Am i strange for loving life on my own. - Headway

Headway

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Am i strange for loving life on my own.

Purpleclax
Purpleclax

Hi everyone new on here. Rta aged 16 severe head trauma, left hemiplegic but life goes on I have worked hard to be independent I have a great job as a PA. married a twat, divorced a twat worse mistake of my life. I felt so grateful to have met someone having a disability that I married the first thing to come along. I did not even fancy him madness. I'm struggling to get over this big mistake but at the same time I don't think I can live with anyone again. Does anyone else really love living on there own???

15 Replies

I live alone and don't foresee that ever changing. It's good that you are finding your own way forward in life. I don't think we have to be with someone to be fulfilled. I think society tells us we should all want the same things but we don't. I admire you for doing what's best for you.

All the best. 🙂🌸

Living on my own definitely has its plus points P - I think I would have difficulty sharing the TV handset now... plus it makes insomnia enjoyable rather than awkward to explain 😊.

It's a lot better than living with someone horrible too 🌸

Thank you guys at work everyone thinks I'm odd as I love living on my own so much. I'm so glad I found this site I have felt so alone since the accident really. Thank you so much. I agree with all your comments. My mood can swing at any moment I have found. The trigger is silly things like not being able to get a lid off a jar etc but v few people understand. Thank you for responding xx

Marnie22
Marnie22 in reply to Purpleclax

You really don't have to be alone on here - someone will give you support or just a chat whenever you want. 😊🌸

This relates to what I’ve said before.

I live on my own. Been a chef and was also a dog handler in the Army so I know my way around a washing machine, ironing board and a cooker.

Ppl think there must be something up with me cos I’m not with anyone.

I’m not desperate and don’t need looking after.

I used to live next door to a lad who went with any female cos he wasn’t able to look after himself. It was hilarious when he was alone and he’d hung whites on the washing line that he’d washed with colours.

So you’re not strange to live life on your own

Thank you guys feeling so much better for finding this site. If I can master holidays on my own that's me sorted 👍

Marnie22
Marnie22 in reply to Purpleclax

I have done a few short trips on my own. Before my brain injury I went to New York and Los Angeles on my own, but now my mobility is poor and I can't work, so trips have to be nearer and a lot cheaper. It's great not to have to negotiate what you plan to do or where to go for lunch! 😀🌸

I much prefer holidays alone, you can do and see what you want without compromise

Wow LA I would love to go there. New York was ok but been there. I really love travel and have all the relationships I have had not one of them liked travel but hey another thing I don't have to concern myself with. Thank you everyone xx

Nope 👌

Hi, I said for years never again. Yep you guessed it. I did eventually say yes to marriage again. Well that lead to a whole heap of trouble including a brain hiccup. So I am currently in the never again, again camp. But..........

Yes I love it. Alsomarried a twat and my brain injury revealed my error!i leftamidst the pandemic,and am so happy alone. I see my kids(4) once a week and that is quite enough. I could never live back in a family home. So i completely relate

Thanks everyone for the first time since my accident I'm feeling that I'm not alone and people do understand me and there are people similar to me. Xd

I don't think it's being strange preferring to be on your own, I seem to be like that after my accident . I fell on my sisters birthday fractured my skull and blood clot on my brain 🧠and my l5 vertebrae of my spine is smashed .before injury I was all ways on my feet I used to box and trained fighters and had my own building business never 1 for sitting down, but thats all changed now I can spend time with people for a wee while but after brain injury a seem spend time by myself and family ,I think its common after a tbi

Hi, it’s so good to hear that there are so many of us out here that can struggle with relationships! I was in a similar situation to you, I think and allowed myself to ‘fall in love’ with the first woman who showed me some affection, after my head injury. Even though from pretty much day one I could see we were very different, how controlling she was etc, we still needed up getting married, have 3 incredible children but then out of the blue (in my opinion!) she told me by text she wanted a divorce...that was nearly 20 months ago and I’ve been living my life the way I want to live it since then...incredibly challenging though that can be at times! I see the kids fairly often, though she won’t allow 50:50 for some reason, the twat that she is...

I wonder if I’ll be on my own forever now, though would welcome the companionship of a partner again...as long as they understood the complexities of the TBI...life is different for us, we struggle with the simplest of things some times and as others have said, can get easily triggered by basic things not going the way we expect them to go - I’ve been know to flip if I can’t find a specific utensil in the kitchen when trying to cook a family meal and she’ll come storming in yelling at me and telling me to stop slamming drawers as I’m scaring the kids - “I’m only looking for the wooden spoon!!” And she’ll see it straight away but then hold my outburst against me forever....

Anyway, sorry, I seem to have opened a floodgate!! I hope that you are soon able to get over what has happened and that you find continued peace and happiness. I also have a long and bumpy road ahead through this divorce procedure as she sees herself as entitled to half of the compensation money I was paid after my accident (21 years ago), even though it was paid to me largely as a fund to support me through future loss of earnings for the rest of my life! Bitch.

All the best 😊☀️👍🏻

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