Advice

[Gerard71]

Hello, my name is Gerard. I recently had sepsis following a urinary infection I didn't know I had. I woke up one Sunday evening about 6 weeks ago with dozens of ghosts in my flat. Men women and children. And dogs. They seemed so real. I wasn't scared but I can't stop thinking about a few of the "children" who crept into my bed for a cuddle before they disappeared in sparkles. I was convinced my mother had died. I fell down the stairs at 4.00 am and knocked myself unconscious. Found by a neighbour 3 hours later. I'm really struggling with the fatigue and lethargy and the blue days. I try to go to work every day but it's difficult. I just wanted to put this on here to see if anyone can give any advice. I was arguing with bags of clothes apparently, at the hospital and wet myself because a llama was using the toilet! Anyway, thanks in advance for any info you can give. G

[Sepsur]

Have a look at this guide

icusteps.org/guide

& the one on ICUdelerium. I had many ‘visions’ which were extremely disconcerting- & to be frank - I laid all that to rest pretty sharpish. What become my overriding concern was to get back to normal. ICU acquired weakness takes ages to get over. When I was discharged, getting dressed in the morning was a chore. What you are experiencing & have experienced, is pretty common for patients coming through critical care - you are not alone. Oh - because my blood pressure was so low, if I did anything too strenuous or quick, I’d pass out p@&s myself - fun of recovery. Stick to your physiotherapy programme & good luck. Is there an ICUsteps meeting near you?

[Gerard71 in reply to Sepsur]

Thank you for your message. I appreciate it. My blood pressure is fine. I get the getting dressed in morning thing. Or, in fact , the getting out of bed thing. I lost a stone in hospital and the days prior, so trying to get back to my normal weight of 12.5 stone. I had so many ghosts. 6 old women in my kitchen, one of whom was doing the dishes before she sparkled off, amongst others. I just find it really difficult to get what was reality at the time, out of my head. It makes me quite emotional when I think about it or talk to anyone about it. I find that people I speak to don't really understand. And as you're being very honest, I had a girlfriend stay over a couple of weeks after leaving hospital and wet the bed with her in it. I don't have any therapy. But she may need some.

[Sepsur in reply to Gerard71]

Hi Gerald - best thing is always to lock your posts - look for little symbol in corner of your original post.

ICU delirium is a weird phenomenon - it felt very ‘real’ - full of mayhem, violence, bereavement etc - if it doesn’t go away, seek help.

[Sepsur in reply to Gerard71]

icusteps.org/assets/files/b...

[Gerard71 in reply to Sepsur]

Thank you so much. I was aggressive, pulling out tubes, talking nonsense etc. I remember some of it but not a lot. I remember deciding to go for a walk naked, at 2.00am and being stopped by the two nurses and then a great big security bloke who I decided not to try to punch as he lifted me up with one arm and took me back to bed. Once again thank you.

[sarahjane12]

Hi Gerard71 hope your feeling better soon I was in icu in 2016 with sepsis,pneumonia and life threatening asthma it takes a long time to feel better but u will get there am suffering with night mares flash backs not nice at all talking about it helps and maybe a visit back to icu to have a look around really helped me good luck

[Kristian]

Hi Gerard, that's all pretty much par for the course. With respect to the fatigue, just take your time. It will take quite a while for you to recover. Just be patient and try and do a bit of exercise everyday. You will eventually recover your fitness.

[Gerard71]

Thank you both Kristian and Sarahjane. I too have been having nightmares and waking myself up swearing at inanimate objects. I too get flashbacks and there are things I saw that I want to erase from my mind but it's difficult. I don't mind all the biopsies and other procedures, it's the tiredness which I can't stand. Sleeping until 2.00pm etc. Saw my GP and he prescribed me zopiclone, sleeping pills. Obviously I need to sleep more and feel more tired!!! I commute to central London everyday which is a struggle but anyway, thank you all for taking time to reply. It's good to talk with people who get it.