Getting a life back

[Jpdee75]

Don’t know if anyone can relate to this but it’s seem like I’m in a parallel universe and I just can’t break through the veil and life in the world I belong. I’m so confused I can’t define weather or not my feelings are psychological or physical symptom from bi. The brain is so powerful and I’m sure the hell im going through which is bi and personal developments which have made a bad situation worse my brain very well could be playing tricks and making me feel worse. I’m just starting to try and get a new life together and trying to work with my limitations and except things I really don’t what to, you just can’t prepare for life to be so hard. The big question:why me ???

[catrabb1t]

Sorry you feel like this. What you are trying to do with your life, like many on here, is profound. I'm feeling confused myself right now, but my thought is you must use strategies to counterbalance the stresses of life. Do what makes you feel good as much as possible.

I make it sound so easy don't I, hopefully you know I don't mean it like that. But self-care (I bloody hate that term) has to be a top priority. I am no where close to achieving that myself yet. You sound like you have learned a lot and have a plan -they are both very good progress.

I never ask question like "why me?" because my brain does not work like that. It is such a hard place to be so I feel for you. Sending you strength.

[Leaf100]

Hi Jpdee75

I feel odd inthe world as well, kind of like it went on without me and I have trouble relating to 'normal ' people and what now seem to me as petty complaints.

From what I ahve heard people say here it seems not inusual to feel you have sory of slipped into another dimension. Our oerecotions have chaned and how we think and feel have changed and so has hiw we interact with the world.

All any of use can do is take it one step at a time, which may mean getting through the next minute, never mind the day infront of us. It may feel like we are going nowhere but we are going somewhere just very slow, and maybe in different ways than we did before.

If it helps at all, I guess I would ask 'why not me?' Stuff hapoens to people all the time. I think sometimes in our society people have this hidden value system where we think if we are good nothing bad will haooen, which may underly some of this sort of stress. Truth is, stuff happens. It isn't personal it is just luck of the draw. That can be harder to process than it sounds and I know that terrain well as my life hasnt been sponsored by Disney Land and I have had a lot of giant pot holes in the road of life. By some measure it does seem unfair , though it was all stuff beyond my control and means nothing about my character or the kind of person I am. I try not yo let my brai run in that direction too much as it does no good. There is something to be said for telling that chattering voice in your head to be kind - we often think things to ourselves we woukd never dream of saying to anyone else. And yes that little voice that chatters is part of our makeup, a d it thinks it is us, but is not us, just a part of us that sometimes needs to be put in its place - ie thanks for sharing now stop and get busy working out how to make a cake. At least I fin d giving mine another task helps - especially one it can do quietly without keeping me up at night. Yes, oddly enough this works . I find being kind to that chattering voice, painful parts, being tired or whatever, has helped a lot.

Peope sometimes do have existential crisis, but the short answer is kife is empty and meaningless so in that case make yp your own because it doesnt matter if you do - and if it helps you feel better that is a positive win - and zero penalty if you got it wrong, because you can't get it wrong.

On the other hand maybe youtube videos of birds singing or it raining or watching people clean carpets or paint pictures will help your brain be in a happy place.

Also remember if it all gets too hard you can reach out to Headway - number is in a link from the box on the right side of the screen. They may be able to help you get an evaukation to see if medication may help and some counselling or help understanding the injury and how it impacts you

And how you esperience the world.

Hope something here helps.

Keep us posted

Leaf

[Pairofboots]

Why me? Two little words, and a question that doesn't have an answer. Ok, we can say we should have done this and that, or we shouldn't have done this or that. Hindsight is a fool because it can't change the past.

Like throughout our life, we get dealt a hand of cards, and we play what we are given. We reset the goals, and we put the proverbial best foot forward.

It's a long road, we hit a few hills, but remember when it is hard work going up, we hold on to that we know just over the brow of the hill we can enjoy the ride down. 🍀

[Nafnaf87]

Just keep trying to engage. I have lost count of the number of times I have been (or putting it more kindly - felt) completely abandoned by everybody - medical authorities, local authority, police, legal, government and my own family. Thing is, it all just disappears in to that great big hole that is my past and I don't really remember.

That said, 24 years on from my accident and 2-1/2 years after losing my family I think I have at last got a couple of people in my corner. My GP is working really hard on my behalf, she is currently giving the awful local mental health services hell and has got the local Brain Injury Service to take on their responsibility again; I just got an appointment with a Consultant Clinical Neuropsychologist and Assistant Psychologist in a couple of weeks time.

I also involved my local MP's office and he has backed up my GP and I think is giving it to the local council.

Keep stumbling on, even though like me you feel you haven't a clue what you're doing.

Best wishes

Michael

[Leaf100 in reply to Nafnaf87]

Hang in there.

Leaf