Confusion over my fesr

[Missy_Ports68]

I attended an appointment yesterday with neuropsychiatry in relation to my intense fear of falling. My injury was caused by a fall backwards on the stairs. I do not recall the fall or the immediate aftermath so I do not know how or why I get this fear. It is particularly bad when I get to the top of stairs and I avoid using stairs when possible.The nurse just talked through a few issues, asked a few questions, didn't explore those issues and then recommended antidepressants! I don't want to take them, I want to understand why this is happening to me and how I can help myself when I have this fear.

Yes I'm depressed, my brain isn't able to think clearly, I'm stressed at home, work and the lack of support but I cannot see how taking antidepressants will help me long term. I feel no one is listening to me or am I not making myself clear, is it how I'm relating my issues that is causing confusion?

I am wondering if this is normal, am I feeling normal emotions and how do I make it stop.

My anger is terrible, my lack of patience is awful so I'm easily frustrated but I really hoped the appointment would explore my fears more and give me answers. I can get antidepressants from my GP, i don't need to see the neuropsychiatry dept for that.

On a plus side, I've finally been seen by a Neuropsychologist who has suggested I attend for cognitive testing and was very detailed in her approach to me. She suggested I may have an element of PTSD in relation to the fall but I am now left wondering if this would be a disagnosis or would the neuropsychiatry diagnose this. Im confused even more than usual. Does anyone know how I can help myself with my fears?

Thank you

Michelle

[Hidden]

Sounds like the psychiatry team has done the usual 'let's blame it on depression' routine. The good news is that you have a decent neuropsychologist and tests have been arranged.

Wait for the tests and see where that goes because you may be able get your fear dealt with too.

If what you are experiencing is PTSD then it's not depression.

I found that by putting all the problematic areas in a mental box I could get on with other aspects of life without too much anxiety (you may be anxious rather than depressed, they are very different).

The problem many people face is that they expect the Dr's etc to fix them but the reality is that they can't because they either don't know how to or there are no resources for expertise or realistic services. That's why they say it's down to depression, it's the medical get out of jail free card.

[Teazymaid]

hi missy p I’m struggling with a lot of the things you are saying and hoping when i eventually see a neuropsychologist they may help me understand me more as I’m not hoping for much of a change just clarity . As far a ptsd is concerned please get counselling as this can help you deal with it .. .. it is a very strange and confusing world living with a brain injury .. Sue x

[TreesMTBI in reply to Teazymaid]

I agree with Sue here. If there’s an element of PTSD why not self-refer to NHS Talking Therapies? I don’t know what your wait is going to be like for your neuropsych cognitive testing but may be worth going for that in the meantime. I personally have had a great experience with my local talking therapies team. They tailor the service to your needs, so you tell them about the PTSD and hopefully you’ll get to explore what’s going on with the therapist. A lot of the time, answers will come to you as you work through the sessions with your therapist. I tested for elements of PTSD with regard to my accident too, with my first NHS therapist who was brilliant. I’ve still to address it as had other pressing matters that were dealt with first. In my area, you get 12 sessions and then, as long as you wait 12 weeks, you can refer back into the service again. Hopefully the same where you are. This has been a life saver for me as I wait the long wait to see a neuropsychologist.

Good luck and yes, you are right to keep looking for answers.

All the best future health wishes to you.

Tx

[TreesMTBI in reply to TreesMTBI]

Oh and don’t be put off if you see ‘Anxiety and Depression’ written everywhere on your talking therapies team information- this is how they get their funding, as A&D are seen as such big problems to tackle in today’s society, but they really do help to address all sorts of psychological issues.

Tx

[Leaf100]

Hi MissyIt seems quite normal to me that you would fear falling , under the circumstances.

I feel an element of ptsd is quite usual when someone has been injured in an accident. And also because of how hard it is to get appropriate medical attention.

I found EMDR quite useful, the paddle based type. They either use their finger somehow or they use these little egg shaped thing they call paddles - you hold one in each hand and wear headphones that play a tone.

Before they play the tone, you think of a recurring thought or image. Generally they ask you to pick not the most scary, but a medium scary one. Then you pick a phrase off a list representing an association. You pick a number 1 to 10 representing how uncomfy ot makes you. Then you think of the image or phrase and they play the tone. After a bit you give another score, talk about what you felt. Eventually the number goes down. Then you pick an empowering phrase from a list, a number as ro how much you believe it...and the tome is played, score checked, until the replacing phrase is believable.

It can be hard to do. When I did the accident I was in my body was literally replaying the movements it went through.

Over the next couple or three weeks you keep processing. Perhaps you have some dreams.

Maybe it takes more than one session.

Not everyone can do it. I am not sure why.

The good thing is you don't have to talk about it much, and it doesn't go on for years.

I found it quite effective .

After, it kind of feels just like something that happened - you do remember how you felt and it just doesn't have the emotional charge it used to.

Your neuro psych may be trained. It is not an uncommon technique.

Anyway I would bring up ptsd with the helpful one and see what they say.

Leaf

[gr33nmind]

I used to always fall. I fell one morning badly breaking my nose, and getting another TBI. You see I was so doped on medication, that my drop foot easily caused falls. That day I vowed to get off all of it. No doctor would help me, so I water titrated myself. 4 meds in all. A year later, and I was off it all. I don't fall anymore. In fact I ran a 27 minute 5K in the summer of 2019, at age 49.

[Ideogram]

Hiya. I'm sorry to hear you're feeling like this. I don't have any solutions (I've still not been able to get anywhere near neuropsych) but just to say you're not alone; while I remember it, my accident was a completely freak one and it left me really scared of it recurring too (mine was from the car door slamming closed into my eye when I was leaning in the doorway, so I'm now really scared when opening the car door, passing close to other cars etc.) The woman at rehab referred me to being 'hypervigilant' - something came out of my periphery and changed my life, and I'm very aware of the consequences if it were to happen again, so she mentioned 'trauma' (the mental kind, not the door to the head kind). I hope you find some relief.

[sashaming1]

A (non neurological) Psychologist or meds.

[Nemo24]

It's understandable your fear when you are on stairs. I felt almost paranoid about falling for some time after my fall and really affected my confidence.One of my friends had a chat with me about antidepressants when my doctor introduced them. She made me think of ut as a temporary chemical imbalance which tablets might help. A few months in I am glad I took their advice. At basic level they have stopped the daily tears.

As I'm sure you have seen from others messages it is a marathon rather than a sprint and with bumps along the way. I live far more in the present now too. Hope this helps you have a think about tablets. what you want and uf they could help a bit. It should always be your decision though.