Live in carers?

[Kentcarer]

I’m looking at the options for my brain damaged partner as he comes out of rehab. I feel he would get better care at home with a live in carer to do a lot of his personal care ( full toileting/ movement by hoist/ supervised feeding and repositioning ) and allow me to still have some life. Does anyone here have experience of live in care and firms to recommend. ? Many thanks .

[Pairofboots]

Hi Kent, I don't have experience of this, but some considerations. Have you got room for equipment at home? A live in carer, again do you have room for separate facilities for the carer? Separate bathroom, rest area to socialise?, Cooking facilities? The amount of hours the carer will need to provide care?rest days, how are these going to be covered? The HR factor of employing a carer. Sharing your life with a third person in your living environment? And direct, and indirect costs. It shouldn't really be a consideration, but money can not be ignored. It sounds like your partner will require potentially 24/7 care, so this will mean that you take on the care role outside of the employed carers hours, this in itself is a big commitment. I'm not suggesting that you wouldn't gladly take this on, but is this going to be something that you practically, physically/mentally to on? What does the discharge team think about this? As I said at the beginning, I don't have the experience, these are things that I would think need some thought. 🍀

[Kentcarer in reply to Pairofboots]

Thanks POB for your thoughtful reply. I agree with every point you have raised. There is a lot to consider. As ever enough money covers all the issues and I’m trying to work through these and get a sense of the costs versus residential care. There are companies like Bluebird Care who manage the whole thing including providing the extra 24 hr repositioning nighttime bit from additional carers coming in so I wouldn’t do that. The attraction in theory is I can make sure he gets the best care myself because I am on site and give him the best chance for some recovery in his home but not have to do it all and be able to leave the house myself. It’s early days but I’m going to cost it up at least. I would still welcome any views from those who have done it too. Thank and hope you have a great week!

[Pairofboots in reply to Kentcarer]

Residential care would either be NHS rehab/continuing care which would not have a cost, and private/council run care homes that will cost. I have just had a financial assessment with a view to at home care, this is currently set at a maximum cost of £112p/w increasing as of April (this would be the same for residential, but as rent/mortgage would be added to the amount payable). This is as a single person living alone. The threshold is higher for married/civil partnership (I'm not sure what the benchmark is for cohabiting, I would hope as married, but it will have a legal basis), but income from both parties is taken into account.

[Kentcarer in reply to Pairofboots]

Thanks for the extra info. I’ll keep researching. Many thanks

[New_beginning]

I did all my husband's rehabilitation at home, however he is mobile,though this was difficult in it self with post traumatic Amnesia with obsconding, attacking delivery men, frightening anyone, fixation on wires, fixation on just about anything etc.. then Traumatic Brain Injury symptoms on tip. No physical support due to covid and I refused placement with so many difficult situations, we have just reached our 2nd year.

I can understand your view, but unless you have financial funding to put into place initially, what you are requesting is unrealistic, what does your loved one want, have you even recorded the direct contact/support he has in rehabilitation to provide evidence with 24/7 request.

I still struggle I am 39 but I ensure everything I do with my husband who is 43 is fully involved. Supporting a loved one I can't put into words it's beyond commitment, I am only now putting myself on the list to take care of myself, which has been difficult to capture. However I feel very honoured putting my everything with my husband and no regrets making sacrifices, and most of all I am the proudest wife despite the difficulties he continues to face.

How long has your partner been in rehabilitation unit

[Kentcarer in reply to New_beginning]

Thank you for coming back to me. I'm very sorry to hear about your husband and the issues you have both had to face. Unfortunately nearly 9 months after his stroke my partner has no mental capacity for decision making ( and has been formally, legally, evaluated as such by the unit) and barely speaks. He had a grade 5 SAH which has left him with very little physical ability ( and needs to be moved every 2 hours over 24 hours to prevent pressure sores) and very little awareness of where he is or what has happened to him. He is largely quiet, mainly content, thank goodness, and my priority is to try to maximise any further recovery ( the rehab unit do not think there will be much but we will see) and to make him as comfortable and happy as I can. Whilst I am waiting for him to be assessed for CHC and exactly what care is needed I am looking at all options both at home and in residential care, That's why I was seeing if anyone else had actual experience of live in carers. I hope that things improve for you. Its a hard road and we are all doing our best.

[New_beginning in reply to Kentcarer]

I wish you all the best and so hope your hopes become reality and be great to hear on process, updates on this. I'm sure you will have lots of response on this topic.

[ored13]

Hi Kent. I worked as a live in carer with Christie's Care for a bit when I was younger. I'm not sure whether it has changed, but at the time they were really good to work with. We worked on a self employed basis with them as an agent who would facilitate things and make sure that we had the correct level of experience for what was required. For the postings I was in it was very important that the family be the family and that you work alongside them. Many carers worked on ao tjly or fortnightly basis with a regular client so they were well rested and the carer was always fresh. I know that some companies offer a care team as such that rotate out.

Hope this helps. I had also looked into Corimium Care. As far as I understand their selection process was quite strict as well.

[Kentcarer in reply to ored13]

Thank you, that s a few more I can look at. From what I am seeing the costs for residential nursing care and a live in carer arent much different!Thanks for getting back to me.

[123Bereft]

All I can say is that my partner sounds in a very similar state and he is in a care home that specialises in neurological disorders, funded by CHC, he is always clean and happy and they do a really good job. I don't think I could cope with him at home, when there is no communication there is very little relationship. May sound harsh, but it is true. All the best.

[Kentcarer in reply to 123Bereft]

I’m very grateful for your comment and really understand how you will have come to that very difficult decision. My partner is still able to communicate with us with smiles and some words and comments but it varies greatly from day to day. On bad days I recognise how difficult it would be to have no contact at all. I’m really pleased to know you have found somewhere good for him to live which I know may still have to be the outcome for us. Thanks again