Here we go again !!! Someone say day ja vuueeee - Headway


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Here we go again !!! Someone say day ja vuueeee


So I'm not back in work 2 days in the new year to be told by manager as of next week I'm reducing your work load as your making far to many mistakes due to your medication and I'm back feeling worthless why do I even try I called biru CRYING to be told we still have no one to run clinic but I will pass on your message, the gp receptionist while telling everyone else we have no appointments when I explained that I want a second opinion gave me a appointment for Monday, my manager claims to have referred me to OT but I haven't received a text notification yet I just don't have it in me to go though this again, I should just sit and wait for the suicidal thoughts to re start

*curls up and crys to sleep*

12 Replies

I’m so very sorry . I thank my lucky stars I’m retired now and don’t have to go through this hassle . It was bad enough when I had cancer , six months of chemo then two months of radiotherapy and my boss said “ now you have had the treatment when will you be back ?”. Needless to say I told him to stuff it. Pity you can’t do that too . I feel for you Bexx and there is no point in saying don’t worry — cos of course you will . Have a good greet and bash a pillow if you have the strength.

Shona 😔😔😔🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿Xx

bexx87 in reply to Shon48

Thanks everyone that has cancer gets time off but I don't ... it's so wrong that one mental health gets priority and understanding over another I could walk out as j threated before but I think that would make me seem more unemployable its just a pain that I have to go through all this again luckily I didn't cancel my trade union sub as a backup as I feel I may need it to make it sink in but if it was up to my manager I would be out the door a year ago that's what he would like which is why no one is giving me that option as everyone ca see I'm worth so much more than him

Shon48 in reply to bexx87

It’s terrible that people don’t understand about mental health . It affects everybody differently but I know since I had this aneurysm I would never have got back to work . I really think this is worse than the cancer treatment. . Hugs 🤗 xx

bexx87 in reply to Shon48

Thanks I'm going to query tomorrow with my trade union If he is allow to legally reduce my workload while I wait for consultation to see what they say and when I had my 2nd session out of 8 of CBT my manager thought it should have done the job just to relate to part of your post

Bex wrote "your making far to many mistakes due to your medication "

With a level head, my response would be....

1. Thank you for your comments

2. When is the meeting to discuss in more depth so I have a chance at improving my output?

3. Where is the list of mistakes I have made eg date, time, activity, perceived mistake, corrective action required, who carried out corrective action, loss value/impact on business. If there is not one, create one! To capture the perceived 'issue'. This will be required in any court of law your union may represent you in at a later date.

4. How did you come to the conclusion it is related to my medication and not some other change in the company or team or market place or customer that has impacted on my efficiency?

5. As my manager, please explain what systems are in place to ensure the processes I carry out are to a high standard? Lets discuss how could they be improved to better support me /explore if they are robust enough for me and my colleagues.

6. We are both aware of my history of BI, but are we both 100% sure and in agreement that this is why I am making more mistakes? Is your perception right - see point 3.

7. Thank you for your kind offer to reduce my workload to support my BI recovery however I have certain financial commitments and require your assurance that my financial take home will remain the same for the foreseeable future. My strengths are X, perhaps you are able (for a period of 3 months) to redistribute the team work so that I can excel in the things I am best at doing and temporarily change my job description to reflect this.

BI makes you vulnerable in a work situation. Amongst the aggressive pushy Alpha types you find in a workplace, a BI is likely to not want a fight, not stand up for themselves, stand their ground yes, but not fight their position. Because its stressful and we usually try to avoid stress if we can. Some alphas will use that against you, knowing you are weaker and pick on you.

There are those who get a whiff of a BI and assume you are the butt of all errors and the reason their day is going badly, regardless of the facts. Prejudice is difficult to overcome for some people even though laws govern fair play at work for all.

There will be an element of uncertainty about who is right, is it my BI or is it the crazy work situation which is being unreasonable.

My advice to you is clear you head - whatever that takes - gardening is good.

Then list all the mistakes you are aware of, and why you think you might have made them (if indeed you did), if it was only your fault in all instances (which I doubt). Chances are, the work processes are badly designed, poorly implemented, not maintained and not written down. BI people like things to be written down, to allow checking steps have been followed. A successful work environment documents its processes regardless of BI.

I make my comments as above because your writings in this group always appear well thought out, logical in their layout, well argued, strong, clear and easily understood. All qualities of an excellent employee.

By the way, do you feel your medication is a problem? If so, see the doc to check there is not another medication that will have less side effects.


bexx87 in reply to RecoveringH

Hi thanks for your comments and kind words they have massively helped I'm only aware of one issue I have made which (medication or not) that I know of as I have made it a few times which have gone unnoticed by manager, I'm the one saying: medication, medication, medication as it's what the dr tells me to say, but manager isn't believing me, I will print out your suggestions and use it as a template in our conversation, I have a gp appointment on Monday to get a secondary opinion as suggested by headway, yes it is common side effects as I didn't even have to open my mouth to my gp and he said are you feeling irratable and angry yet and I said yes it's made work worse fix it which I got a blank response to I have now calmed down sleep may still be a issue but meeeeeh it just all hit me when I got home from work and i had to forcefully tell my gp this time last year as you have no idea I'm taking myself off this medication and don't care which I feel I may have to do again

By the way your first sentence is what my manager said and started the convo off with

Hidden in reply to RecoveringH

I'm saving this to my notes - good approach!

Morning, brief reply as I'm not at a desk. Have you spoken with remploy? Agency set up to help people with disabilities to get or stay in work.

I would not have coped without their help and them talking to my then employers.

BTW rather than curl up and wait for the suicidal thoughts to reappear why not try something to avoid them? Some guided meditation might be a good idea?

Good luck

I tired and nothing worked I did manage to fall asleep but it was at 4am and have only just woke up

Follow your own advice. Don't stressed about things you can't control.

What a really horrible situation Bexx. I feel so bad for you. I echo what others say here and its awful that employers don't understand BI at all. They suddenly seem to be getting there with mental health. But those of us with 'invisible' disabilities really suffer. It makes me really angry and I can't think of it as anything other than discrimination. Have you tried getting some advice from the CAB or similar? I don't think they can just force you into taking reduced hours.

bexx87 in reply to lcd8

I am dealing with the situation that has kicked all this off and have gotten so many people support me right now I don't want to talk about it openly

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