Taking time off as a teacher. Exam clashes. Advice please

[Cuppppatea]

I’m doing long term supply work. I teach food and the gcse exam is booked for what now looks to be right in the middle of my next cycle. They are full on intense days of cooking and ingredients are all ordered in before - it’s a big deal.

I have counted the day I’ve been booked in for my scan after down reg as day one - (but period could indeed come sooner or later. Moving it either side.

If all goes to plan exams would fall on day 5 and 8 . They can’t happen without me.

Last time my scans were on day 7 and day 10. It’s looking likely exam days could be scan days due to where the weekend falls.

I don’t really want to tell the school I am having ivf and I need a way to work this. I can’t really just take the day off last minute and let them down … it’s too risky to leave it to chance, but how to I explain the days off in advance.

Also I’m worried about how I will feel on the medication- if I’ll be able to go in at all. Would I just take a whole chunk of time

Off with ‘covid’? I don’t get paid if I don’t go in, not entitled to sick pay.

[Darcy1996]

gosh that’s stressful. Are you entitled to any paid leave on your contract? I’ve just posted a similar themed question…could you suddenly need a smear? Sadly a funeral or is that too bleak…

[paintthesky]

that’s such a hard situation! I’m a teacher too and I had to self isolate when I went through my cycles. I did tell my head though.

Is there any way the exams can be moved?

[Cuppppatea in reply to paintthesky]

Why did you have to self isolate?

[paintthesky in reply to Cuppppatea]

It was Covid times!

[PicklePar]

Hi Cuppppatea

It’s very stressful trying to arrange IVF - I’ve wanted a baby for so long but even find myself getting annoyed with having to arrange life around it and when I dig into ‘why’ it all stems from guilt and letting people down.

It’s not as black and white as this but sometimes polarising views can help - work is work and your family is the priority. You should not feel stressed, under pressure or at worst stop or miss your treatment (easier said then done) but keep focused on what matters to you. Everyone is replaceable in a work context, you are not replaceable in your life.

I stick with an honesty as a best policy approach - tell them, give them notice. At least they can make a decision/ arrange a supply cover etc - it really isn’t YOUR problem to solve, your happiness and wellbeing is.

Good luck

[Cuppppatea in reply to PicklePar]

The only problem with honestly is that they will be advertising the job soon and I don’t want the fact I could be pregnant to ruin my chances

[PicklePar in reply to Cuppppatea]

You know the environment and the culture and whether they would factor in a pregnancy to their decision making (albeit discrimination). If you don’t think they would be supportive then sickness is an option or a planned medical appointment (that would need be linked).

If you have been there a while and have shown how great you are then I very much doubt it will matter. Working in HR I’ve recruited a good few pregnant women and always based on who is best for the role. Good luck with which ever way you decide to go.

[Lamagarden]

I’m a teacher and during my first round of IVF I reluctantly told the new head and it was a mistake as I was discriminated against. Wish I hadn’t. Of course it depends on the head but with the state of education I don’t think it wise to let them know. Could the scans be moved to the day before/after or early in the morning? Is the clinic near school? The very early scans are not so time sensitive I thought. My clinic sometimes does Saturday scans depending on who is on rota. I’m guessing you don’t have someone at school that can step in? If not, isn’t that an oversight by school as you could suddenly come down with Covid or a tummy bug. Best of luck, I know it’s a tricky situation xx

[Cuppppatea in reply to Lamagarden]

Thanks for your reply - it’s more that I don’t really know when the scans will be yet either - one is pencilled in for Monday the first day of my bleed - but the mid treatment scans could be any time….. im Defo not going to tell them now. Thanks for sharing your experience

[Eggfreezer2015]

I’m not in teaching but could you say that you have an upcoming medical procedure and due to NHS waiting lists they are anticipating it to be on xxx and you’re waiting for confirmation and can’t postpone. In everyone’s interest can planned cover be organised? You could then get a sick note from your GP stating medical procedure to cover yourself?

[Aansey]

Hello Cuppppatea ,

As a fellow teacher I understand the pressures of work and exams which are of course more challenging when on a supply contract. I had two rounds last academic year which were sadly unsuccessful - I battled through work despite the daily stresses. As I’m now in my another (which will likely be my last opportunity) I made the difficult decision to take time off work which my GP supported. I felt a huge amount of guilt for missing my exam groups but at the end of the day we have to find balance and sometimes prioritise ourselves. Thankfully my LM and Head have been really understanding.

Taking time off might not be an option for you but please do put yourself first - exam dates can change and others can step in to help. As others suggest I’m sure your GP could support.

In regards to the job being advertised and (let’s hope) you are pregnant then this can’t prevent you from being appointed as this would be direct discrimination.

All the best!!

[AJKP]

HelloI cant quite offer advice in your area, but I understand the struggle as I work in mental health so I'm committed to the work I do too. Last year I tried to juggle the work and ivf and it was really stressful, so for my final ivf round I've decided to take a chunk of time off.

Could you do any private tutoring to cover income for a little while? I have told my work so that they can be supportive. But I've realised this year as time isn't on my side I need to put myself first.

Hopefully you can find a balance that works for you, sending lots of positive vibes on your journey 🥰

[WillowPark]

Hi, it is definitely worth discussing with your clinic as moving scans a day or two seems to be quite alright so they may be able to solve this for you and take the stress away. They also might be able to accommodate scans at other times of day to suit. I usually advocate putting yourself and family first when it comes to work things but fully understand these exams are a big deal to your students so it is tricky. Maybe speaking to the clinic and knowing there is flexibility will help. Also, you probably will not feel 100% but the chances of you being so unwell as to not manage in to work is really quite slim, so try not to worry about it. At that stage you will be able to take painkillers too if you need them for headaches etc x

[-Cupcake]

I have just been invited for an interview for a new job right in the middle of possible egg collection - I mentioned it to the clinic and they said 'don't worry, we can work around that' - so definitely share your issue with the clinic. And best of luck!

[Cuppppatea]

Thanks so much for your reply. I've told them now - just said hospital appointment 'not yet confirmed' MAY fall on exam dates. They wont change the exam dates and have found someone to take it if im not in. As a supply teacher I dont actually have to give them any reason so thats a bonus