im 43 and i have 23 year old daughter - Fertility Network UK

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im 43 and i have 23 year old daughter

jayjay731 profile image
7 Replies

i have been trying for 4 years had miscarriage 2010, and im losing all hope the fertil ity clinic didnt offer me any help please can someone help me

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jayjay731
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7 Replies
Ambrose1 profile image
Ambrose1

Sorry to hear you are having issues, i am going private and going to a place called Fertility Care they area excellent, very attentive and care very much.

I wish you well

With Regards

Hi JayJay, what help are you looking for? Sorry to hear that you are having difficulties.

The NICE guidelines have recently changed with regard to NHS provision, but this only applies for people up to 42 years of age. Therefore, you won't be able to get help from the state to acheive the pregnancy you desire. The reason that this is the case, is it is likely that your egg quality will be fairly low given your age, therefore the likelihood of a successful outcome using your eggs will be very low. You may therefore need to consider egg donation. You will also need your partners sperm checked out, and it could be that further support is needed as well.

This is a lot to think about. You mention that the fertility clinic didn't help - did they explain any of this to you? You will need to self fund the egg donation IVF, and it can be expensive. You may want to go back to the clinic to discuss this - you need a clear diagnosis if this is feasible. There are then a number of different options to going forward with your treatment - in the UK or overseas. The Donor Conception Network might be able to help with understanding all the consequences of this

Other options open to you would be IVF (depending on your consultants view) using your eggs, adoption, or walking away and beginning to accept that this longed for child won't be coming. If you go for the latter route, you may wish to look at More To Life who will be able to offer support.

Hawksworth profile image
Hawksworth

Hi, I'm sorry to hear you have had no help. All I can advise is don't give up! I am 39 and have just paid for 1 cycle of IVF, they told me it probably wouldn't work so wouldn't fund on NHS, after 1 cycle I am now 19 weeks pregnant. It took me 2 years after being told there was no hope to do something about it. You need to exhaust every option so you don't look back in years to come and think what if I'd done that. You need to go back to the clinic and demand they give you all the information you need to make some decisions. Good luck!

Treacle profile image
Treacle

Hi Jayjay

Like the other ladies, I'd need to know what you're specifically looking for help with, before I know if I can say anything to help you.

I'm really surprised that the fertility clinic you're using aren't helping you as its their job to! - as Flowergirl said, is it because you need funding and they can't provide it? I'm sure you will really struggle to get any funding due to your age but if you can afford some assisted fertility help, I'm sure we can help you find out what direction to go in.

I'm 38 and have already had 2 cycles of ICSI with donor eggs after failing with my own eggs - so if thats a possible avenue for you, I'll help if I can, certainly with the early questions that often come up

There's some lovely people on here to talk to

Treacle

xx

jayjay731 profile image
jayjay731 in reply to Treacle

i want to have children with my own eggs not donor sorry, i dont know would i stilll have eggs to get me pregnant at my age? oh im so confused, i went to fertility she was puttin me on clomid then done tests and said that it mite be worse than better, but i would try anything, please help i was actually going to buy them online, help please

DianeArnold profile image
DianeArnoldPartnerNurseFertility Network UK

Hi Jayjay. All I would add to the “above” replies is that perhaps you go back to your GP and ask him/her to check your hormone levels again. Your FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) level on day 2 of your menstrual cycle. This would then give you an idea as to whether you are still fertile or not, as your fertility does start to decline at around 36-38 years of age. The result should read between 2 and 10. Regarding buying Clomid on the Internet, I would strongly advise against this, as you need to be monitored whilst on the drug. Regards Diane

helptoday profile image
helptoday

I had my first child at 40 through the help of a Chinese Herbal Medicine doctor if you would like her details and other treatment options see our website infertilityhelptoday.com Good Luck.

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