Another day, same old story

Today has been far the worst, i cant stop thinking about what i am missing out on and my new limitations to my life. It feels like a chore and sentence to live a life like this for another 60 years, being only 21 i cant help but feel like life has been wasted.... sorry for the negativity but its how i feel, and i cant help but feel low

15 Replies

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  • Hi Savage,

    We all have our dark moments-it is never easy coming to terms with our changes.What makes you think you will be like this for the next 60 years ?There will be improvement,no one can say how much how fast but all of us have improved from our initial level.Time and patience will tell.Perhaps you could explain what you are missing out on and what your new limitations are?What are you currently still able to enjoy?Music,films,garden etc. ?

  • im not able to enjoy anything atm , i dont know why but i just can get excited or have any enjoyment from anything, its an odd feeling, one that i have never felt before in my life....

  • I believe that this flat mood feeling can be as a direct result of the injury,a symptom of depression,or simply that your brain turns its systems way down low during repairs.I went through a few alien moods in early days- feeling empty,surreal,disconnected,no patience and extreme fatigue.Thankfully I was back to my (irritatingly !)upbeat self in a short while.Still get knackered though !I know there are a few people on here that struggle with flat moods-hopefully they can be of more help : )

  • Ho savage

    It takes awhile to adjust but stick with it. As well as limitations you will also meet new people and sotuations that you wouldnt have without this happening. You wouldnt be on here to start with. Keep going its worth it.

  • Hi savage,

    I vaguely remember being 21 (now too close to 60) and remember it being difficult to cope with being an 'adult' with delinquent teenager still bubbling underneath so to cope wth a BI at the same time has got to be extra hard.

    If you speak to your GP or Headway they should point you in the right direction for support and help with your feeling.

    A handful of antidepressants might help but won't be effective without propert psycological help, preferably from a neuropsychologist who shoul be able to help you come to terms with the changes and give you help in looking for new avenues to explore, I've just started to try and re-learn guitar after not playing for 25years as a replacement for being a drummer which I can no longer do andvtrying to sing ad well even if because of memory having to read from a script.

    I think feeling low is something we all suffer from at times and coming here to share always seems to help me.

    Take care

    Geoff

  • Hi Savage,

    Not sure if I may be suggesting anything you have considered already and don't know how your injury has affected you and what you used to enjoy doing.... I just know that there were a few things that were suggested to me that helped ..... my yoga .... some very easy gentle stretches and relaxation were so important .... maybe you could find something safe through Headway/GP ? ..... and then there was the story/plays on cd/ tape ( you won't remember what they are at your age ! :-) ) - these were useful as I couldn't concentrate to read and could replay any bits I "missed" - I used the local library ...

    And then I saw something on telly recently about colouring for adults - and SO wished someone had suggested this to me ..... just a little creativity and it doesn't have to be "right" .... I also then wondered about painting or colouring by numbers - so stress of having to choose a colour and again nothing to do wrong....

    Hope you find some positive things and perhaps some sunshine if you are able to and it's here:-)

    Good luck !

    K

    x

  • I did a bit of gardening today, it hurts physically but is SO good for my brain, it's really calming. Wonderful change from PAPERWORK, such a relief = can SEE what to do and the choices don't matter really if I do one thing or a different thing whereas paperwork I MUST do what told, have to look, read then understand then act = COMPLICATED.

    Not much to show for it but it did me good to be outside and NOT trying do papers or banking or contracts or anything complicated = a breath of fresh air in every way!

  • It will get better promise > I have suffered from a TBI for the last 51 years ago and I will be the first to admit the first 10 years were the worst , I had no support (my family were just embarrassed about me ) I was lucky I was not in a mental home - I forced myself to come out of my shell and got a part time job where I met people ( I was working (menial) and kept myself to myself )

    Have you anyone who can help you

    Regards

  • Im a bit on my own tbh, not much support, no one really knows what you are going through

  • Is there a local headway branch to visit

  • Now unfortunately i live in the countryside and cant get out anywhere, thats why i feel a bit isolated aswell i think

  • Hi Savage12345,

    Just to add to the excellent support from our members here, can I suggest you get in touch with our helpline on 0808 800 2244 (freephone) or helpline@headway.org.uk to discuss the options?

    Depending on where you live, there may be outreach or transport options, and they can discuss any support that may be available.

    Best wishes,

    Headway

  • what about community groups

    I know its hard I have been there but I have found it helps

  • Take all the proffesional help you can get, and don't like some people ever think you can do this alone. Make it your mission to improve and you will, it's hard, takes a long time, but it will happen. One day you will wake up and go crikey, I'm so much better than I was five years ago and my life is not that bad. It's our nature to survive and adapt, and look at the stories on this site, so many have been like you and moved on, it can be done and you are never alone.

  • My husband is two years older than you. After his family came in between us four months later he got in touch. It was weird because he was totally different. I still love him but he is super depressed. Wants to divorce me and his aunt stated that he never goes anyplace. He really has no friends. He is sticking to himself and living long distance from me. So, I pray he meets some people and starts to enjoy life again. It hurts me deeply that he pushed me away so easily. But I think and this is my opinion, that during this time he should be around those that love him so can cheer up. It hurts me to know he is suffering alone. Compsnionship is so very important. My feelings go out to you as well. I hope you get out of the flat mode and feel happiness again.

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