Motherhood seems further everyday - Fertility, Miscar...

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Motherhood seems further everyday

MindyLowe profile image
3 Replies

Everyday it feels like motherhood is further and further from my grasp. I just want to lay down and cry. My poor fiancé does everything he can to cheer me up, and I feel guilty that I can’t muster up a convincing smile. He tries so hard, but in the end there is nothing either of us can do to make it better. Maybe it’s time to start considering the fact that we might never be parents, and actually accepting it. I try really hard to stay positive and I don’t mean to bring anyone else down. I just really need to vent. They say it will happen when you aren’t trying, have sex every day, relax. Its hard, its hard being TTC. Im depressed all the time, I can’t can’t even start trying again until my stupid period ends and it seems like that day will never come. I’m just tired of feeling so helpless.

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MindyLowe profile image
MindyLowe
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3 Replies
penny24 profile image
penny24

Hiya

It is difficult I feel your pain

We have been TTC for 3 years, had multiple procedures, been diagnosed with endometriosis and about to prepare for our 2nd round of ivf

Meanwhile my friends are on baby two

All I can say is, it will happen positive thinking

My friend is 47 had an egg donor and got pregnant ! So if she can do it we can 😉

Xx

I don't know how far along you are in terms of investigations and treatment- I hope you are under a fertility specialist.

I know how you feel- I was ttc 5 years and 10 months until my endometriosis was found and treated- once that was done we did conceive first month too but very sadly I lost the pregnancy at 4 and half weeks. We are trying again and hoping for a more successful outcome.

I can relate to how you're feeling and friends and family mean well but its not helpful responses and no that wont make you feel any better. Unless you've walked in these shoes its impossible to understand the full impact this has- it does take over.

I wont say there are any magic wands but please don't give up. I was certain it would never in a million years would we conceive but we did after 6 years of ttc so it can happen even when it feels very unlikely.- our odds were 5% after ttc for over 5 years- I'm sure your odds will be much better than that!

Sometimes taking a breather can help- it is very comsuming- go at pace you feel comfortable. Take a holiday do things as couple it can put such pressure on you both.

There is counselling service via your GP if you need to talk to someone uninvolved.

Wishing you the very best xoxo

Hannah_J profile image
Hannah_J

Hi there, I've been trying to get pregnant for 5 years, so I share your feelings. This was hard time for us... After 2 TTC failure years my husband and I went to a fertility clinic and had our fertilities checked. The fertility specialist advised us to have IVF, as it appeared to be the only way to get pregnant. Have you gone to such a clinic? Maybe you or your husband have some problems that can be treated and you might get pregnant afterwards. There are so many ways to become a parent, trust me! Never give up and don't stop!

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