Please, can someone tel me how life continues after a brain fart?
Pre brain fart I was busy all the time. I had a Crewe and purpose. Now, Billy no mates doesn’t come close. What is the point? I’m no longer valued or needed. What is out there for me ?
If I sound pathetic it’s cos that’s how I feel. I used to be useful. Now? I feel I don’t exist ! I can’t be alone in my thoughts? Can I ?
It's difficult, I had mine at end of January, I am now at the stage where I pulled my back hoovering the car also pulled muscle in my shoulder ( in my sleep). Everything seems to be falling apart. I have only the closest of my friends and family left. Happy to find out people's true colours and will probably never return to work. Trying to get to a point where life is livable and then a total rebuild ( that's my aim) life has took a drastic change and needs to be rebuilt brick by brick.
Try to be patient. I felt the same way after my accident 18 months ago. Many of my friends have sort of abandoned me as if they think Ive changed in some way. I had a smallish bleed and no obvious symptoms before or after. My recovery from surgery was swift. However I had resigned from work after working long hours and being bullied. I have just started a new job part time. One thing I do know is that life wont be the same but you can make the best of it that you can.
I am terrified of long distance flying but determined to go back to Europe next year. What I crave is the company of people who have endured a TBI. There is very little support available here in NZ. I am thinking of settting up a support group.
So, just hang in there and take things slowly. I am sure it will get better for you.
Life continues but it is a different sort of life a sort of beige colour.
Yep, most of us have experienced that feeling when you turn around and wonder where every one has gone.
Of course another way of looking at it - is that now someone has poured Domestos over your life and everything has been wiped clean you get to start over again. All the people that you thought were friends and really weren't, well they are part of the 99% of germs that were killed off.
The other reality that soon bites - there is nobody out there that will help. The NHS, the Job Centre, doctors etc. once you become "walking wounded" that's it.
Once I realised that really you are alone, staring at a blank piece of paper, I started to do stuff to fill in my time. Everything I tried took ages and at first wasn't that good but the more you do stuff the better it becomes.
The first kick up the backside for me was food. Everything was tasting awful and miserable, so I started to cook, it took me 3.5 hours to make a cottage pie. At the end, it tasted marvellous but then I was so hungry 
One of the things that is really good is having an allotment, fresh air, you get to burn off the emotions digging and there is a lot of banter between the people. Even if your not into gardening, ask one of the old boys at a local plot if you can do some digging - it clears the mind beautifully and gets rid of pent up feelings.
So in a post Domestos world where everything has been sanitised its up to you to put some of your own marks back on it
I feel the same way - although I have days I feel better than others. NHS tell me I've had no changes yet I.dont feel the same person at all. My friends & family Dont really understand it and think I'm attention seeking. I was mid degree so thats 3 years hard work I've got to now leave and a debt with nothing to show for it. I'm struggling to find a job as no-one wants middle aged women whose had brain surgery - feeling utterly lost and alone. I wanted to be that person who encouraged you but I feel like I died effectively and there is this empty shell functioning but not living and no-one else notices I've died. I'm pushing on applying for lots of jobs just hoping that if I get some kind of employment then I can regain some of my self respect and a bit of life for me. I feel terrified of rejection coz dont feel strong enough to keep getting that though.
Oh honey, please try to stay positive, only the strong get dealt the hand you have; try reading ‘why me, why now, why this?’ By Robin Norwood. Xx
I really do need to lighten up some days. On a positive note I’ve been offered voluntary work with a possibility of work coming from it so may be seeing a glimpse of light. I’m sorry Hayloft64 my response was very negative but actually just wanted to say “you’re not alone in feeling low somedays”. That I don’t think it’s wrong to feel that way sometimes, sometimes it’s ok to have an off day, wallow in it but then get back up and keep going. There will always be people better off not also people worse off. I hope Hayloft64 its a better day today and I’m hoping things improve for you soon too xx Thanks Bradbike for the kick up the bum I needed 😉☺️
Hi Hayloft after my SAH I was on a downer and my Daughter found "behind the grey" so instead of planning my funeral as I thought that was next step !! I looked at my Family and realised what I put them through and every time I wanted a moan I typed my frustrations out and how I felt that day. Had a good hubby and Family around me and my sisters who saw how I was could see light at the end of tunnel. I am a survivor even though some days I feel like poop . This isn't something we can rush and as long as our loved ones care about us well everything is fine by me. Trouble was I ate a load of chocs as I said to myself "Win what you have been through you deserve them" That was a good year until I hit the scales ping clang bong been on a diet for 2 years now I am a haggard old dear who has lost weight. Listen Hay we are on this journey and together we can make it. You'll get days when the tired me sets in (Go for a lay down) and you'll find more days are easier the get out even if for a cuppa . I wish you well in your recovery we are all in this for the long haul so keep a smile at hand and sing happy songs my remedy for all ills Good luck from one survivor to another
Your not alone mate
I'm sorry that I don't have any advice or wisdom. I just wanted you to know that you are worthy and valued. Sorry you're feeling this way and going through this. You'll be in my prayers
When did it happen? There is life after, but it takes effort, I think. Do you have family and friends? These make it a lot easier. If not, try and get out there. There is a website called "meet up", I think, and on it there are lots of groups of all different interests you might like to try getting involved with. Could turn your life around! All the best. x
Life has to change and you have to learn to adapt your life to these changes wheelchair/walking aid and all... Take time to accept the new you and you will learn to be happy again! Kate 😀
Life after Tbi
UK Brain injury support after 13years!
Strange Things
Personality/Life Changes...?
Getting a life back
