Had my 1st Micarriage

Hello everyone I have just experienced my 1st miscarriage! Me and my boyfriend are very devastated about! This would have been his 1st child and my 4th but I was still excited especially it being with him! I miscarried this past Thursday and have seen a few clots and a nice sized hard bloody plum looking seed after that my bleeding has went way down I'm spotting as of now I was 6wks and 2 days. I want to try again any advice and success stories that can support us thru this rough patch? He feels he can't have children at all now and has told me our future together looks dim now because I miscarried and I really love him he says he loves me more than I know but doesn't feel the same about our relationship now any advice for this also fellas plz? And can we try again? How soon? Can we have intercourse while spotting? And how about baths right now? How long did u all bleed? & how long did u all actually wait for sex and ttc again? Thanks in advance!

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10 Replies

  • Thank u so much and im keeping my hope thats all i have and positive thoughts

  • Hello dear sorry to read your story ......... I just want to say that never lose your hope and consult your doctor about it. She will definitely guide you better after examining your reports.

  • I want to say how sorry I am to hear of your loss. I went through an early miscarriage in July after TTC for 6 years. It is devastating.

    I lost my pregnancy just after 4 weeks and I had to wait for a 6 week scan to confirm what I already knew- I had lost the pregnancy- there was no evidence of a Pregnancy. As I didn't have any left over Pregnancy content the gynae doctor at the Early Pregnancy Unit told me it was perfectly fine to try after my next period. I was told to expect the period to be heavier and longer than usual and it was. My period arrived exactly at 28 days which is my normal cycle length. Prior to that I had cramping and spotting a week before my period- but I have endometriosis which played up after I had conceived. We started trying after my period we both felt ready to.

    I would double check with your GP/ Fertility specialist when you can try again.

    I don't have a success story yet but we are trying again as by me conceiving has given us huge hope it can happen! I have contacted our consultant to see if there is any other medication we can take- one threatened miscarriage with my son, and this loss. I'm already taking Prednisone and progesterone pessaries ( from positive test to 12 weeks,). I don't know if the drs have given any additional medication to support a Pregnancy? Mine might be different as I have endometriosis. I'm also taking pregnacare, folic acid and folate. I drink lots of lactose free milk too as well eating a very healthy diet. But I'm sure you do thst. I also heard Marmite can prevent miscarriages.

    It is difficult when we don't know the reason for the loss.

    As for your boyfriend it is hard for them- the focus is on the women and people forget that it was just as much their child as it was yours. Also I think with men is they like to be the strong ones protecting us. My husband has played that role over the years- I used to wonder if he even wanted a child but I saw how much it meant to him when I conceived. My husband also has no children- I have a grown up son of 18 from a previous relationship. My hubby has been able to off load to a friend about it- which has helped.

    There is no reason to suggest just because you lost this pregnancy does not mean you would lose another one. I saw an article from BBC health about miscarriage- you are less likely to suffer another miscarriage if you fall within 6 months of a miscarriage. The more I thought about it the more it made sense- nature wants to compensate for the loss.

    It is ultimately yours and your boyfriend's decision when you feel ready to start again-only you will know xoxo

  • Thank u so much for ur advice and sharing ur story i am also sorry for ur lost and im going to wait it and and get the okay from my doc 1st and i hope things go great for u all! Good luck and lots o bby dust

  • That sounds like a good idea. Things can take a bit of time to settle down .Its definitely good to get the all clear from the medics.

    My Fertility consultant has written to you and is talking about referring me to a miscarriage clinic (I've only had one miscarriage and one threatened miscarriage) and is arranging an appointment to discuss- I didn't know if that be of might help you. I always thought you had have 3 or more so I'm surprised he's competing it.

    All the best and thank you- hope to hear some happy news from you too xoxo

  • We will both get blessed with some good news as long as we're patient and have love and support and great advice from great ppl like you! Thank u so much ill keep u posted

  • Sorry to read his..... Sending lots of hugs......... It's a destiny dear. everyone fails in front of his/ her destiny. But I would like to say that it totally depends on you that how to change your destiny??? Take your own time dear ....... be strong and stay positive ....... Consult an expert and follow her advice...... There are many treatments available in medical science.Hope for the best. Good Luck!!!

  • I am very sorry to hear your loss. But these unfortunate events are a part of life. I would suggest you to be patient and strong. I also had a miscarriage. It was my first baby. I lost it due to chromosomal disorder. Doctor further told me that i can not deliver a healthy baby. I was completely shattered after this news. My husband is supportive. He is asking me to go for surrogacy. It is by far a helpful technique for infertile. In your case I would suggest you to wait for a while. I think you should give some rest to your body.

  • He called mine a spontaneous miscarriage...... He told me we can try again right away after i stopped bleeding or after my 1st menstrual cycle but we have decided to wait and get thru this tough time and support each other... Thank u and i am sryy for ur lost as well and i pray everything goes great with you alls decision

  • So sorry to hear that. May god bless u. xx

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