Chris for very encouraging comment. We know she is expressing herself in a wrong manner and she knows that too. many thanks for your comment.

[Hidden in reply to ulrichburke]

'One reason MIGHT be 'fox in henhouse' a fox will kill all the chickens because they're 'attacking' him from all directions and he's defending himself.'

A fox kills all the chickens in the Hen House because the Fox is a wild animal driven by base instinct and cannot do other than kill all the Hens in the Hen House.

In rather the same way a Venn Diagrammatical - and thus visual relationship between conceptual and applied relationships - is driven by making people commodities and cannot be applied to a single individual without a Hen House full of Hens to analyse.

So if the wild Fox kills them all and all we see is death, we may have simply missed who the Fox is and so missed that the nesting boxes are full of eggs for breakfast.

Philosophical? Perhaps!

Yet being more sensitive may simply mean identifying with the Rooster who could have sounded the alarm before time. Then the Rooster would have needed to know that the Fox was coming - and that is beyond the ability of the Rooster.

Just to make rationale

The Badger snaps the heads of every Rabbit in the warren before eating a single Rabbit. Yet the Rabbit does not attack the Badger nor represent any threat.

Neither the Hen to the Fox.

Sometimes it is far better to see the Fox and not excuse its ferocity and to see the Badger also.

In your expressions of your own experience in life (as described) - that may NOT be simply a case of seeing the disfigurement of others' minds (your neurotypical meaning) but it must surely mean that the neurodivergent (yourself in your expression) needs to present a case that does not include an implied dialectic to inflect an inferential justification for the Fox - rather PROVES the validity of taking your MIND into account when your underlying reasoning mind is entirely rationale.

Just my thoughts.

[Tracidu]

The challenging Behavior Foundation might be able to help you or stear you in the right direction , its worth a call , they have a website . My son can have challenging behaviour if he is unwell or something is upsetting him . Good luck , I hope you get her the support she needs . Its probably very hard for her too express herself

[Oto3 in reply to Tracidu]

Thank you. We have contacted them for the support and guidance.