Newbie!

[Suej2020]

Hi Everyone.

I've just joined. Hope you are keeping as well as possible. Take care. Stay safe. X.

[Marnie22]

Hello and a big welcome to you!

I hope you find lots of support and information here. It's a great place to learn from others, to ask or answer questions and to just feel supported in whatever is going on with you.

All the best. 🙂🌸

[Suej2020 in reply to Marnie22]

Thank you for a lovely welcome 😊

[twice]

Welcome, I am relatively new here myself and I find it's great to be able to connect with fellow brain injury survivors, I am sure you will find it very helpful.

Take care.

[Suej2020 in reply to twice]

Thank you so much 😊

[New_beginning]

Hello,

Im new too. I have received great advice.

[Suej2020 in reply to New_beginning]

Welcome to you too! 😊

[cat3]

Hi Sue and welcome. My SAH was eight years ago and I'm still seeing improvements ; or maybe just learned a little more patience ! Tell us a bit more about yourself & how you've been coping .……..when you feel ready.

Cat x

[Suej2020 in reply to cat3]

Thank you so much Cat. I was an observer for a while a couple of years ago, but never posted anything. Your kindness and advise always stood out. One of the heads of 'the family' I feel! I have always felt extremely lucky, and sometimes guilty, that I survived my burst aneurysm 5 years ago. Some visual problems and extra emotional, with slight character/personality differences now, that's all. I work and care for my adult daughter too. Off work with stress at the moment as I was to be reassigned at work due to Covid-19 and I don't cope well with sudden change etc. I'm getting my confidence back gradually and know I will be ok. Sorry to waffle on. It's been good to actually 'voice this' to people who will have empathy. Only spoken to one other person in a similar situation before.

Thank you for reading - if you got this far!! 😊

[cat3 in reply to Suej2020]

Interesting that you mention guilt. I felt guilty for a long time over the shock and distress my family had to endure whilst I was blissfully unaware of everything around me.

I'm curious to know what it is that's causing your guilt trips Sue, although I'm guessing it's a similar issue to mine ; at least my son and daughter had each other for support. It must have been SO frightening for your daughter.

The Covid crisis has certainly added to the strain of coping with a brain injury ; I often panic when faced with changes of plans or failing at some project or other.

After a lifetime of endless patience I've become very, very intolerant to noise, especially TV ads or someone talking none-stop ! ...all par for the Bi course.... 🥴 x

[Suej2020 in reply to cat3]

Hi Cat.

I think my guilt is literally, why should I be the lucky survivor when others suffer so much. Maybe because my daughter needs me, or I should be doing something more with my life?? I think it is harder for our families than us when we become ill. I have a husband and another daughter and son who are always there for me. They protect and look out for me. I'm prone to be more judgemental and get agitated more easily than I used to. I dont like this side of me at all. Also cry easily which is tiring and sometimes embarrassing. Generally though I still try to be my positive, happy, wacky self!!

'Walkers' crisps adverts with the human crunching noises drives me crazy lol!! 🤫😤 x.

[cat3 in reply to Suej2020]

Judgemental - agitated - emotional ; absolutely ! Most days I need to take a step back and listen to myself putting everything to rights and, though whoever I'm with usually agrees, I'm always the one vocalising an issue. And the slightest resistance, whether it's something fiddly just not working or losing an argument, is guaranteed to bring on the racing heart and emotional fireworks.

As with you Sue, it's a characteristic I dislike in myself ; it's not who I was or who I want to be. And though we know it's a direct consequence of the brain injury and that detesting ourselves just exacerbates the problem, it's hard to overcome when caught off guard (and to excuse) especially if it involves loved ones.

At times when the old me would've been distraught, I'm often emotionally vacant, yet a hurt creature in a cartoon can reduce me to heaving sobs. I guess we're coping with a blend of neurological and psychological damages, but all we can do is our best, and to apologise when our best isn't good enough.

Take care m'love. It looks to me like you're doing just fine.....

PS Thank you for your kind comments earlier ; they mean a lot ! 😐 x

[Hidden]

Hi Suej2020 only been on here 24hrs myself but already finding it useful with some good pointers on what will be a long recovery journey. Stay safe

[Suej2020 in reply to Hidden]

Well done Colin. So pleased it has been helpful already. Take care 😊