Fighting hopelessness

[Pandalolk]

I have been suffering from MDD for about 8 years now. I am on meds and attend therapy. But I feel that the real world is too fast and harsh for me. I am constantly scared. Everything is taking the life out of me. I am trying to apply for my master's for the third time. I don't feel that I will get accepted this time as well but I am gonna apply. I won't apply again after this. I can't go through the humiliation of asking my recommenders for the 4th time. For the job I love to do, getting a masters is necessary. I already switched my career with so much difficulties. Feeling hopeless about what's waiting for me. I know that my problem might not be considered big. But I don't know who can understand the misery I am in.