Am I over-reacting?

[crissy4361]

Hi all, I had a SAH in January 2012, this followed the worst term ever with one of my groups (I'm a sixth form college teacher) and I believe that the stress they put me through was a contributory factor in what happened. When I returned to work they continued to cause me extreme stress until it was decided that I did not have to teach them anymore. They are finishing their course this month and one of their teachers is holding a party for them I declined the invitation (from the teacher not the students). She has informed me today that I need to go in at the end of the party as they have a present for me, I don't want it and because my filter no longer works as well as it did I will not be able to not say that to them which will probably result in complaints from parents and the subsequent hassle from above. Help I don't know what to do as the teacher in question thinks I am being unreasonable.

[bikerlifestyle]

no i don't think you are being unreasonable at all.

are you obliged by your contract to attend, then if not, do what you feel is best for you

i must admit, i don't know how teachers teach these days, it must be such a difficult job, especially when you have so much responsibility without hardly any authority, and a system which is always looking for someone to blame other than itself.

point that teacher to this group, and we will happily educate them to the effects of brain injury.

[crissy4361]

Thanks Bikerlifestyle for your reply. I don't think anyone at work quite understands how strongly I feel about this. The said teacher has now involved my head of department who, thankfully, understands better than most as she has had to change a lot of the ways she does things to accommodate my cognitive deficits. She is being really supportive so hopefully will get sorted. Thanks again, it helps to get an outsiders perspective.

[Lubilu01]

Crissy you are amazing to be back at work at all especially in the same environment which caused you so much stress. Hopefully you will get the support you need from the head of department and you won't have to face the situation you are dreading, good luck and well done you x

[crissy4361]

Thanks Lubilu, I love my job and was determined to go back at least to see if I could cope despite being told I would probably never work again. I have almost completed my first academic year back albeit part time now, as the fatigue forced me to reduce my hours, oh and with a million different strategies in place to counteract my cognitive deficits, x

[pollyanne]

Stick by what you feel-totally agree , you wouldnt get me there unless i had been drugged and kidnapped!!!. I go to IT lessons and have a brilliant teacher who went through what you did ( sixth form college) -he had a heart attack because of the stress and he decided it wasnt worth the hassle and now he teaches older adult learners who WANT to learn and loves his job and is so popular with the 'oldies'. i think you have done marvellous to even contemplate going back! x

[ncmurphy1951]

it is so important to keep your dignity and manners if they have gone to the trouble of buying you a present it maybe one persons idea if you dont turn up if only dor 5 mins that person will be ridiculed for suggestiung it so yes i would accept the present in good grace having pre warned you will gave to leave neil

[Pumpkin86]

That doesn't sound like an overreaction to me - everyone is different and if you don't feel comfortable with the situation then I don't think you should beat yourself up about that. Recovery is different for everyone and you have to go at your own pace - you should be proud of yourself for making the progress you have.

I hope the other teachers are able to show some understanding and give you the support you need - I agree with pollyanne - teching is a tough gig I don't know how you do it! (And I don't have a head injury to contend with either!)

[crissy4361]

Thanks Pumpkin86 and everyone else for your support and advice, sometimes I have to check its not me being unreasonable because I know I can be since the SAH. The issue was resolved quite easily by my HOD, she decided to send me on an 'errand' a slightly unnecessary one but it didn't cause me any stress or difficulty and the students and other teachers were non the wiser. Guess that's why she is good at her job. xx