Funeral

[richey]

Was wife grans funeral today and apart from feeling stupid in a suit and hottest day ever couldnt stop sweating i kept finding everything funny i saw the funeral director people come oot of the church thing and release butterflys everyone went dead quite and i said i wonder how they all got in there never thought was meant to relase them got few dirty looks cos couldnt stop laughing when wife told me and kept sitting dowm half way threw prayers i was like mr bean carater and said to father in law after was good that wasnt it really need to try think befire speaking

[cat3]

I'll be at my uncle's funeral tomorrow and I gather it's to be a well attended and lengthy affair. I doubt I'll be laughing (although it will be a C of E ceremony ....no comment) but in the volatile mixture of emotion and intense heat it will certainly be pretty challenging.

[Danslatete]

Sounds like me at my grandads funeral. I burst out laughing at something I had misheard in the speech bits, at my dad's funeral it wasn't so bad as it was a celebration of life and wear the brightest clothes, his coffin at the crem went down to bat out of hell and the music afterwards was always look on the bright side of life, so I started singing along, just habit I suppose.

One of the little primary one kids was upset over something in school and I just could not stop giggling, at Christmas I cried at everything, my boss was telling me something important and I said something really stupid that could have had me a written warning or worse.

Having messed up reactions Is difficult in Solomn situations. It was one of the reasons I hid away from people for years. I was an embarrassment to my family and friends.

It's getting better, I think or at least I hope.

I'm sure the people that matter understand and the rest don't matter anyway.

[iforget in reply to Danslatete]

"I'm sure the people that matter understand and the rest don't matter anyway."

Exactly so....

[zainey-lainey in reply to iforget]

fing is for me the people who do matter don't understand. unless you have had a brain poorly yourself then NO ONE understands! then no one matters!.. eee such is life x

[Boo40]

So it's not just me then....brilliant!

I miss 'social clues' all the time, and read people's expressions wrong on a daily if not hourly basis.

When my Mum, rang to tell me my Nan (on her side) had died and wasn't found for 8 months, all I could say was, ''wow what about the dog? I bet he had some of her?''.............then on the other side my emotions run riot, crying at the sound of certain music or hearing children cry...incredible!

Fortunately my mother is very accepting of my injury, and really does have the patience of a saint with some of the things I say.

The further down the road you get, the easier it becomes, not only to put in place strategies to cope, but to forget you have a BI until that is someone or something reminds you of it.

Don't forget (no pun intended) that we are all learning again, the reset button has been pressed in our heads, and we are all learning what is socially acceptable and what isn't, what works and what doesn't....although laughing at the most inappropriate moments is always acceptable in my eyes, unless of course your laughing at me!

[barny1]

Soon after my injury I recall laughing long after the joke ended and embarrassingly laughing at the most immature and inappropriate things. I'm more controlled now but occasionally I do 'let one slip' even if I know its out of place, but I don't beat myself up about it. Its called emotional disinhibition.

[pixie2308]

you are not alone.

I went to a funeral and as they were carrying the coffin down the aisle I starting to laugh. Fortunately (?) I have a chest condition so was able to cough and got to the back of the church. Went back and the vicar was unbelievable helpful to me as he said over the coffin that 'Jayne' would be saying a few words when it was in fact a gentleman called 'Shane'. I was not the only one laughing at that point.

Worse are the times when someone is in real trouble or facing some serious dilemma as all I can do then is laugh and smile. Unfortunately the more serious the more I laugh or giggle or have a 'choking cough'.

Try explaining to a daughter who does not believe you have brain injury or brain damage that you are not laughing or smiling at her problems! fail and she did not speak to me for months; and if your own daughter does not believe how can you expect the world at large to believe you? I go out less and less and speak to people less and less. My partner is a star and tells people that if they had been through a patch of what I had been through they should be so lucky to still smile at anything let alone smile at everything.

It is their problem not mine if they cannot accept.... if I were 5 it would be great but at 56 not so acceptable.