Reading Berkshire.. Is anyone out there who wants a companion and not a hook up, why is it so hard to find the loyal old fashioned type!

Since being diagnosed I have found my search for my life companion harder than ever

I am a 36 year old, proud to be gay, non scene, poz for 6 years, yet to start meds man I'm told I'm a handsome devil

I have looked at many positive dating sites and some seem classy and the guys sincere. Only to then discover the same guys are also on Apps like Grindr looking for unprotected casual Sex and being quite crude. I'm not judging each to their own but it's not for me personally

I dated Neg guys who knew from the start my status, only to be told later down the road that "I don't think I can do this anymore, I miss oral without condoms" or "I worry I'll get it and my family will react badly to you" as examples

I'm an old fashioned sort I believe in a love that my grandparents had Devotion , loyalty, commitment and respect ... And awareness and mindfulness that all lasting relationships take work!

I'm not past it, I don't feel past it... But the years seem to be passing faster as I age and I don't want to spend the last years of my youth wasting them on men who have no idea how to commit or clear and certain what they want in their life

I don't have a lot to offer regarding the material things But I have a heart of gold and live an independant life I don't need anyone to look after me I want that person who compliments me and will have my back knowing I have his

Becoming positive has only reinforced my want to settle. Where are the likeminded? im not saying they don't exist, maybe I need to go specsavers. I struggle to find anyone talking about monogamy or settling down crystal clearly

I am happy single... I'm not happy at the idea of growing old alone I want to have a loving relationship and I'm not ashamed or embarrased to say that I occasionally experience a strong wave of loneliness and sadness about it

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9 Replies

  • Hi. Wow refreshingly honest.

  • Hi mate,

    I'm from near Reading, have u been to TVPS they are very supportive.

    If you fancy meeting for a coffee let me know.

    I was diagnosed 2 years ago still not on meds.

    Let me know, take care.

  • Hi. I responded to your post about not being on meds. 6 years no meds here! Didn't have a good experience with TVPS to be honest. Hope your ok.

  • A really honest and well written piece. With that attitude I am sure you will find someone worthy of being with you.

    I agree the gay world, particularly when one is positive, can be lonely. It is sad but I have come to accept that is just the way it is.

  • Appreciate your response and your well wishes for me. Same to you Mr

  • I hear what you saying I'm 38 soon be 39 and been single for 5 years no one local wants me as a so called friend outed me

  • Outed you as positive?

    One thing I have learned from my diagnosis and being open about it, is who my friends really are and there level of maturity and loyalty.

    Best wishes to you. Thanks for sharing

  • Welcome I have found out who my true friends are here since my diagnosis and who are just people what gossip all the best to you

  • Hi, I'm Paul. Not quite round the corner but not exactly at the other side of the world either :)

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