Newbie, close family friend in coma: Hi everyone... - Headway

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Newbie, close family friend in coma


Hi everyone,

My nightmare started on Sunday morning just gone, 3rd January when I received a phone call from my close family friend Johns wife saying he had collapsed at home because she had found he after she had heard crashing noises from downstairs & had been rushed to A&E. It was also touch & go, critical.

When I got to the hospital in the afternoon, I was met by his wife who took me to the ICU (Intensive Care Unit) located on the 2nd floor. The sight that met my eyes wasn't pretty. He had & is still has a loads of tubes & wires coming out of him. Also he had a bandage around his head because he had to have nureosurgery to stop the bleeding from a burst vein in his brain. One of the ICU nurses told me on my own, what the tubes & wires were for, that he is & still is critically ill in a deep coma, not medically induced & that coma patients might be able to hear. On Wednesday just gone they nearly lost him because his heart stopped for 10mins, but thankfully they managed to restart it. I was there when it happened & it scared the hell out of me!

The sad thing is his wife only gave birth to twins a boy & girl on Friday just gone, 1st January.

Johns wife has been recording sounds such as peoples voices & the twins crying etc, then playing the recordings & talking to John because we all believe that he might be able to hear.

Close friends including neighbours & I, helping Johns wife look after the twins, with food shopping & paying household bills such as gas & electric etc at this difficult time.

Will keep you all posted.


9 Replies

As someone who has recovered from a coma I can confirm that you do still hear things, they are very disjointed and come and go but I do have memories of things that were said and done in my presence. So Johns wife is doing the right things, my family asked the nurses to put my iPod on me when they couldn't be there's, on it was a selection of the music I liked and recordings of my eldest son reading to me.

Patience and time are needed, but keep strong, I was 3 weeks in that coma and had to be taught to walk and care for myself again, I was a long while before I could chew and swallow properly, I was fed by tube. I spent 5 weeks, it should have been 10 I signed myself out, in rehab a total of 3 months in hospital.

The Doctors will not commit themselves as to how well he will recover, they cannot as each brain injury is different and recovery is a personal thing.

It will be a very emotional time for you all, you must be there for one another and be prepared for a long slow journey, unfortunately it is not as depicted on films and the tv.

My thoughts and prayers are with you all.

Come back as you need to, we are here, as is Headway, to support all we can .

Love Janet x

Hi Laura. I can imagine how shocking it was for you seeing your friend in ICU. All the tubes & drips can seem scary & mysterious but I, for one, will be eternally grateful to all that paraphernalia for keeping me going throughout that critical time.

Your friend will be getting every available life-saving procedure from dedicated surgeons and medical staff and, though his progress will be slow, he has every chance of a return to a decent quality of life.

How traumatic for everyone though, that this has happened so soon after the birth of their twins ; his wife must be distraught.

But with so much support, let us hope that there are better days not far ahead.

Please update us with (hopefully) encouraging news when you can Laura. Cat x

in reply to cat3

Hello and welcome,yes as said pepole in comas can hear my hubby heard me telling him firmly to stay with us! hope he gets better very soon,pass on Headway nimber to youre friend they are fantastic!

in reply to razyheath43


Already passed on the number for headway to Johns wife & she'll be calling them on Monday. You're right about them being fantastic because I rang headway on Thursday & the lady I spoke to was very polite, understanding, honest & trustworthy about our situation.


Glad to read that! they are more than a helpline and can put you in touch with tons of support!

Hi Laura,

Yes you will find some real help and support here and my heart goes out to you and your family and prayers to John. Nick XX

in reply to MXman

Thanyou Nick


oh laura that sounds awful. Ive just noticed this is from 3 months ago. I hope you are all getting the help and support you need. lots of love.



John is back at home, has been for the last month & is getting better every day. Hopefully should be bacl at work within the next 4-6 weeks

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