Facetime refused... by herself!: I'm kinda sad... - ICUsteps

ICUsteps

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Facetime refused... by herself!

Marcita profile image
Marcita
•6 Replies

I'm kinda sad today... The nurse who takes care of my mom said my mom didn't want to video call us yesterday... I wonder why 😔

I was looking forward to speak to her again and she didn't want... she has started to eat and drink slowly and she's taking care of a ulcer that has developed on her back. She's not moving much yet... nephrologist team are keeping an eye on her kidneys.

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Marcita profile image
Marcita
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Is she suffering from delirium? I’ve read/heard stories that people can suffer from delirium to different extents and she might not be acting like herself. It’s so good that shes eating/drinking a little. Maybe she will feel a little better and video call next time.

Sepsur profile image
Sepsur

Your poor Mom may not be feeling herself at present - ICUdelirium is very confusing for everyone because we have moments of lucidity - the next moment you a launched back into some weird other place. I was also dog tired when I woke - even simple communication was exhausting.

RockRunner profile image
RockRunner

It’s hard when we desperately want to see them but some days aside from delirium they are just too tired and not up to it. It could also be she is more aware and concerned about you seeing her looking less than her best. Great news she is eating and drinking tho x

PeterJu profile image
PeterJu

Hi Marcita. I was in hospital 16 days with covid. Obviously I don't know your Mum's motivation. In my case as a husband and father I do know that I wouldn't have made video calls for the following reasons. Firstly I was exhausted and forgetful; both made any planned activity difficult to reach.. Secondly, I would not wanted to have upset them by seeing me in gowns, with hospital masks etc. Finally had they got upset, it would have upset me too and I wouldn't want that for anyone. I am sure your mum loves you very much. take care, Peter

VickyC1982 profile image
VickyC1982

Try not to take things personally. I was only ever pleased to see my Dad when I was in hospital. I was so confused and emotional that I tried to punch my husband one day and refused to see him xx

BBDEBS profile image
BBDEBS

Please know this will pass. Just seeing people and trying to hold a conversation for the first 2 weeks was exhausting. I cried a lot, I had an allergic reaction to an antibiotic and all my skin went black and peeled off, I was in such a bad way I didn't want company, just my husband, no friends, nobody else. Sure it was nice at times but 5 mins then please leave. My husband would just sit with me, top up my telly card, share the screen with me, and just be there, not talking, but helping me out the bed when I could, washing me, wiping my ar*e, but not saying much at all. Sometimes just knowing my mum had called me was enough, the nurses would tell me she rang, and I was happy then.

Holding a convo when you are so spaced, exhausted, woken every 2 hours for meds, obs, weighing, dialysis, it does take it out of you. But she will get better and you will speak again soon xx

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