Do you ever feel like nobody actually ... - Living with Anxiety

Living with Anxiety

5,799 members3,304 posts

Do you ever feel like nobody actually cares?

I find myself listening to people and caring so much about their stories and everything that they share with me, thinking oh good it's my turn to talk and share about myself.. only for them to cut you off and make it about them again, sometimes I just feel so alone and like nobody actually cares and people only want to talk about themselves. I try to be nice and give them the benefit of the doubt and I'll maybe bring it up again what I was trying to say the first time, and they listen for a sec and kinda just shut you out quick. This is why I've gone mute, I don't share anything anymore because I just don't feel like a person anymore. I feel ignored by the world and I feel like because of me going silent I'm losing my people skills and just have severe social anxiety because I can't just connect with anybody. My whole perception of the world is off and I don't feel like anything I say or do matters. 🤷‍♀️

23 Replies

I'm so sorry your feeling this way but can relate. A lot of people are about themselves these days but there is always someone on this site that would love to listen and try and give an opinion on things. So go ahead and let some of us in on your feelings and we will try andx be there for you anyway we can. You are not alone. Hope you feel better soon.

I am sorry you feel alone. The world as a society are much about themselves. I can relate in some ways. However know the are some who care in their way. I will listen and help if I can. 🙏💗

in reply to Gill1970

Thank you very much for your support and for reassuring me that I'm not the only one, having so much trouble at work it's really hard for me to work because of how people's energies negatively affect me. I sense so much around me, it makes it so hard to fit in and be able to connect to others because all I sense is danger and people aren't very genuine :(

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

I hear you. ❤️

Hello :-)

I relate to what you are saying so very much !

People asking how you are , you tell them and then they go on to tell you their issues

Had this most my life , I go to extremes to try and help others and yet I never find the same back

It does make you feel you want to say nothing as saying nothing can be less painful than been what feels like dismissed

I can count on less than not even a hand as we say how many actually want to know how I feel but let me reassure you that you can come on here and talk to us and we will listen and we will do our best to let you know we care :-)

Take Care x

in reply to

I feel everything you just said, it's absolutely difficult to mingle with people because I just see right through people. I see how they interact and I pay so much attention to the small things that just show they actually aren't paying attention and they are just listening to reply and not listening to understand, they just want to say yeah yeah and continue about themselves. It's such a cruel world and I feel completely alone not being able to make connections 💔

in reply to

I know how you feel but be reassured it does not just happen to you

People regretfully not all but so many are all about looking after themselves and it hurts when you give so much , not that you want anything back in return but when you need it and they push you to one side it is painful

Know that it is them and not you , you are one of the rare caring people in this world and should feel proud that you are :-)

It is hard I know when by nature you are this way but maybe try to not give so much and save that for yourself instead :-)

You can talk to us , we will listen and hope that helps a little :-)

How are you doing at the moment , how is life ?

After asking that question I have just read a reply you have done to someone else and I can see you are struggling at work which must be so dreadful as I imagine you have to be there every day :-(

My Daughter does not suffer with anxiety , she is quite the opposite , yet the people she works with are not great and she has had so many issues with them , yes it upsets her , but she gets on with her job and thinks you lot get on with it !

People cannot harm you , they can upset you but not harm you , when we have anxiety we are very sensitive though and we can see these negatives as a threat and we put a protection around us so we feel safe

Maybe some of them are not as bad if your anxiety would just take a step back and let them in a little as I know because I fear I can push people away without giving them a chance

But if they really all are a bad bunch then I would get on with my job as you need the money it provides but maybe look at other things I could do job wise , there are always options , may take a while but they are there if we keep looking :-)

Also there is a saying

We go to work to earn enough money to live not to make friends :-)

You will work through this :-) x

in reply to

I try to tell myself this daily, but I just have such a hard time with people next to me.. wanting to talk about themselves all day particularly this one woman at work who is very full of herself and I've been trying to ignore her lately but she now makes me feel even more like shit. I just don't even know how to deal with people anymore, I just want to work.. I want to do my job and go home, I do want to talk but I'm very terrified of small talk I shut down, I can't even look people in their eyes and I just tend to ignore the world around me, and I'm sure by now people think I'm some type of freak because I've gone years being like this and it's really just gotten to a point where I no longer feel of any value anywhere, I feel like I'm not wanted here, I dont belong, and I feel very disliked and I almost feel I did it to myself. I'm highly sensitive and I just don't even know what kind of job I could even hold or do :'(

in reply to

You are very much valued , you are needed and you are certainly not a freak !

You started of not been able to cope with something so you did things to try and protect yourself , people that are sensitive and have anxiety do this and that does not make you a bad person or less than anyone else in this world :-)

To be honest if I had to listen to someone going on about themselves it would drive me mad and lot's of others to

Just because other people look as if they are interacting with her and each other and maybe do a good job in your eyes looking like they are enjoying it how do you know they are not thinking I wished she would shut up !

We are so hard on ourselves and we need to give ourselves a break but anxiety likes us to keep suffering then it can keep a hold on us !

And if they did think you were a freak ( which I bet they don't ) who are they ? why what they think matters , they are no better than you and if that is what they think well they are not the kind of people I would want to be interacting with !

I think some Counselling would really help you even if you have tried it before , you could speak with your Doctor or even self refer if you are in the UK

If you are in the UK have a look at this link and see what you think

They offer 6 free sessions and I have known a lot of people have benefited from them :-)

I will pop the link on :-) x

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

I’m so sorry you are suffering. Just today as I left the house to run I felt just like you say, like I’m not wanted and don’t belong in my neighborhood or anywhere actually. I tried to self talk some logic but it didn’t quit work,... even as I run I have a feeling someone is watching me. I don’t know why I always feel that.

I think there can be good coming out of you being sensitive but I know it’s hard at the same time. I can tell you are a sweet caring amazing strong person. Sometimes I wish everyone was sensitive.

I hear you it’s hard to be okay at a job. So stressful. I don’t work now but I dream of working in gardens or on farms Closest I’ve been is had a job as a zookeeper and a garden shop. My favorite jobs were special needs children related. What is your favorite work to do?

Those words really hit me hard 💜 in a good way. Thank you for being really kind and uplifting and making me see things in a different perspective. The thing about me is I mirror people, so if they are treating me a certain way I act that way too. If they are really sweet I can be 10x sweeter.. but when people ignore me and make me feel shitty or just become selfish I just shut down completely I can't do confrontation and I just end up crying for everything. I'm a cry baby to be honest my emotions come so strong I just let them out in tears and I know no other way. I don't know how to just be zen and find a happy medium within myself. I'm either all happy or all sad. It fluctuates constantly, and I'm trying to work on myself but no matter what I do from clean eating, to meditation, I sometimes feel I can't be fixed 🤷‍♀️ you have been such a wonderful person and I wish I knew people like you in real life. Everyone here is so beautiful and it makes me want to cry that I can't just know these people in person because these are my people, the broken beautiful souls of the world that constantly feel rejected 💔

in reply to

You are more normal than you think you are :-)

Of course if people are nice it is normal we react nicely , if people are not so nice some may react badly but lots & lots of people me included are like you , we shut down , that is fine if that helps you cope and crying is fine to , it realises emotions and you are not a cry baby , you are a sensitive soul and if only more were ! :-)

Who says it is you that needs to be fixed and not others ?

Who says that you are in the wrong because you feel the way you do ?

I think you should start looking at learning to love yourself ( I know not easy ) accept this is you and most important believe that you are unique and special and don't be so hard on yourself , be kind to yourself , you deserve it :-) x

in reply to

That's definitely so hard for me I guess, to have compassion and love for myself.. because I'm always thinking I need to fit in so I beat myself up and just feel drained by society. I really am born to stand out and I need to be easy on myself. It's just easy when I have the support of understanding people on my side. I'm really grateful for all that you have said and it really opens my eyes to know I'm not alone. Up until yesterday when I found this site I was really set on the fact that I was alone, but this platform has showed me otherwise. You are literally such a blessing and I admire you for all the love and support you are giving me 🥰🙏

in reply to

All you need to be is yourself :-)

All you can be is yourself :-)

If people like it great and if people don't , who are there to care about no one and they certainly are not perfect :-)

Have the best day you can today :-) x

in reply to

I'm trying my best to not let the world around me affect and just be happy within myself, after all the positive feedback everybody gave me yesterday through this post it has really helped me and I'm having a much better day than yesterday! I hope you are having a wonderful day as well thank you for being there 🥰

in reply to

I am so pleased to read your reply and read you have felt more positive today and it has been a better day :-)

You may have your up's and down's as it takes time to change the way we think and we are here when you need us so never think you are alone :-) x

in reply to

Life is one big wave you gotta learn to ride, but it sucks when you know nothing about surfing lol

Thank you so much for being there and giving me alot of encouragement I really appreciate it!

in reply to

We are all here for each other so no need for thanks even though very much appreciated :-)

Life certainly is one big wave and we will learn to ride them as they come along and with each one we will get stronger :-)

I hope tomorrow is another good day for you but whatever it brings always know you tried your best and that is good enough :-) x

in reply to

That's another one of my problems, I'm constantly thanking people or saying sorry.. I have so much I've yet to learn about life and interactions because I've been in the solitude of my room that I forget what it was like to be human with the others. It was a very nice day today and I'm praying for another good one tomorrow, going to be spending the weekend with my sister so that should be very relaxing. I wish you a peaceful day tomorrow! ☮🌝

in reply to

O well I am the same , I am forever saying I am sorry just for been me !!! :-D

I am always saying I am sorry that I suffer with anxiety but I am trying now to stop saying it and when I slip up and say it I say after , no actually I am not sorry I can't help the way I am , takes practice though :-)

I am agoraphobic so especially in the winter I hardly see or speak to anyone , I do have my long suffering husband though with me and I have 3 grown up children , the eldest is 40 this year but I did have her young , thought I would drop that in as it makes me feel old saying my eldest is nearly 40 :-D

My youngest is nearly 26 , he is my only boy and he is still at home , but other than my hubby and Son I do not see hardly anyone , my Daughters left home years ago and are always busy with work

Sounds like a lovely weekend you have planned and I hope you enjoy it , I wonder if you are close to your Sister if talking with her would help ?

If not enjoy your time with her and you are lucky you get on as I just have one Sister and we are like chalk and cheese if you have ever heard that saying :-/

From starting this post , you may not be able to see it and you may not feel it but I can already see a change in how you are sounding which is lovely to pick up on :-)

Just talking can help so much knowing someone understands , it goes such a long way :-) x

Yes yes yes!! So many people are wicked narsissistic and only care about themselves! I work all day with clients and I’ve learned over the years that they don’t care what you say and it’s all about them. I was even told by a co worker once that “ no one cares about you and what’s going on in your life. Stop talking about it”. Harsh but she was right. I now only reserve my personal life for my real friends. People who really care about you will listen. Don’t waste time or make selfish people make you feel bad.

What a harsh reality we have to face, but damn.. that story really resonated with me, I'm sorry you had to deal with all those people and jeeeez that person was a complete A-hole for even just flat out saying that! I'm with you there about not wasting my energy anymore on shitty people who only care about themselves :) I've been ignoring this narcissist woman all day and with a smile on my face and to be honest it's working I can feel her getting angry because shes not getting the attention she's seeking!

After reading all these posts, I smiled! You are doing a wonderful job of being yourself! Open, honest, sincere, and forward thinking! Please keep posting! You are encouraging all of us to be the, honest, sincere, and forward thinking. Blessings!!

You may also like...