So we are 8 days away from Ryan’s second Keytruda infusion. 6 days away from blood work that could take down the whole mission. I don’t know about anyone else.. but I get just the same amount of anxiety when it comes to blood work as I do a scan sometimes.. it could make or break a treatment. Ahh...
As far as Ryan and his condition currently, he’s trudging through. Stomach pain is pretty insane. (That’s where all of his cancer currently resides and needs to be evicted from) and when I say stomach, I mean abdomen. As far as we know the lesions are in his mesentary and one measurable lesion in his liver. Pain so unbearable he takes quite a bit of pain medicine, in turn causing extreme constipation. We tried everything OTC, and I mean everything to induce a bowel movement to no avail. After coming down with a pretty bad cough and congestion (the children that he is exposed to had it) and me taking him to the doctor involuntarily; we made sure he didn’t have bronchitis or pneumonia; and also got awesome “poop medicine” (excuse me I don’t know the name off the top of my head) but it sure has made him go. Thus relieving him of the stomach area pain for a few hours out of the day instead of 24 hours of uncut agony. At this point the amount of pain he is in from not being in a “regular schedule” or bowel movements it’s making his eating pattern terrible and frightening. He has fear of eating a meal because of the pain that is sure to follow. We have been supplementing with Ensure. And trying easy foods like bananas, mashed potatoes, rice. Just to get anything in him. There is a lot of struggling going on. But amidst all of that, we have hope that the Keytruda will kick in, and do its job. It is hard to watch.. it is hard to go to work, it is hard to have to continue to do the things I need to do to make life run as smoothly as possible, and sit and be absolutely helpless to his situation. I don’t know how to make him hurt less, I don’t know how to get him to eat, I am running into the unknown and I am blindfolded and smacking every tree limb on the way. I feel guilty for silly things.. like eating a meal, going to the bathroom, going to work, being able to get a good nights sleep. I know that’s not rational.. ugh anyhow. Vent over lol.. just wanted to give a little insight on where we are right this second. Sorry if it was TMI.. just our raw situation..
Love to all.. heart is heavy.. missy my Heart goes out to you and your family.. ❤️ God called another melanoma warrior home.. he is safe now
God bless xoxoxo
Nervous night
