Can't go on like this!

I'm 19, my anxiety has taken over most of my life, I just want to go and do normal things my age group do! My anxiety has ripped this all from me, and I barely leave the house. My stomach churns, I feel sick, I panic, i go hot and I just want to burst into tears and go crawl into a hole.

I had to tell my friends I couldn't go out to a club with them the other night as I wouldn't have coped with the people, noise and the surroundings in general. I know I'd have a break Down making a huge fool out of my self

Now me and one of my friends have planned to go shopping on Tuesday, I'm already panicking, freaking out and thinking of all the bad things that could happen, like the whole world is going to end!

I just want to normal but I guess it's too much to ask, I feel like a stupid idiot and a failure. I could just sit and cry. :(

6 Replies

  • Hi Horsemad,

    Had to reply as you sound so similar to my own daughter, she's 16.

    Wish I had a magic wand that could make it disappear for you both, but I don't, sorry.

    This may not help you, but dd finds it a little easier if she prepares and thinks ahead. You have a shopping trip you said? How lovely. So, think about when you need to start getting ready, how are you getting there and back, pick your clothes out the night before etc.

    try to think of anything that may be a problem and plan for it. Write a to do list if it helps.

    Then, think of your escape routes. By that I mean, if you're on the bus and think, "I can't do this " what can you do? Well you can get off the bus, call your friend and tell her you won't be able to make it, sorry. If you get there and it's getting too much, suggest going for a coffe or something and have a break, or make any excuse and say sorry, I need to go. Remember, you don't have to give details or explain yourself.

    When in a crowded place,make a note of the exits and remind yourself, "I can leave at any time"

    Anyway, I've gone on long enough. I hope you are getting some help and you enjoy your shopping.



  • Thankyou so much! I did everything you suggested and it helped massively. I did have one little thought that I couldn't cope so we went for a drink some where quiet and it made it better. We have even arranged to go to the cinema in a few weeks, which I guess be nice! Xxxxx

  • Wow, you did it! So darn proud of you. It takes a lot of courage to face your fears. Having a plan puts YOU in control....not your anxiety. When a person feels a sense of control, it makes a world of difference. You may not think you are 100% perfect but by God you are doing what YOU want to. I am just so excited for you and for the excellent suggestion to MAKE A PLAN! I am going to try to do that for myself.

  • Well done you!

    Not just for going and coping but also for putting the effort in in the first place.

    So pleased for you. Take heart from this success and letus know how the cinema trip goes.

    Good luck! :)



  • You aren't alone. I'm 16 and have been dealing with bad anxeity for several months and it makes me so naueous and I get hot flashes and can't go hang out with me friends either. It's hard it really is but me knowing I'm not alone also helps so hopefuly this helps you. It won't go on forever. Just keep your head up and try to find something that can take your mind off of it, I draw or listen to music or take myself outside to get fresh air.

  • I am seriously the same way. Usually crying helps me. I will feel realy sick to my stomach, hot flashes, and my heart will beat fast. I won't hang out with anyone, and when I do I make up some excuse to leave early. And it so hard to explain why I can't hang out and do this and that. But it helps to know I'm not alone. Hope it helps you too.

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