Infertility Support

Thinking about Surrogacy

Hi

girls!

I'm 37 and just suffered two miscarriages. I'm now thinking that maybe it won't happen for me.

An option I am considering is surrogacy and I'm thinking about the Ukraine. They have agencies there who can assist you in finding a surrogate and the laws are favourable. It also costs a lot less then the US which can cost up to $100,000.

Has anyone had any experience with this? What do other people think of this idea.

19 Replies
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Hi there. Completely your choice I know but surrogacy is a big step. I know miscarriage is a mystery but have your GP or hospital talked to you about anything which could be causing it? I only say this as I have endometriosis. I could not fall naturally so have had IVF (5 in total). On the last two cycles I got pregnant but then I miscarried. I have since had further tests to check my womb, natural kill cells and my husband had a sperm fragmentation test. All I am saying is it could be worth looking into further tests and speaking to your doctor.

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hi there!being in this condition is natural and uncalled for.choosing surrogacy as an option is the best way out.My friend was not able to produce children as well but at last, managed to do so using this procedure from the same country.She is very much satisfied and did not find anything unreasonable with them. They were cheap and the facilities were top class for e.g: accommodation, no language barrier as they provide interpreters etc.Many are choosing it and I myself want to try it soon. Hope you find the best out there!

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Hello! I really do not have any idea about what surrogacy is really like, in fact, i am on this forum to get to know about the whole procedure and how exactly it is done because I have been a lot of people talking about it lately. I have been TTC for many many years and I have only been facing failures since then. I just hope that I find a suitable way to get a baby and make my life a little more beautiful. Do let me know if you find something about this treatment.

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I am very sorry to hear about your miscarriages. First before talking about surrogacy I would recommend visiting a physician to select a possible reason that these miscarriages might be happening. However, if it is not solvable or if it is too big of a problem then surrogacy is a viable option. My own sister had her son through surrogacy and it was a fairly easy process. The Ukraine is a very good place since they have a lot of clinics with highly trained personnel who help you throughout the process. Also as you stated it is also far less expensive that in USA so it is an even more viable option. If you feel that it is a viable option then please consider surrogacy. However, I would recommend that you first thoroughly research surrogacy and select a clinic that is best suited to you along with the rates they provides, service, time etc.

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OMG 100000 $..... I heard in Ukraine it cost 40000 euro!

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We're currently passing 3rd round ivf with donor egg. (We conceived our beautiful twins with the 2nd shot, #1 was bfn). This is Ukranian clinic. We've been successful with them once so decided to go back for more kids. As for surrogacy costs here. They vary from 29.900 to 49.900 EUR depending on a package. I guess it's really worth looking onto ;)

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Wich package you choose?

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See, we don't apply for surrogacy treatment. We used donor eggs with ivf. That was a 5 shot package for 9900 EUR. It included medical treatment. Egg donor fee. Medications needed. Services needed. Also accomodation, meals and transportation. It also states guaranteed refund.

As for surrogacy packages, they are avaliable on mother-surrogate.info

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Which clinic did you choose?

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I'm not sure I can here but it's biotexcom. To be fair, there are other clinics in Ukraine that are great as well, and you will find similar plans there. The reason we chose biotex is because we independently read a lot of great reviews online. There isn’t as much info in the US forums as there are in European forums, as Ukraine is only a two or three hour flight for most, and since they are in different languages, we had to use Google Translate to gather the intel on some the forums. Here's a super blog to read for those planning to undergo surrogacy asiu.us.

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Hey. Hope you are well. Yes, I have some experience here. I had my son through surrogacy. He is nine months old now. My husband and I tried to conceive for three years but failed. It was because of his smoking habits that affected his sperm motility. My uterus was unable to carry a child too. The problem was with the both of us. I went to the same place you mentioned. It was affordable for me. I wanted to go for the most convenient, safe and affordable option. I had to wait for a while after making the appointment and the rest of the procedures till they found me a surrogate. They found one for me in three months. the procedure was done on her. She conceived and nine months later I had my baby boy. Good thing is, it was totally their responsibility. I didn't have to worry about anything. I think you should go for it. Best of luck.

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I have same concerns now. My dh and I have been ttc for 8 years already. I’ve got pregnant 2 years ago, but I’ve lost my baby on 7th month. I’ve lost my fertility and there no chance for us to conceive any more. Not only it’s hard for me to even think about surrogacy, I’m still in pain after our loss, but also prices make it seem like there is no chance for us to have children. I’ve been thinking to ask my dh sister or my bff to carry a baby for us. I made some hints while talking to them. It was clear for me they don’t want to do this. And I don’t blame them! I understand that not everyone is ready to become a surrogate. So now I hope to find cheaper options… I know that there are not really expensive variants in Europe. My dh is completely for going there. He makes his own research. Maybe he’ll find something… But I think it’s better to go to US. High prices show that there is high guarantee of success. At the same time it’s so upsetting that we will have to take a loan to have surrogacy there… To be honest, I’m lost. I feel bad all the time. This whole situation is so stressful…

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Yep, there are so many options. But some of them are very sketchy. So one should watch carefully. After much gleaning in forums, I'd say Ukraine may be the choice. First, it is relatively affordable. After some research done, there are places with all-inclusive plans starting at 32k up to 50k. They cover absolutely everything outside the plane tickets. Also meds and all things that involve IVF for you if you are using your own eggs, surrogate screening and medical costs, and birth at the hospital. It is also the same price if you choose to use donor eggs instead, which is a nice back-up plan to have if things don’t work out with your own, at no additional cost. The strongest side is that one of the clinics there guarantees you a baby. In case the first surrogate doesn’t work out, they will try again with another one using your frozen embryos until they are successful. Also, it seems like Ukraine is one of the few places where the laws favor the intended parents rather than the surrogate. Here is what I read. Under Ukrainian law, the baby is yours from the moment of conception. Once the baby is born, the birth certificate is issued with your names and the surrogate cannot claim any rights. Lastly, this is going to be time-wise. Pregnancy tends to start right after embryos are created because many women participate in surrogacy in Ukraine.

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Hello dear! I'm really sorry you have to go through such pain. I know that this is really hard to be strong in such situation. I had 6 miscarriages. I completely understand the reason why you chose such method to stop feeling the pain. We have been trying to conceive for 8 years. These years were a nightmare for us. I am very lucky I have supportive husband. But his and mine parents make the situation worse. They can't stop asking when we will give them grandchildren. They can't stop blaming me in inability to have children. They can't stop turning my life into a nightmare. In such situation it is very hard not to give up and stop trying. I've changed so many doctors, so many hospitals. I've tried literally everything to get pregnant and the most important to save the pregnancy. Unfortunately nothing worked for me. We wasted so much money and nerves and got nothing in result. After the pain we went through I'm actually surprised that we still have tiny bit of hope. We are thinking about the surrogacy option. This is our last chance and we want to use it. Dear I wish you all the best! I hope you will find answers to your questions. I wish you to find an option which will help you to become a mother!

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Did you ask the reason? I think you should confirm that before deciding anything. Otherwise, surrogacy is a great option. Yeah, I have heard the clinic there are affordable. I think they can suit you well. I hope everything works out for you. Baby dust your way.

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I'm so sorry about your MCs. I know how it feels. I know how painful it is. I still remember how I felt after mine and that was horrible. My DH and I have gone through a lot during past 8 years. I had 3 MCs and I should say they broke me, my mental and physical health. Each loss was unbearable. I was stressed and depressed all the time. Sometimes I can't believe I survived after going through all that shit. Though our tries to TTC didn't give results, we moved on and we are waiting for our baby to be born via surrogacy. I want to say that there are still options available. So don't give up! Don't let stress to control you and your mind.

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Just thought I shoud tell more. Here's my story. I'm a ripe aged woman, years ago diagnosed on luteal phase deffect. Here I've used to hear 'Love, this is not a big deal. Adding some progesteron will definitely help!' So probably it would have helped if only my eggs were healthy..After years of ttc actively and trying things aimed at fertility boosting, like:

a sperm friendly lubricant, a supplement with Myo-Inositol, acupuncture, extra vitamin B6 and Zinc, eating fertility friendly foods, getting to the right BMI we did find ourselves at a fertility clinic overseas. Our dr gave us less than 10% verdict of conceiving with oe. We didn't want to risk as playing game with those own egg quality. So after long discussions decided to go egg donation route. I conceived twins with the 2nd ivf shot. Though the whole process was not smooth and easy. I mean my doubting whether I was naughty with requirements for our donor. The point is that we chose 2. Intended donor#1 had at that time a 1,5 yo baby, so I wandered whether she could be perfectly fit for releasing high quality eggs. Donor#2 was 28 yo and had 2 kids of her own, but I thought she was too old to participate..I know this sounds silly now when we've been through ivf and when now we know the aspects one should be aware of firsthanded. But then all unanswered questions really drove me crazy. The story continues like this. Having already had twins through de ivf we decided to apply to the same place for one more/two more babies :)

AngelLika, what clinic did you/ are you using?

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Surrogacy played an important role in our lives as this very way we got our sweet long awaited baby. I was born without a womb which purely made it surrogacy/adoption path. Though I've never been 100% there. Adoption sounded even more strange to my ear, dh had another point of view. Finally after months of emotional strugglings we applied for surrogacy with Ukrainian biotexcom clinic. Our embryo was implanted in the summer 2013. Our tiny bean was said to be just perfect so we felt we weren't near the hassle. Our minds fully sat on rest..Can't say why - we just trusted the place, its staff, the things were going just right. Our beautiful Laria was born weighing 8lb 12 oz. She was born by planned Caesarean on March 17, 2014. I was ale to be at our surrogate's side in the operating room. Saw everything with own eyes. It was amazing! A new life coming into this world..so tiny and sweet and lovely. I wish I could experience the same, but God's the one who decides. Our surrogate healed well but a bit longer than expected. Her body became to weak to resist meds affects..Poor thing she was, dear. Some people say surrogates are purely exploited for a sum of money and that usually there are no friendly relationship between IP and surrogate. Personally I don't believe this. Well, I can't understand this better to say. For me it's impossible to stay appart from a surrogates needs, worries, whatever. We lived the story with her from the first day to our last. We still keep in touch with her. As far as we know, she's planning to carry one more baby for a Norwegian couple which is absolutely amazing! We're happy to hear some news from her from time to time. She always asks us about our daughter.. I know she's wishing the best only. So for those considering surrogacy treatment I'd recommend searching a clinic with high success rates in eastern Europe as it is more affordable and seems more favourable as for surrogacy laws. You should never be in haste with decisions.

I believe it's helpful to share experiences on the point and finding more people sailing in the same boat..For me it definitely was!

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I am very sorry to hear about your miscarriages. First before talking about surrogacy I would recommend visiting a physician to select a possible reason that these miscarriages might be happening. However, if it is not solvable or if it is too big of a problem then surrogacy is a viable option. My own sister had her son through surrogacy and it was a fairly easy process. The Ukraine is a very good place since they have a lot of clinics with highly trained personnel who help you throughout the process. Also as you stated it is also far less expensive that in USA so it is an even more viable option. If you feel that it is a viable option then please consider surrogacy. However, I would recommend that you first thoroughly research surrogacy and select a clinic that is best suited to you along with the rates they provides, service, time etc.

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