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Our journey so far part 2

Yesterday I Posted my first post about my husbands bi. After my post I got a call from the hospital! My husband was asking the nurse to call as he wants to see his wife and kids! I was over the moon at this and agreed I would take them the next day!

So this morning I woke up feeling quite positive and had a spring in my step, I hadn’t felt this happy since before his accident!

My boys are 7 year old and identical twins, Jesse has cerebral palsy and it’s quite severe. He is unable to walk,talk, feed himself and is also registered blind. My husband has always been Jesses main carer, bathing him, dressing him, taking him to the school bus.

Anyway I’m getting off track slightly here but I went to make a brew this morning (boys were awake as they sleep with me) and I came in to find Jesse having a seizure it’s only the 3rd one in 7 years! I had to act quickly phoning ambulance give him his medication to get him out of the seizure (which I have never had to use before because he’s only ever had two) and then I had to get hold of my sister to go to hospital with Jesse as I needed to drive his adapted vechicle over to bring him back!

I never did get to take the boys to see their daddy and now I’m feeling so guilty! I feel like I’m going 1 step forward 2 steps back! I’m trying so hard to look after my boys, visit my husband and try and be strong but I feel I’m at breaking point! I’m forcing myself to eat as I lost over a stone in the first 2 weeks.

I feel utter rubbish tonight! Going from a high 24 hours ago! It’s like I’m fighting a losing battle.

I haven’t seen my husband since Monday and today would have been great to take the children. He’s still in PTA stage but I think it would have done all of us good being together as a family.

4 Replies

Oh Vikki, how very sad and difficult for you all. Jesse must be really missing his dad and your other boy must be struggling too. I do hope the lad has got over his seizure and has no effects from it. I wish there was something any of us could do to help. Just remember, we are here for you if you need to talk.

At least your husband asking to see you all was a positive step, hopefully the beginning of many improvements on his way to recovery.

Do look after yourself, it is most important as you are holding them all together at the moment, a really hard thing to do.

Take care.



Vikki, fate intervened to spoil your reunion today and, considering the nature of the event, It's no surprise you're feeling overwhelmed.

But tomorrow's another day and the fact remains that your worst fears about your husband have been alleviated.............. and the good news you recieved yesterday still applies.

I hope you'll get rest & respite from the stress of today, and that your boy recovers from his seizure with no lasting distress.

And I look forward to hearing about your visit with your man. Cat x


I am so sorry, Vikki, that you did not get the lift you expected today and instead, got such a frightening experience.

When you have rested a bit, I hope you see what I see: That you very ably handled the most important thing that needed to be done today. Wishing you could have done more on that day is understandable but hurtful to you. One more day of rest for your husband is a good thing: Each day, even when you cannot be there because you are filing in his role as well as yours, gets him a step farther in his recovery.

You, too, are on a journey: Not of recovery, but of growth. You will see yourself being capable of more than you ever imagined. But as you wisely noted, you will need to look after your physical, emotional and spiritual health. Eating well is a good place to start. Living in the present moment, reaching out for advice and help will also be important.

We are all wishing you the best!


SO many HUGS! coming your way,you deaserve them! take care and yes tomrrow is another day,iam glad to read that everyone is ok

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