Sober vs alcohol

[Tamka39]

I been on Prozac for 12 days and been trying to stay away from the Xanax it hurts because I want to do things but it feels like am struck and my family don't understand my mom is here for probably for another week and she’s going back home because of a new job am tried of the ups and downs of this I want to have a life sober but days like this makes it impossible to do stay sober guess this is what early sobriety feels like

[Hidden]

Hello Tamka39

I read your other post about drinking and it feels to me you are struggling in staying sober , trying maybe to find reasons or justify maybe why it would be ok to drink again ? sorry if I am sensing this wrong but I have been there

26 years ago my last drink took me in Hospital and they did not know if I would make it or not well I did and 26 years I have now been sober

No it is not easy especially at the start and sometimes even 26 years later when life is tough my head will say I could murder a drink but then I remember what the drink did , one was never enough and all that ever resulted in is me been drunk and when a sobered all up all my problems were still there and maybe even more because when I drunk I created even more !

When we get sober we are never promised that life will get better because life throws things at us but what they do promise is we will deal with them better , nit at first maybe but eventually

When you feel like a drink , ask yourself will this really help ?

OK yes for a few hours a few days depending how long you drink for your problems will go away , your emotions will be dampened but unless you stay drunk eventually you are going to have to face them as whatever is causing you pain will not not by a miracle go away it will still be there

Take it a day at a time , for today you will not pick up a drink no matter what get thrown at you and tomorrow well you will deal with that when it comes

Take Care x

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you and early sobriety is hard but am trying

[Hidden in reply to Tamka39]

No one said it would be easy but a life drinking day in day out to escape reality is harder and eventually will lead to health issues which may not be reversible , deep down you don't want that

Have you any local AA meetings in your area you can attend and maybe if you have or do by going you can get a Sponsor that will help you through these early days x

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

Right now my anxiety and depression is through the roof and I have no energy at all I read the big book listen to speakers in You tube and online groups

[Hidden in reply to Tamka39]

Do you know that alcohol is one of the most depressive substances you can put in your body it actually makes you more depressed and when you drink you may feel calmer but as it is wearing of it has the reverse effect and makes you feel more anxious so that is why we end up in a mess because eventually we have to drink all the time to get that calm feeling we are looking for and eventually the result is we can't get that feeling anymore no matter how much we drink so as much as it may feel it is the answer it really isn't it is just another problem we have to deal with on top of what we already are trying to deal with

I would speak with your Doctor and see if they can change your meds , tell them the truth how you are feeling , keep using the on line groups and see if there is one you can go to in person , meeting others face to face who have been where you are or are going through it now like you are really does benefit you x

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

I be self medicating off alcohol since my teens years only time I remember get breaks is when I became pregnant 🤰 but as soon as my body healed and the 6 weeks was over I was probably back drinking I thought for a long time that drinking would solve my problems but I was just lying to myself because don’t matter have much I drink right now it seems like I don’t get the calm feeling no is harder for me now to relax and that’s the reason I don’t drinking it wasn’t doing anything for me no more I was just wasting my money 💰 I will let my doctor know how am feeling I have a therapist appointment next Tuesday am just praying things get better for me because am struggling and is driving me crazy 😜

[Hidden in reply to Tamka39]

I do understand , I found drink when I was only 13 and was an anxious child , I took to it there and then and it continued right through to me been nearly 30 , like you every time I was pregnant I managed to stop , I was lucky in that respect as I think something in me knew I would damage the baby if I continued , unlike you the first day home I would be back on the drink as soon as I had given birth I waited for nothing to heal

But in the end it stops been what you thought it was your friend and it becomes your worse enemy just like depression and anxiety which we no doubt started drinking over in the first place none are our friends but when they take hold of us they are hard to shake of

How long has it been since you last had a drink ?

I know the first year I felt like it was never going to get better , times were when I felt I was hanging on by my finger nails but they promised me as I went to AA meetings that it would get better eventually and slowly it did

I mean what alternative is there , we have a choice , we either stop and stay stopped and slowly wait for things to improve or we carry on and slowly wait to die what could be a dreadful death with what you can get through drinking

I remember my last drink even now

Took me in the hospital as I said on a heart machine they didn't know if I would make it or not but when I came out I knew I could not continue , in fact a Doctor told me I would have 2 years tops if I carried on , so I prayed eve though I am not a believer to either take me or help me stop drinking as it had to be one or the other , I did not want to die and somehow , someway I found AA and with the help of others knowing exactly how I felt and what I was going through I got sober and have stayed that way

My life , well that still throws rubbish at me , my anxiety that still plays up , do I sometimes crave a drink " Yes " do I take one "No" but what I have learnt is drinking will never solve anything and I cannot drink like a normal person if I pick one up I may never stop and with that latter thought no matter how bad things feel I stay sober

I would be open and honest at your appointments best way to be , in fact I have just took a phone call and someone asked me to be honest and when I was they sounded shocked I thought and even said well if you tell me to be honest then I will but I have found if I don't say how it is how can anyone help me ?

You will get through this , I won't pretend at times it may feel unbearable because I remember for me it was but I would just say for today I will not drink and sometimes when the pain was to bad I would have to stay away from the drink as little as an hour at a time sometimes 30 minutes but slowly but surely those times went into weeks , then months and now years , if I can do it I know you can x

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

Am still in early sobriety is only been 2 weeks for me and am waiting for the depression medication to kick in and I been on them for 12 days I been crying for no reason having brain fog and anxiety I just feel lost right-now like this will never end and I don’t have any energy and am praying to get through this is just so hard

[Hidden in reply to Tamka39]

O goodness me you are very very early into sobriety and no wonder you are feeling like this , it is awful but normal and trust me hang in there because it will pass

My early days I could not sleep , my anxiety felt like it was going to explode , I would shake , sweat , pace up and down , the walls would feel like they were coming in on me when I laid down to sleep even though I struggled to sleep and yes a lot of tears to !

Those meds will kick in eventually but as I said alcohol is a depressant so if you drink while taking meds then you won't get the full effect from the meds as it will counteract them

Drink plenty of sugary drinks and eat sugary foods , now I know these are not good for you but they are better than a drink and the reason I say get plenty of sugar in you is that alcohol is the one thing we forget contains some of the highest sugar levels , so when you stop drinking your sugar levels can drop quick as well as your body can be craving sugar which can make you feel like you want a drink , so by eating sweet things it helps that craving and if you do put a bit of weight on it does not matter because you will loose it at a later date when you are more stable

Nice bubble baths where you can try and relax and wind down , keep yourself as occupied as you possible can , I remember in the early days people would say that to me and I would say I have done everything and they would reply well do it all again but they were right I had to stay occupied to distract myself

If you really want to be sober and stay sober trust me you can , if you don't then people will say it does not work but that is because deep down they were not ready to stop

Don't worry about how you are feeling this is quite normal , you are very very early into stopping drinking but it does and will get better x

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for sharing your story

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

Alcohol damage your heart?

[Hidden in reply to Tamka39]

Eventually if you abuse alcohol it will cause damage , sometimes it can affect the heart but your liver is something it attacks first

Do not be worrying about your heart that will be fine and if you stay sober as well it will help keep you fit and healthy x

[Tamka39]

Yes am very early in sobriety and am scared because I remember like it was yesterday when I stop drinking a year ago it got bad I couldn’t sleep eat or take care of myself I stayed in my room for months scared to walk to my own kitchen and living room and scared to walk out my own front door couldn’t any drive my car no more that’s what am scared of right now I don’t want to get that bad again drinking have very destroyed my life I thought once I stop drinking I thought I would have my life back though I would start back cooking and cleaning and doing everything I like to do boy was I wrong is the opposite I more lost now than when I was drinking like my Brain don’t get it I stop drinking and that alone is making me more depressed and anxious and brain fog don’t know how long I can continue like this but am so sick of it

[MT2018]

I just replied to a different post of yours, now seeing this one! You deff need to get to a support group (maybe daily?) to help you cope and give you strategies to help you! If you're already involved in one, doesn't sound like it is meeting your needs! Have you heard of CR? (Celebrate Recovery) We have one in our area, and it's great...people to meet, meals to share, lots of love, and real answers and strategies. I also love that there are people there who can be called day or night to help out. It's a national thing-so pretty sure there'd be one near you, whereever you live. Also-you're using one thing to self-medicate when your meds don't do the trick for you. Have you talked to your Dr/Therapist about the need for an adjustment? Maybe Prozak isn't the right one, either! Sorry you are having to tweak things and I'm sure your mom makes it so much better Who else is nearby that can help? If there's no one, maybe you can meet people at support groups! You've got kids that need you to take the steps necessary to be there for them...so I strongly encourage seek the help you need! HUGS. Oh-and remember, one day at a time. That is all. Don't worry about yesterday-it's already gone. Don't fret about tomorrow-it's not here yet. Just focus on the day you are in. Set some mini goals for that day and rock it out! You can do it!

[Tamka39 in reply to MT2018]

Never heard of CR, am in Michigan and I have a psychiatrist therapist case management and a dr my anxiety and depression is through the roof am always panicking when I leave my house or going places