Need Info on Surrogacy – Please help - Infertility Support

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Need Info on Surrogacy – Please help

diannakey
diannakey
27 Replies

I am from Minnesota, aged 38 now and over the last 6 years have had 3 miscarriages. It is really devastating to lose a baby let alone 3 on the trot. DH and I now feel that it is best to opt for surrogacy. But questions remain. How do I find a surrogate mother? Do I need a lawyer to draw up a contract? What rates do I have to pay her? Have contacted a few clinics here and their rates are very high. Can anyone provide some precise info on surrogacy?

27 Replies
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RashidaCSeger

I would suggest that you do not take all the responsibility. For example, the payment issue can be very tricky. There are hundreds of things to be taken into account, right from food supplements to maternity clothes for the surrogate mother and it is best left to a lawyer to work out the details.

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Ailsa101

Except what you are concerned, I think there are other things you need to know about how to use surrogacy.

The American Society for Reproductive Medicine says a surrogate should get a medical exam to check that she's likely to have a healthy, full-term pregnancy. The organization suggests she gets tests that check for infectious diseases such as syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia, HIV, cytomegalovirus, and hepatitis B and C.

Surrogates should get tests to make sure they have immunity to measles, rubella (German measles), and chickenpox. Also, you may want to ask that she get a medical procedure to visually "map" the uterus, which can help the doctor check her potential to carry a pregnancy. A surrogate mother should have her own doctor during pregnancy rather than use yours.

The cost of surrogacy can range from $80,000 to $120,000. A lot of different things go into the price, such as whether the surrogate has her own medical insurance or whether you need to buy a surrogacy-pregnancy policy for her.

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JessicaJ

Hi Diannakey , Donor Concierge has access to more US surrogates than anyone in the world who are available now .They work with over 40 trusted surrogacy agencies across the country . you can contact them . you will definitely find someone who really understand your concern ............ Just finger crossed and Good Luck!!!!!

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Shemona

Hi Diannakey , Its really sad to know about your story and I really appreciate your decision of surrogacy . Go through this link . Hope it will help you to find out the answer of your all queries.......

inspire.com/search/?group_i...

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paulinadave

Hello Diannakey, How do you do? Have doctors told you a reason for your multiple MC? There are other primary ways, for example, IUI, ICSI & IVF. Have you tried any of them? I think you should try one of them and then go for Surrogacy. In order to find a surrogate mother, you should better search in Facebook groups or you can contact surrogacy agency (if you have one in your country).Clinic in Ukraine have amazing and pocket-friendly packages you should visit it if you can. Take care Good luck!

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heath225

Hi, I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriages. To get to your question right away - so, you don't necessarily need to find a surrogate by yourself. Many infertility clinics offer in-house surrogates database. They, of course, will charge for their services. Most of the couples go for this option. However, you have an option to provide the clinic with a surrogate. For that, you can ask around. Put this on your social media accounts' timelines. This won't be easy I tell you that. Once you have found a volunteer, she will need to fulfill the clinic's criteria. You can check the criteria of a clinic by going to their website or talking to their support. You can also go the agency route.

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evadabney5

Hi diannakey,

I can understand what you are going through. My DH and I faced infertility when we already had our DS Den. I had hysterectomy after Den's delivery, it took time to heal and recover, both physically and psycho. We always wanted to have more kids and never ever though everything could work this way. Adoption was discussed as an option. We even contacted a few adoption agencies but found out it was so complicated, time and money-consuming, and most importantly - providing no guarantees for a match and final green light for adoption.

All our friends were telling us to try surrogacy, but we never took it seriously.

Willy-nilly, we started exploring this option. Our journey brought us to Kiev, Ukraine. We were there just a week ago while our DS was staying with his grandparents. We went to the Surrogacyinfo which is considered as one of the best clinics in Ukraine. One can even find details about it online. We met people there in the clinic and who shared their stories and I shared ours. Some kept trying again and again many times. I don't want it to be a forever journey. The doctors here in

Surrogacyinfo are very supportive. Our doctor said that we're young and it gives us much more chances for success from the very first attempt.

FYI, the surrogacy can be held with your husbands sperm and your eggs if you pass few tests they take at the clinic.

Good Luck !!

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PolinaN

Try surrogate motherhood abroad, it's much cheaper than in the US! I did IVF in Ukraine, this company can help you and in surrogate . Canadian medical care - I highly recommend it!

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nataliejames492

Hi, dear. I am with you on the MC journey. I hope you feel better now than before. Surrogacy is a great solution. I can tell this from my experience. Well, I know it is very costly in many countries. You should research clinics in Europe as they offer very reasonable rates. In fact, they are so good that I am even considering surrogacy a second time to get a baby boy this time. It is also safer to contact a lawyer beforehand.

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Luis_

Surrogacy is a blessing. It is the best alternative. You have opted for it. A surrogate is the one that will keep your baby in her womb. The baby would be biologically related to you. But do have an eye on all the points. There can be issues afterward. You have to be alert.

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Anastasia_

Dear, I felt really sad to know about your infertility. But you have come to the right. Surrogacy will be best for you. Surrogacy has granted my blessings to the infertile couples. There would be good for you too. You just have to seek. Yes, you have to find a good surrogate for you. It is really necessary. But you do fulfill all the legal requirements. It is important.

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JanetteMarvin

Hi diannakey! Feel sorry for hearing about your condition, hope you coped with these losses. I have endometriosis in a neglected form and can't be a mother too. My friends prompted me to apply to a reproductive clinic for help and to visit Ukraine with this mission cause their prices are really low on this issue. For example, it's 3-5 times cheaper than in US, depends on a program you choose. We followed this advice and arrived there for making our own research. We visited seven clinics in Kyiv and made a list of advandages and vice versa of each of them and now I can share it with you, just contact me via email: janettemarvin88@gmail.com.

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andylins

I'm just going to answer some of your questions.

How do I find a surrogate mother? - The clinic we've been with has its own pole of donors/surrogates.

Do I need a lawyer to draw up a contract? - IP at the place we've been with have all the legal support within the whole process.

What rates do I have to pay her? Have contacted a few clinics here and their rates are very high. - Depends on the country/clinic/treatment plans.

Can anyone provide some precise info on surrogacy? - Definitely.~All packages are “All Inclusive” which means that they include

: Accommodation. Meals. Medical procedures and medications. Medical and psychological examination of all surrogates. Payments to the surrogate. Transfers to and from the airport and the clinic. Donor eggs if needed. Interpreter with you at the clinic on every visit. Legal help to obtain documents for the baby after it is born. Monthly ultrasound reports with pictures of your baby. English speaking coordinator who will be your point of contact at the clinic. All packages are paid in 5 intallments, the last 2 are after the birth of your child!

All-inclusive Standard €40k:

You will be provided a cellphone with a Ukrainian carrier for communication.

You will stay at a better villa or hotel than the economy package.

A pediatrician will see your child every other day after birth.

Regardless of how far along the surrogate is, if the case of miscarriage, abortion, or death of child, the agency will take care of the cost of paying the surrogate and finding a new one.

In case your baby is born premature, the agency will pay all medical fees regardless.

If you have twins, you must pay an additional €3000 after birth.

You will have 4 hours of nursery and babysitting services available to you every day.

You cannot be at the birth of the baby – you will be able to meet your baby after the hospital clears the baby for leaving the hospital.

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andylins

All-inclusive VIP €50k:

You will be provided a cellphone with a Ukrainian carrier for communication.

You will stay in a standard room at the Venice Hotel or a luxury apartment for the first two visits. And on your final visit, you will stay in a bigger suite that specially equipped for babies.

You’ll receive a Newborn Package that includes all the things you’ll need when you start to take care of the baby.

You will receive PGD services, which helps eliminate poor embryos and also allows for gender selection.

A pediatrician will see your child every day, and there is also a 24/7 hotline for English-speaking Pediatricians, who can come visit you at any time if necessary.

Regardless of how far along the surrogate is, if the case of miscarriage, abortion, or death of child, the agency will take care of the cost of paying the surrogate and finding a new one.

In case your baby is born premature, the agency will pay all medical fees regardless.

If you have twins, there is no additional fee.

You will have 9am – 6pm nursery and babysitting services available to you every day.

You may attend the birth of your baby.

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Marmo

Commercial surrogacy is legal in the Ukraine. But it is only available to married heterosexual couples!! Couples also have to demonstrate that they require surrogacy. They have to provide suitable evidence such as the absence or deformation of the uterus to include adhesions or scar tissue. Risk to the health of the mother or potential child through pregnancy or by providing evidence of having 4 failed IVF attempts. The IP of a child born through surrogacy are considered to be biological parents from the moment of conception. They are specifically named as biological parents in the birth certificate without any mentioning of the surrogate mother. Importantly the gestational surrogate has no legal claim over the child!! Also no specific permission from any regulatory body is required. However written informed consent of all parties participating in the surrogacy program is mandatory! Unlike the US and Canada, babies born through surrogacy in Ukraine do not gain Ukrainian citizenship. In brief, the process goes like this # Search; confirmation of a surrogate mother, matching process. Waiting time depends on the type of contact. Stimulation; synchronisation stage (about 2 weeks). The cycle of egg donor or the biological mother is synchronised with the cycle of a surrogate mother. According to your contract you have to follow all doctors instruction. In case of self-treatment or violation of the treatment protocol, the clinic may cancel the cycle and terminate the contract. Fertilization day, embryo transfer – the 2nd visit. In case the biological mother undergoes hormonal stimulation and is being prepared for egg retrieval, the second visit may take up to 10 days. If we are talking about surrogacy using own eggs it is not recommended to leave the same day. Flying the following day is fine.The rules for sperm donation are similar as for the initial consultation – a man needs to abstain from ejaculation from 3 to 5 days before. After fertilisation the embryo development is monitored by embryology unit. The embryo transfer takes place on the 5th day. You will receive the protocol of embryo cultivation and transfer within 3 working days after the embryo transfer. HCG test, pregnancy confirmation. The first ultrasound scan is carried out in 2 weeks after the positive HCG test by the doctor in charge of the program. The report will be send the same or the next day after the check. Pregnancy monitoring. Delivery. Obtaining of the birth certificate.

Also starting from 01.09.2019 the price for the VIP package with the clinic we've been with, will be 64900 EUR. The waiting time for the 1st att at a VIP package will be 4 months, and at a Standard package - up to 1 year.

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