And the battle goes on .......: During the early... - ICUsteps

ICUsteps

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And the battle goes on .......

Pandysgirls profile image
15 Replies

During the early days I posted many times my husband caught COVID end of March last year and was admitted to hospital on the 7th April with breathing difficulties . Everything that could go wrong for him did ! It was like for everyday we had a reasonable update we then had 3 or 4 days that was frightening .

In total my husband spent 9 and a half weeks in hospital 6 of those in ICU , in that time he had 3 infections one of those was his heart , kidneys failing so hence a time of being filtered , liver problems , blown lung , 2 chest drains , a trachy fitting , and to top it all a stroke !

By the time we got him home he’d lost nearly 4 stone ( he wasn’t a big man to start with ! ) but we are lucky we had him home .... but it doesn’t end there , so I wanted to share what I now know or have learned ..

In the beginning I thought the more I knew the better I’d cope , that’s not true ! Google which was my constant companion can scare more than console . Finding this site with people that know / understand is far better place to put your thoughts questions . And when you get your relative home it’s only the start of your story I dare say a lot of people in the same position as myself with trying to get your loved one stronger , putting weight back on , building stamina , confidence , and the best possible health they can have .

But the battle goes on , I can’t watch a news story without reliving all that we went through , I get flash backs of waiting for my 1 daily update knowing that thousands of people are going through that now ! The first few months my husband was home I couldn’t sleep , I had nightmares , I had the fear that I couldn’t get him back to a near normal , I was a wound up spring !

Understanding how worrying and frightening it is to anyone that has relatives in ICU for whatever reason the best advice you can have is what I’ve seen on this sight many times ... you must look after yourself , you must be the best you can be mentally physically to help your loved ones on the next stage ,

I wish the best possible outcome to everyone going through this believe me I feel your pain , but the positivity I can leave you with 7 months on my husband is back to normal weight , he’s working full time ! and apart from the fact he will be on tablets for the rest of his life , he is virtually back to normal !

To everyone that’s on here looking and wanting hope and answers I just want to say be kind to yourself , take care of yourself , because when you get your loved ones home ... that’s when your battle starts .

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Pandysgirls profile image
Pandysgirls
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15 Replies
FamilyHistorian profile image
FamilyHistorian

Good to hear from you. Conversations tend to be patient centred forgetting the trauma suffered by the relatives. You have taken the first step by opening up the conversation and talking about the consequences for you. My wife suffers flash backs but won’t talk about them.

I had 10 sessions of CBT which enabled me to build strategies for dealing with issues. One is non avoidance so I deliberately watch programs like ambulance and the various hospital documentaries. I can watch these now without flash backs but that doesn’t mean to say there is no emotion.

I’m not too sure if you went to the relatives group with ICUStepsChester ( @sepsur ) that’s on a Tuesday at 2000 on zoom if not you may find that will help.

Sepsur profile image
Sepsur

Great post @Pandysgirls

If you or your husband ever feel like lending your experience to a support group - please have a look at facebook.com/groups/2349652... 😀🙏

And - without scaring people with loved ones in a coma, the assumption is that the real battle takes place when your loved one is asleep - my being awake in ICU just opened up a new set of issues as did moving down onto the wards & discharging home. That’s why we say conserve your energy - you’ll need it for the long haul

Pandysgirls profile image
Pandysgirls in reply to Sepsur

Sw-sure thank you for your message I’m not sure how to reply to a private message but thank you very much x

Sepsur profile image
Sepsur in reply to Pandysgirls

On a mobile - the reply box runs along the bottom of the screen

Pandysgirls profile image
Pandysgirls in reply to Sepsur

Thank you very much for your pm will def keep that in mind as you can tell tech not my strong point ! Stay safe xxx

Sepsur profile image
Sepsur in reply to Pandysgirls

🤣

Delel profile image
Delel

Thanks for sharing your story. What tablets is he on to if you don't mind me asking?

Pandysgirls profile image
Pandysgirls in reply to Delel

Hi Delel , no I don’t mind you asking he is on bisoprolol , apixaban , and ramipril , but this is a man that was taking no medication before COVID X

Delel profile image
Delel in reply to Pandysgirls

What are they for?

Pandysgirls profile image
Pandysgirls

Blood pressure , blood thinners and a heart murmur , all from COVID

Amazing so happy for you!

PeterJu profile image
PeterJu

What good and lovely words. Well done in sharing your perspective and regards to your husband, Pete 👍

Pandysgirls profile image
Pandysgirls in reply to PeterJu

Thank you Peter xx

I am really glad to have read this today. While my mom does not/did not have COVID she definitely has had a lot of strength loss and extreme fatigue due to her time in ICU. She's currently in a rehab facility where she is working on building strength in her body and also in her respiratory muscles because she has 'failed' weaning from a trach multiple times. She's only been in the facility for 4 weeks, but seems to have made some good progress.

Hearing that it has been multiple months, but that ultimately he was able to rehab back to close to normal has made my day.

Ferham profile image
Ferham

Just amazing, I love the wound up spring - I'm still like it some days, we are still not out of the woods but it's such an accurate description of our journey . xx

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