Recent Induced comma and just need to share!!

[LewiSophie]

Hi all, I am home a week after nipping to hospital for a minor tooth infection clear up and woke up 3 days later in ICU and seem to just need to write things down somewhere where others may be able to understand me. My brilliant hubby is still being amazing but he doesn't like to keep going over things as often as I do because he is obviously suffering his own traumas from the other side of the journey, which I totally understand.

I have read lots about the vivid dreams I am still experiencing which, although quiet disturbing, I understand why they are still happening. Must admit however some are so bizarre they have made us laugh so hard!

I also agree with people about the disorientating day you are bought out of sedation (for me this was Tuesday morning ICU day shift change over) and then suddenly find yourself wheeled on to a loud busy ward in time for lunch. That day was one of the hardest I have trouble with at the moment, laying there like a zombie, hardly able to lift my arms, not wanting to talk, other patient's visitors staring at you and then being pulled out of bed to walk to the loo before you pee yourself (my choice as I hate the idea of bed pans). I strongly believe there should be a transition ward for ICU patients for this day, so that once you hit the main wards you are at least a little more with it!

I came home on Friday morning and feel okay but stupidly forgot that I hadn't eaten properly for over a fortnight (wisdom tooth extraction started all of this the week before). Had a simple bowl of pasta and cheese - a favourite - but pre ICU/illness quantity. Big mistake! Gonna be gross now, I had begun suffering what we have nicknamed peepoo that morning and sadly at 3 am found myself still throwing up the whole contents of my stomach, whilst noticing an accident happening around my feet! Sadness, embarrassment, disgust, shame, just a few feelings I went through at that moment in time, but having time to talk to my lovely hubby (while he lovingly moped the floor), why did I feel this? It's not my fault the drugs need to leave my body, it's not even been a week yet and I did nothing to make this situation appear, I just had a tooth extraction! I have now just experienced another very vivid dream and for the first time in probably 50 years, wet the bed. So, I'm up, having a coffee and biscuit (little and often strategy seems to be working), writing this and feeling nothing negative about myself at all - heyho just another thing to go through!

Thank you taking the time to read my waffle. I think I'm going to be fine and was very lucky to only have suffered an induced coma for a few days compared to most other people on here. Just wanted to share, let others discover (as I have in the past 24 hrs) that these things are normal, doctors and nurses should actually be placed in a comma themselves maybe before they can become fully qualified to care for us and that your body has to have time to recover, however good you think you are feeling!

One final point, the NHS is absolutely brilliant!

Start time 10:00 am 3rd February - Finish time 1:pm Friday 9th Friday

Hundreds of people saved my life, cared for my life, listened to me, wiped away my tears, held my hand, measured my wee, made me drinks and food, cleaned the environment, helped me eat again, checked I was safe to walk, took my blood um teem times, replaced numerous canulars, washed and dressed me, smiled as they passed me (one nurse even stopped and re-set my drip alarm as she passed outside x ray - each and every one of them are priceless.

I hope this might help someone somewhere because I have found this hour very cathartic xx

[comadreams]

Hi there, good to know you're recovering quickly I couldn't agree more about there should be a transitional ward for post ICU and post coma patients and that doctors and nurses should actually be placed in a comma themselves maybe before they can become fully qualified to care for us and that your body has to have time to recover, however good you think you are feeling! (I would replace the word 'normal' with common.) And I repeat big ups to the nurses who are indeed fantastic, caring people. I have been researching coma dream experiences and personally believe they are caused by the sedative drugs used to induce coma all of which are powerfully psychotropic and potentially hallucinogenic. I'm collecting coma dream stories for a book if you have the time, strength and inclination to describe your dreams please message me some of those impressions and recollections.

Best wishes for your continued recovery, David ([e-mail])

[LewiSophie in reply to comadreams]

Hi David - yes I will happily share some with you in a while but might stick to the funny ones, as I am trying to put the dark and scary ones out of my mind asap.

[comadreams in reply to LewiSophie]

Thankyou It would be good to hear some funny coma dreamshaving heard and experienced so many scary ones, please share. the funniest of mine I can remember was acompanying a talking, Baba like elephant on a speaking tour to Australia to entertain children. I semed to be his tour manager. The elephantwas also a king of elephants and wore a large golden crown, he was on a global peace mission to save the environment and could tell jokes, later he lead a parade of government ministers including Barack Obama nd the Pope to celebrate World Peace Day. At one point he got slightly cross because the ship I got for himwas too small and might sink from his weight.

[comadreams in reply to comadreams]

I'm reminded now he was a bit likethe Indian elephant god Ganesh.

[Lacemaker]

I can relate to your experience as I have been there myself. I agree that there should be a transition ward because the main ward staff DO NOT UNDERSTAND. I was told to walk to the loo on my first day on the general ward despite being weak from massive muscle loss, (I had loss 3 stone in weight) and left to my own devices.

Wishing you all the best in your recovery.

[comadreams in reply to Lacemaker]

Absolutely! We shouldpush for transition wards (Don't know who we would petition) with trained staff.My experience in thegeneral ward (although I still praise the dedication and caring of nurses everywhere) was really just an uneccessarily protracted extension of the ICU coma nightmares. You are correct, the main ward staff DO NOT UNDERSTAND. It's commonly reported amongst other "emergence phenomena" that patients accuse nurses of not being real nurses at all but actors playing a part, I had that experience myself.

[LewiSophie in reply to comadreams]

Thank you for your thoughts about a transition ward. Unbelievably, I went to my practice nurse today for a wound clean and she had actually been an ICU patient herself - my hubby said the things she said to me were so true she could not have made it up. She totally agrees with her professionals experiencing some of the effects of the drugs (maybe not as far as a coma though) and that a transition ward is actually a great idea!!.

[comadreams in reply to LewiSophie]

LOL! going as far as the coma experience for professionals might be overdoing it, we'd wind up with a ward staffed by people that are already as mental as the patients but transition ward definitely

[comadreams in reply to comadreams]

I'm writing a book, likely titled simply COMA and already have a publisher, Austin Macauley, interested but there's still a long way to go to what they consider a "complete manuscript" 500/600 pages, 90,000 plus words. The mid section will be composed entirely of different coma survivors memories of the dream world they entered starting with my own. I have eight or ten dreamers experiences logged and would like to add more. Perhaps, if you're able and willing to, you would consider contributing your own? I'm especially interested in the commonalities and parallels between different peoples dream experiences. For instance the impression of having been abducted and held against their will by some nefarious agency or other is almost universal, CIA mind control experiments, that sort of thing, aliens are common, ghosts,angels, spirits, both good and evil are frequently featured, one chap thinks he was parachuted into some kind of 'Get me out of here' style TV show or something like the movie The Truman Show. Others describe being in a different country they had never previously been to or even thought about, or even being transported to another planet. Time dilation and expansion are frequently reported as are ideas of having slipped between or visited other dimensions. The next part of the book deals with consciousness and 'reality' Out of body and near death experiences and the last section with the numerous drugs administered to induce and maintain coma. I'm hoping to finish it with some input from the professionals, anestheologists, doctors, nurses, etc. Anyway, before I write the whole book in this little reply box I'd better wrap it up. If you can help with the project please e-mail me at [e-mail] and we can continue the dialogue. Cheers and again, congratulations!. BTW, the intention of the book is to inform and educate both survivors and their loved ones and to reassure them they are not alone and especially that they are not crazy. Bye now, David. I'm writing a book, likely titled simply COMA and already have a publisher, Austin Macauley, interested but there's still a long way to go to what they consider a "complete manuscript" 500/600 pages, 90,000 plus words. The mid section will be composed entirely of different coma survivors memories of the dream world they entered starting with my own. I have eight or ten dreamers experiences logged and would like to add more. Perhaps, if you're able and willing to, you would consider contributing your own? I'm especially interested in the commonalities and parallels between different peoples dream experiences. For instance the impression of having been abducted and held against their will by some nefarious agency or other is almost universal, CIA mind control experiments, that sort of thing, aliens are common, ghosts,angels, spirits, both good and evil are frequently featured, one chap thinks he was parachuted into some kind of 'Get me out of here' style TV show or something like the movie The Truman Show. Others describe being in a different country they had never previously been to or even thought about, or even being transported to another planet. Time dilation and expansion are frequently reported as are ideas of having slipped between or visited other dimensions. The next part of the book deals with consciousness and 'reality' Out of body and near death experiences and the last section with the numerous drugs administered to induce and maintain coma. I'm hoping to finish it with some input from the professionals, anestheologists, doctors, nurses, etc. Anyway, before I write the whole book in this little reply box I'd better wrap it up. If you can help with the project please e-mail me at [e-mail] and we can continue the dialogue. Cheers and again, congratulations!. BTW, the intention of the book is to inform and educate both survivors and their loved ones and to reassure them they are not alone and especially that they are not crazy. Bye now, David.

[anne16hall]

Oh my! I'm so glad you wrote this and it was cathartic for you; the few minutes I took to read it have been for me too! I'm really glad you're recovering well, what an unexpected experience for you. I agree and empathise with all you say. I too found all the people who cared for me in ICU in Jan/Feb 2017 amazing and have nothing but gratitude to the NHS but there are small and not expensive, or particularly time consuming things, that could have improved my experience greatly both pre, during and post ICU. The sedative drugs certainly caused me to have odd dreams and to be fearful that someone would disconnect my ventilator - have discussed these and my whole ICU experience with my daughters endlessly too, they've very patient!! Your husband sounds lovely. I'm a widow and have really missed mine this time as he was similarly fantastic when I had Miller Fisher Syndrome 30 years ago (not in ICU then). This was my second and worse bout but I'm OK now. Thanks so much for posting this - must get on now with Monday morning chores. xx

[Mijmijkey74 in reply to anne16hall]

I was in ICU/Critical Care Jan/Feb 2018! Lol What date did you go in? I went in 17/18th Jan. And was made to leave hospital way to early by an incompetent doctor whom had refused to treat me, and lost my ICU file. There should definitely be a transitional ward for patients out of comas. I was carted off to a ward and couldn't do anything for myself, muscles had wasted away completely, couldn't walk, couldn't use my hands, would flop forwards onto my legs in bed, or flop out of bed hanging out of it unable to rectify myself because no strength and muscles wasted. Had to relearn a lot again. My wrists were bent under just floppy and useless, couldn't hold things, couldn't brush hair, teeth. Could do nothing and nurses on ward were horrendous, abusive and horrendous and many were shocked when they learnt I was a ICU coma patient, they just assumed me stupid or being delibrately difficult because they weren't informed. I'd died for a few seconds then been expected to die a further two times. I wasn't expected to survive. My time on that normal ward was horrendous and scary, far far worse than my illness, coma, time in ICU, strange surreal eerie but wonderful coma dreams and expected death. That ward was where the nightmares began for real. Those nurses were monstrous, not nurses because they care about people, but because they like to inflict pain and watch people suffer. I'm still struggling now, but baby steps and I'll get there eventually. I weighed just under 4 stone when I came out of my coma, it's taken me up until this August/September 2019 to get to 6 stone, and get the muscle back in my thighs. I had to wear thick woolly tights under my jeans to bulk me out and keep them up, even during the very hot summer we had last year. One of the problems I've been left with is voices in my head. Random nonsensical chatter, random words suddenly shouted loud in my head " not my own minds voice " that startle me and make me jump or wake me from sleep. Or the eerie voice I hear that whispers my name creepily. That freaks me completely out. Never had these voices prior to my illness or coma. Anybody else have the same or similar?

[stevet11753]

I wonder if there's variation in treating of ICU patients across the NHS. I was in ICU about 31 days, then a week in HDU before being transferred to a ward for seriously ill patients for five weeks. I had massive muscle loss and could not even sit up in bed without assistance. The whole time I was in HDU and on the ward I received daily physio until I could walk again on my own: I wasn't allowed to leave hospital until I could climb a flight of stairs without assistance. This appears to be very different from the experience of yourself and others treated by the NHS.

[comadreams in reply to stevet11753]

I think you're right about variation, I was in ICU and induced coma for a little over five weeks. in gneral ward, like you, I had massive muscle loss and could not even sit up in bed without assistance. The whole time I was on the general ward I received daily physio until I could walk again on my own: I wasn't allowed to leave hospital until I could climb a flight of stairs without assistance. The physio gals were wonderful but would not accept that I was Godzilla and therefor didn't need their help. LOL!

[Sepsur]

I was in ICU for 90 days - the last 30 days were in a more reduced form of ‘ICU’ - almost like HDU - the move down to the wards was a shock - even though I remained in isolation for the 4 months I was in hospital. Wish you well in your on going recovery

[sheila21]

Hi LewisSophie. Your post made me smile. I had food poisoning which brought on kidney failure and sepsis, organ failure and coma. Only 4 days but long enough to terrify my family. I smiled because I have so many poo stories you wouldn't believe. Sounds like you are on the road to recovery. I still have some rough days but generally am getting better. My husband talks about it as he had horrors of his own to get out of his system.

I was fortunate that I stayed in the ICU for a couple of days coming round gently with amazing staff then was put into a side ward for a the weekend. Amazing surroundings and staff. Keep safe. Xx