Lonely

[spideyman]

I find that even years after a brain injury it can prove to be a lonely existence.

Does anyone else find this?

[Kirk5w7]

Yes, but only because I'm better on my own. Interaction with others is so exhausting, takes so much out of me.

Janetx

[Elenor3]

Loving the Billy icon lol. Sadly it seems to be the case that you can feel isolated even when surrounded by lots of people? Feeling 'not part of everything' can highlight the separateness. So glad to have joined this forum

[spartan300]

same here sometimes i am better on my own but but do not want to be too many ups and downs, and it does not help when people say you look a picture of health and look 10 years younger than i am

John

[Nutkin33]

Like Janet said, I think I'm far better on my own!  I am lucky to have my sister, my niece, and my parents, quire close!

Debs xx

[Trudi-Cox]

I so agree, I used to be the life and soul of the party, now... I almost dread social gatherings, and have to plan to have two quiet days afterwards, in which to recover, my husband is so understanding, I am so lucky, and whisks me away when my brain starts to fog up, after an hour of noise and chat, but friends look askance, 'You can't be going yet...?...'

[fuzzyhead]

Totally with you on this. I'm super lucky that my wife, even though she doesn't have an injury, is pretty much the same as me socially - we're like peas in a pod in that way.

For years I wanted to be validated by the people around me but they had no idea what I was going through so they probably didn't even know that that's what I wanted...

I'm in a place in my head now where my own validation is usually enough, but we all have bad days. Is there a Headway group close to you? I never went to one even after the penny dropped with my injury, but a friend of the family who I told about Headway after that absolutely loves it (she has acquired BI I think)...the people there get it, which I think covers a lot of the distance inherent to brain injuries which make the victim feels isolated.

You can always PM me if you want some screen company!

[spideyman in reply to fuzzyhead]

Thanks for your reply Fuzzy.

I'm with TWO headway groups

[sospan]

The problem with head injuries is that it isn't just a single cause of the problem.  You can understand that when we are hurting from the injury then we aren't going to be the most sociable bear in the forrest more likely the one with the sorest head.

We then have to deal with coming to terms with our social problems memory, speach, patience with others, bright lights, loud noise and so on.

To add to the isolation most of us lose the companionship of work  and the friends we thought we had soon disappear as well.

To add the final straw to the poor camels back, we end up on benefits and can no longer afford to do the things we used to. Then some wise GP or Occupational Therapist suggests taking up a hobby and you look at them as if they have never had to juggle bills let alone buy a decent camera to take up photography and having left over Dulux isn't a good foundation to start watercolours.

Yep its a hard battle not to become isolated