lonely

Hi my name is mark in 1992 I suffered from blood clots on the brain and a few stroke I was 16 at the time since then I have got on with life I’m married with 2 grown up daughters.Over the past couple of years I am finding it hard as I have no friends and it just feels lonely sometimes suicide has crossed my mind I’ve been so close to ending it all I want to chat to people online but everywhere is a dating site I just need friends I am now 47 with no one to talk to it really is hard is there anybody else in the same place as me that wants to chat 🙁 hope to hear back from anyone.Thankyou

[Jonty77]

hi mark,

I just wrote a reply and then managed to lose it and now I have to do it again I just feel really fatigued.

So will it do to say “hi” there’s plenty of us out here that know how you feel. It’s pretty lonely, even when people are around sometimes.

I listen to music

Watch tv

Walk in nature

Do meditations on YouTube

Do art

All these things help keep the demons away when they start circling. I’ve also had therapy to help me reframe negative thought patterns. It really helps to have a few tools in the toolbox as it were. I actually didn’t do too bad in the end.

Hang in there. I’m sure others will reply too with lots of advice and support.

[Hidden in reply to Jonty77]

thankyou for your reply hope to keep chatting

[cat3]

Hi mark... I can see how you've struggled over the years with lack of moral support and feelings of isolation.

Are you mobile enough to get outdoors and walk unaided ? If you're able, and prepared to give it a try, getting out of the house is the first step towards boosting serotonin levels.

I'm no medical expert but I know from experience of clinical depression how walking can create the feelgood hormones, and by walking in the rain you can benefit from electrically charged molecules in the atmosphere (negative ions) which have instant mood boosting properties.

Sounds simplistic maybe, but it's a process, starting with boosting physical & mental wellbeing and building on that by re-categorising loneliness as independence & taking some control.

........and keep talking here ! Cat x

[Hidden in reply to cat3]

hi thanks for your reply I had my spine broken and my leg snapped so find it very difficult to get out

[cat3 in reply to Hidden]

Oh I'm sorry Mark ; I have balance and mobility issues and sympathise with 'cabin fever' and loss of friendships. I can manage a walk to the shops on good days but always pay for it afterwards ! And though I drive, I miss the long walks and the freedom they bring.

Gardening is my main source of independence (I'm lucky having a large garden where can wobble & whinge to my heart's content) and I find growing & nurturing stuff really rewarding ; it gives me much needed feelings of accomplishment.

I'm not a fan of social media either, but you can message me anytime if you need to talk by clicking on 'Chat' at the top of the page and typing in my username... 😐

Cat x

ps...from your profile photo I guess you're a fox fan like me. Mine visit every night for their sausages, peanut butter sandwiches and dog biscuits ! 🦊

[gr33nmind]

At least your married man, wt two grown children. I don’t I’ll ever marry anyone. I am most likely going to die alone.

[Hidden in reply to gr33nmind]

hi there is someone out there for you it just takes time message me I’d like to chat

[TreesMTBI]

Hi Mark I hear you, life can get so lonely but well done for reaching out as that can be hard too. And yes there does seem to be such a focus on ‘dating’ online rather than friends. If you’re mobile/able to get out, have you heard of/considered Men’s Shed? There’s one in my village and they do different activities and visit different places but more importantly they get together for a cuppa and chat, they come from all sorts of backgrounds and interests. It might also help you to get out and connect with others, I know it helps me right now to get around others and to think about something else for a while, so I volunteer at a local playhouse, as I’m going through difficult times. I know you asked for someone to chat online but maybe the suggestions given by people here might help you too. Here’s a link to men’s shed to find a local one. Keep coming back here too, for friendly replies. Take care of yourself Mark and remember we are all here anytime.

menssheds.org.uk/find-a-shed/

[Jessie1963 in reply to TreesMTBI]

Hi there is a mens shed in my village,I live in Wotton-under-Edge I am thinking off taking my husband if I can get him to have you been to it I hope you don't mind me asking

[TreesMTBI in reply to Jessie1963]

Hi Jessie, sorry but I haven’t been (I’m the wrong gender 🤪) but I’ve walked past the venue when it’s been on and seen the guys having what looks like a great time and a real mix of people, and seen lots of publicity about it in our village. Why not speak to whoever runs your local one and get a feel for whether it would be right for your husband? Even if he goes once and doesn’t like it or you find it’s not for him, at least you’ve tried it. Good luck!

[Jessie1963]

Hi my name is Dawn my husband suffered serious brain injury due to the covid injection he is a completely different person,although he is still here half the time he dose not know I am there x

[Hidden in reply to Jessie1963]

I’m so sorry to hear that it’s terrible I hope you are ok l hope you will keep in touch take care of yourself your husband does know your there but it’s hard for him x

[Jessie1963]

Yes I would love to keep in touch as I feel very lonely all the time friends and family seem to have deserted us,plus he was in hospital for 11 months so I shut my self away, what do you struggle with you can private message me if you would like to

[Hidden in reply to Jessie1963]

hi yes would be nice to chat how do I message you on this ?

[Jessie1963]

I will message you,or if you click on my profile there should be a chat, press that but you have to follow me

[ftt1960]

Hi Mark, sorry to read your post. It is difficult to have dealt with your situation from such a young age. Generally people don’t really get where we are coming from. I am lucky to have a close friend, partner and daughter who all get me, thoughothers in my life don’t. It can be a pretty lonely existence. I have retired, so am at home all day and currently unable to drive nor able to venture out on my own. Thankfully I lovethe garden, so spend sunny, dry days there.

There are lots of us here who are happy to chat without looking for any sort of commitment. Plus we are all singing from the same hymn sheet. Reach iut whenever you need to. Lindsay

[Jessie1963 in reply to ftt1960]

My husband cannot go out on his own or can no longer drive,so he spends day out in the garden but cannot do much but he loves the sunshine