Are you over it yet?: I know I'm not... When my... - Headway

Headway

10,519 members12,821 posts

Are you over it yet?

B_S_A profile image
4 Replies

I know I'm not...

When my friend was 17 both her parents died, and we all felt terrible for her, but I remember thinking; "That's a terrible thing to happen, but why wouldn't you get over it? Why would you let it ruin your life?". She probably still goes through hell to this day.

I just can't stop thinking of those sweet months just before it happened, and it's driving me crazy. I really wish it was as simple as not thinking about it.

Written by
B_S_A profile image
B_S_A
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
4 Replies
Kirk5w7 profile image
Kirk5w7

I doubt I'll ever get over it, every day I waken and am reminded of my shortcomings now, but I'm trying not to let it define my life, otherwise I won't get the most out of my new life.

Consequently I push myself as hard as I can without going over the top, and I'm still convinced it's going to be at least five years, I'm sure my brain is relearning like it did when I was a child, if I compare my abilities with a child, some those that were damaged are at about a 6/7 year old so I've got a ways to go yet, they may never improve back to what they were but it won't be for the lack of trying. Some are already back to what they were, bonus!

The improvements have slowed now but there are still improvements.

Don't let looking backwards stop you from looking forwards xxxx Janet

Danslatete profile image
Danslatete

I spent many years desperate to wind back the clock to before it all went t#ts up.

Now it hits me when I'm having a crappy day, or I do something really stupid, or say something not appropriate.

It's what has made me who I am today. I have to be the best I can be.

My priority has all changed, I don't live to work, my job does not make me who I am. My success in life now is all about making the most of each day, doing my best and making a difference to other people.

I volunteer because I want to, not because it's all I'm likely to do.

I do my job in school, part time and minimal pay. I give all I can to the children I work with. It might only be 4-5 hours a day but to me it's more like full time and it makes my hours of air traffic seem a lifetime ago.

I think we probably all feel like turning back the clock at times but I have to work so hard on what I'm doing each day that I dont think about it as much.

amateurwriter profile image
amateurwriter in reply to Danslatete

because of my head injury I designed a t'shirt to make other people realise that you shouldn't take life for granted, I got a smiley face on one sleeve and on the other sleeve i have the words 'be happy' and then on the front of the t'shirt i have 'you're never to old to follow your dreams' and 'live life to the full because you don't know how long you have' (that one i'm not totally sure what I put but it's on them lines' and on the back i put 'don't judge a book by it's cover' and 'you only fail when you stop trying' and I try to wear it once a week so even if 1 person see's the t'shirt and takes 1 of the quotes to heart then it's worth it, I suppose if I had never had my fall then I would never have thought about helping other people in that way before, the picture of me isn't the t'shirt i designed though. I don't take the little things for granted anymore I did to a certain extent but my nan passed away when I was 12 so since then I tried not to take life for granted, but I did some days but these days I live my life to the full trying new things e.g. new food or new games, learning new things.

HELL IS ANYTHING THAT DRAMATICALLY CHANGES YOU LIFE. I'M NOT SURE YOU GET OVER THESE THINGS, YOU JUST DO YOUR BEST TO COPE & DESERVE RECOGNITION FOR DOING SO.

WE'RE ALL WISTFUL FOR THINGS IN THE PAST, I WAS ON THE WAY TO MY FAVOURITE THING WHEN I STARTED TO HAEMORRHAGE, I CAN'T HELP THINKING WHAT THINGS WOULD HAVE BEEN LIKE IF IT HADN'T HAPPENED. PEOPLE SAY YOU SHOULDN'T DO THAT BUT THINGS YOU DID IN THE PAST CAN BE VERY COMFORTING TO THINK ABOUT.

You may also like...

Feeling desperately over loaded

of unit. Do you think I should demand a new physio for him as he clearly doesn't like her and won't...

Yet more un helpful, non specific doctors comment

shutting down symptom. I was asked \\"do you think you are ok to drive\\". I responded that I...

Running water/cold sensation over the brain

there is no current understanding of why this happens. Maybe it is just the brain starting to heal...

Nothing yet

supervising officer has been absent due to covid(again you would have thought I may have been told...

Yet more unhelpful advice from a doctor (again and again)

I should be driving, when I mentioned this to the third he said I should be fine to drive. My GP...