Soo upset

Feel so so sad my grandad died this morning ge had a fall few week ago and ended up hacing bleed on brain wgich caused a stroke and basicly left him with brain damage he was deteiratin rapidly so dr decided last night stopp all treatment n he died 3am this morning absolutly devastated he and my gran lived in hyde and my gran cant travel far so its lookin at the min his duneral might take place at denton cemetry if so dobt know how to deal with that as my sons funeral was held there so think would b way to much but dnt want to upset family especially my mum if i dont attend but it will have serious affects on me if i do attend help any advice xx

12 Replies

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  • Hi kez

    Welcome to the group and I am so sorry to read about the Piss of your grandad are thoughts are with you. Regarding going to the funeral is it all taking place in one place or two if two go to the first bit and give excuses if not talk to the family o am sure they will understand . The other option is to follow the procession to the church and stay out side so they now you are there

    I am really sorry

    Paddy

  • Hi Kez-- so sorry to hear of your loses .2012 seams to be off to a bad start for many of us here.its a tough pill to swallow, lots of heart ack. i think you will have to muster all your strength , and attend. you son and your grandad are reunited in a much better place . no suffering ,no pain. you have to look at others that will be looking for your comfort and presence and reasurance that evey thing will be ok.if you dont attend ,it may be something that you may come to regrett.. i say this because i have been thru this three times this year already. its a real loss. hope you are ok . hope this helps with your decision . thinking of you ----------- jet

  • I am sorry for your loss, its always horrid when we lose anyone, I know when I lost my dad (16 years ago now,) I have since had other family (including grandad & sister) & friends cremated at the same place but knew my family/friends wanted my support so I attended & I feel it helped me be stronger plus I visit 'the tree' where my Dad was placed when there.

    Good luck with whichever decision you make xx

  • So sorry to hear your sad news. I know how your feel about the funneral but believe me if you can find the strength to attend funeral it will help.

    Sometimes we imagine something is going to be worse than it will actually be.

    My babies Hanna and Carl (twins) and Jack where stillborn and the funeral was a chester crematorium I always said I could never go back there but I had to in 2010 for my husbands funeral, It felt right that they all went from the same place.

    Look after yourself and allow yourself time to grieve for your grandad and

    son.

    sharon xx

  • Hi kez so sorry to hear about your grandad so sad ESP as a fall caused the head injury and bleed. You are so young to be going through this ESP on top of your health issues. As said I feel the same the thought of revisiting those memories of the pain u still feel of losing your son must be terrible & probably your fears will not be as bad as you are thinking now.

    I just hope your family will recognise how difficult it will be for you & support you with what ever decision you come to. Sending you big hugs hun Kathy xx

  • Hi kez

    I am so sorry to hear or of your loss hon. Sending you big but gentle hugs, hang in their.

    I too have had to attend funerals where my little ones went to rest. It hurts but i know there are some special people taking care of my little ones and take some comfort in that. I go to their sometimes when struggling and spend time where its calm and quiet. My nan who was my best friend and like a mum to me is their and I dunno maybe i'm crazy but I go talk to her and ask her if all is ok. Tell her my troubles too.

    With love to you and all your family sheena xxxxxx

  • Hugs Kez.

    The others have said what I would have said.

    My heart goes out to you during this sad time.

  • So sorry for your loss. x

  • Sorry to read of your loss. Try and remember the fun good times, that will help.

  • I am thinking about you, be good to yourself

  • So sorry for you loss, I lost a dear friend recently to similar circumstances after a fall at his home. It is never easy to get over a loss, especially when it comes from something as insignificant as a fall. Take care of yourself, and do what's best for you.

  • Thank you everyone and after speaking with my mum and partner all think its best if i dont go and pay my respects later as im not mentally stable enough at min but i do go cemetry just cant handle funerals i freak out so prob best for all but does ma head in cant even say good bye proppa but i agrew wid u all hell b lookin after my little boy now and im givin my mum a crusifix put in his casket as my son had one so in my own way that will help them find eachother its nicce to know there are so many nice ppl out there ure all diamonds n very helpfull at these times sorry ive not been on for while just been collecting my thoufhts my fella richie is gettin me 2 little puddy cats lol as i loce animals they seem help me when im strugglin gosh past few yr have been so tough i dnt knw where im comin or going seems i always land bk in this dark place n lose my self but hopefully my mental health will improve soon i just need a break i guess but being on ere really does help i c u all as friends something i have never really had thx guys xxxx

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