Mom off sedation but not responding

[jlkce]

Hello, I found this site yesterday and feel it’s been the only one I can find any comfort in.

My mom (81, does not have COVID) was having dinner on the 23rd and started choking. We tried the Heimlich maneuver and managed to remove some but then my mom just collapsed. We couldn’t find a pulse and couldn’t tell if she was breathing so we called 112 and started CPR immediately until the ambulance came and took over. They intubated her and she did have a very weak pulse when they connected her, we were all in such panic.

Now she has been in the ICU since Wednesday night, they cleared her lungs and put her on the ventilator.

On Thursday morning they were going to start easing the sedation to see how she was doing, and by evening she was able to breathe on her own with the ventilator.

They also scanned brain for damage from hitting the table with her head when she collapsed. It was fine. The doctors were satisfied with her progress when I spoke to them on Friday, but my mom was still not waking up/ reacting to stimuli.

Yesterday we finally were able to visit, and the doctor seemed much more grim, but I guess they are only explaining things they the way they are.

My mom’s eyes are opened and her eyes are moving, but back and forth. They sometimes seemed to linger a bit when we got into her view.

My father and I both thought she had a reaction to our voices when we arrived. Her eyes seemed to widen as with surprise.

They are going to do a tracheotomy on her next and also a MRI (they needed signatures first) to check for possible brain damage, which I’m dreading.

It was so horrible to see my mother so helpless. She was moving her arms a little, and it seems she was stretching her body 2-3 times. As in pushing down.

I’m so scared for her and have no idea what to do, other than talk to her and hope she stays strong. We’re going back today to see her today. I’m so, so, so hoping it’s just taking her some time to come around.

If anyone has experienced something similar, please let me know.

[LeopardGecko]

I don't have a similar story but I know from my husband being in ICU for about 3 months, it's good to keep talking to them.

It might be worth printing out some photos that you could take and leave there with her (the staff might be able to stick them up somewhere so that she can see them) and maybe take a radio so that they can play her music that she likes.

I hope things start to look more positive soon x

[jlkce in reply to LeopardGecko]

Thank you, I left a teddy bear with her yesterday and I’m putting together music she likes for her to listen to. She looked a little better yesterday but still unresponsive. Her eyes are open and she seems to linger on us sometimes. A tear rolled down her cheek when we were speaking to her, which broke our hearts. We’re going back today. Please keep keep my mom in your thoughts. And thank you again.

[FamilyHistorian]

As @LeopardGecko says you can try things that will trigger her memory. I wasn’t a covid patient but sedated/ventilated for nearly 2 months. I also had a trachy. I was a long time coming round. The ICU docs accepted it would take time - not so easy for my family. I came home mid March

[jlkce in reply to FamilyHistorian]

Thank you so much, this gives me fresh hope. We are going back today and she will get an MRI this week, hopefully soon but they’re backed up due to the holidays.

[Kedivarim in reply to jlkce]

My friend (62) was on a ventilator from the end of July this year. They took her off it at approximately the end of September. She didn't come round for weeks. We were all worried sick that she never would. The first signs of her waking were she 'said' she wanted to die (not by speaking, but, by silently memoing). Then she cried. She was agitated for a few days. Eventually, she started to wake properly. She's still in the hospital, but, she's able to eat well (we thought she'd never eat again), she loved Christmas dinner! She's reading, texting, face timing, etc. I'm praying this will be your mum when her body is ready X

[jlkce in reply to Kedivarim]

Thank you so much.

[Sepsur]

The staff put up photos and spoke about my family all the time. They also put on my favourite radio station. Of course, when I was ill, families could visit which all helped to orientate me after the sedation. It still took quite a few days

[jlkce in reply to Sepsur]

We went to visit my mom today and she looked like she was trying to speak or swallow - I’m not sure. It could be wishful thinking but I’m hoping that she is just slowly coming back. We brought her music, a long playlist with relaxing music by her favorite composer. She is scheduled for an MRI on Wednesday. We’re all incredibly nervous, praying that it won’t show any permanent damage. Thank you all for your replies. It’s comforting in these nerve wracking times. I’m also very happy for all of you who have yourself, and whose loved ones, have recovered. 🙏

[jlkce]

We just got the results of her MRI and unfortunately she has severe hypoxia brain damage. The outlook is pretty bad according to the doctor - I was so stunned & upset that I didn’t say or ask as much as I maybe should have. She isn’t in any pain. I feel so sorry for her. We talked to her and held her hands. The doctor said the brain stem is what’s keeping everything going, like breathing, and eyes... leg and arm movements. They said she was ok otherwise, but in a vegetative state. Now we are hoping for a miracle. If my mother stays “stable”, the doctor did talk about next steps, like weaning off vent/breath on her own & moving to neurology... which is a glimmer of hope? My sister, who unfortunately lives quite far away, is going to email the doctor and get more details, which she’ll also understand much better since she’s a former paramedic. But we’re hoping against all odds for a miracle and will keep hoping and praying. Day by day. But again, thank you all - this is a tremendous help.