Hard to know what to say

i look each day at all the posts and I never know how to put what I want to say into words. I was ran over 3 years ago, and had my first contact/visit from headway yesterday. I had accepted my changes and thought that was me forever. its only now I realise that I'm the way I am because of what happened and is why I seeked help, I can't understand how things can help and improve but from what I'm told and what I read people say it's possible. I hope so.

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  • Hi ed

    welcome aboard and hope you adjust to the new you. Its seems best to instead of seeing the negative changes in your life just think that you are just diffetent know. Something may be worse but others things may be better. You'll have bad days but also good days. It is hard trying to write what you mean but give it a go. We are all in a simular boat and I think i can honestly say the one thing we all do is not judge each other but do learn from each other. All the best.

  • Hi ed09,

    Three years is a long time to go without support from others in the same boat. Like yourself I waited and waited as I had no concept (and wanted to avoid) of what others would say if I shared my loss. On the outside I looked more or less normal and that is what people wanted to see. They wanted me to be normal and wouldn't accept the changed me so I retreated into hermit land and focused 100% on learning and getting back my old self. Consequently many of my close relationships have vanished. People don't like to hear you talk of 'loss', 'struggle' 'confusion', they just like the positive stories as it supports their life view. I had no concept of the severity of what I was going through until abilities started to return, mainly 'the executive' part of the brain which helps in planning, seeing the whole picture and evaluating different outcomes.

    Having posted here for a few days now, it seems to me that those of you who have had an event happen to you, like being run over, must not only be coping with BI but also must have had their trust of cycling or walking dashed. That must be hugely difficult in itself, let alone having to deal with the injury.

    I have found asking for help and interacting with others walking the BI path is enormously comforting and I hope Ed09 you find it is too.

    Best.

  • Hi ed09stg,

    I know that feeling. The feeling of is this it? and where has the person before the accident gone? Every mistake I make brings it back to me, (I have only just left the oven on :( ) I used to beat myself up over everything and to be honest still have days when I am really hard on myself. Finding this group and reading that people feel just like I do, is a huge relief. I remember saying over and over to my head injury consultant that I was going mad. I hope things get better for you soon, there is a lot of help on here.

    Kim :)

  • Hi ed

    Great that you are now looking for help. Just think how far you have already come.

    now that. You are obviously communicating well do not allow yourself to be fobbed off. Identify the area of biggest concern and pester for help in that area.

    Recovery is a full time job and i think tthe results depend on how much effort you put in.

    Focus on one thing at a time. Whether that is walking, reading. Whatever it is and remember to reward yourself for your achievementts .

    Looking forward to hearing how you are getting on.

  • They say the brain never stops healing! I think this is true, cos although my progress is extremely slow, if I look back a whole year, then I can see a change.

    Headway is great, and the befriending there is SO important. To mix with other Brain Injured people is the best, as you start to see yourself in a more positive light.

    Good luck with your progress! 😀😉

  • Hi, it is early days so take baby steps rather than try to run. I had a TBI just before Christmas and just facing up to all my medical changes Tinitusus and a tremor also memory confusion.

    But could have been a lot worse. My doctor said it was the worst head injury he had seen, really cheered me up . At least my MRI Scan proved I had a brain

    Take Care Liz

  • Hi Ed,

    just logged on after a crap week and it does help when you read some of the posts even though I don't always post comments.

    Just reading some of the stories makes you realize you are not going mad like you think you are somedays!!!

    The good days certainly make it worth while and how far and how much you have achieved but sometimes those bad days really makes you think what's happening now.....

    Like my Neuro dr said you will never be the same person I replied I was never normal before(jokingly) but did tell people its been proved I have a brain and a man's hands have actually got inside my head.:) So good luck:)