I am looking for a support buddy

[Leyla1989]

I am surrounded with people who have children and who have no experience of what it feels like going through infertility. I would like to buddy up and meet with someone going through infertility - it isn’t a must which form but it would be helpful to meet with someone who has male factor infertility - azoospermia It would be good to make friends with someone going through this - this will help in supporting each other in this journey. X

[Anim88]

Meeting in person and having a support group would be amazing... maybe something like that is offered?

[Leyla1989 in reply to Anim88]

But where? 😀

[Bomboncita]

Hi, I'm not in the UK but if you ever want to chat with me I'll be happy.

My partner has had several diagnosis over the last 3 years including azoospermia. Hard to believe considering that he had two kids from a previous marriage. Anyway, the good news is that with supplements, a healthy diet and exercise his numbers improved. They are still below the levels indicated by WHO but hey, enough for ICSI.

So back to the main point, if you need to vent and would like to drop me a line, I'd be happy to write to you.

Hugs.

[Leyla1989 in reply to Bomboncita]

Thank you for your reply so nice to hear from you and that his count has improved! That is great news 😍

Do you mind me asking what form of azoospermia he has been diagnosed with? It sounds like a Non obstructive - hormone related type.

That is strange how he has had children before! The human body is a wonder isn’t it!

I hope this works out well for you - I am sending you my hugs and kisses!!! Where do you live?

My partner has had no prior children - it just hurts to see him going through this and the realisation that I may not have a biological child if his micro tese is unsuccessful. We will then I suppose consider a donor but we want to exhaust our options first.

Has your partner done a Micro tese?

[Bomboncita in reply to Leyla1989]

Hia,I'll try to summarise as best as I can:

After ttc for a year, following the recommendation of my gynecologist, we went to see an expert. The urologist told us that my partner had an infection and so he treated him with antibiotics. The first analysis showed 0 sperm. Heartbreaking.

Then after the treatment, to our surprise things did not improve much and he was diagnosed with non-obstructive azoospermia. They also checked for varicocele but everything seemed ok.

I remember that that was a difficult time for us (I felt so lonely). We were confused and couldn't explain what was going on. Aside of the complicated terminology (I had never heard of such things) we were shocked with the situation as he has two kids from a previous marriage 20 years ago. For the record, just in case you are wondering, the kids look like him. I don't mean to offend, it's just that some people have made the comment before...

So like I said, the kids are now 23 and 21 and it just shows that the clock can also tick for men (he is 47 now). Who knows what happened during these 20 years to affect his sperm count, motility and morphology.

So, back to the diagnosis. From azoospermia it went to teratozoospermia and

after several iterations and visits to different experts for months and months, we then learnt that he could have the TESE. I remember that we even got an appointment two years ago for his surgery. The plan was that he would have it done during the Christmas break, and while we waited, he decided to go on a strict diet for 3 months starting around September time (i.e. fish, fresh vegetables (brussel sprouts, cabagge, lettuce, spinach, etc), water, fruit, olive oil, quinoa, lentils, etc.), no alcohol, started jogging 3 times a week, took supplements and cold showers. I know it sounds like a big sacrifice but after three months his numbers went up significantly and he felt better. This gave us hope!

So when the doctors found out that the numbers went up they told that he no longer needed the TESE as we could try with ICSI. We are still trying and I hope that we will get lucky one day. I'm 43 so I guess that my egg quality is not the best unfortunately. This makes things harder but we are determined to continue trying.

Anyway, what's important for you is that you go to a good specialist in your city and that your loved one takes good care of himself (healthy diet, sleep, exercise and to try and stay POSITIVE). I believe that there are cases out there (you can even google them) that show that pregnancy with TESE is possible so please stay positive!

Sending you both lots of love and positive energy from Germany.

Please contact me whenever you want.

All the best XXX

[HedgehogMad]

Hi Leyla! Whereabouts in UK are you based? We also have MFI

[Leyla1989 in reply to HedgehogMad]

so sorry for the very late reply - I haven’t been so well I am in north London - in Harrow - what about you? x

[AlannahK]

Hi Leyla,

I’m so sorry you’re both going through this - if you do need someone to chat to please reach out!

My partner also was diagnosed with Azoospermia last September and I can certainly relate to how you’re feeling!

We’ve just completed his MTese surgery so if you want to ask any questions please do let me know! We’ve no children and doing everything down the NHS route if it helps!

Hope you’re both ok and keeping my fingers crossed for you for a successful surgery 🤞🏻

[CyclingAddict in reply to AlannahK]

Hi Alannah,

I know your message wasn't for me but I'd love to chat. My husband and I have been going through IVF for just over a year due to male factor infertility. X

[AlannahK in reply to CyclingAddict]

Hi so sorry for the late reply - absolutely feel free to message me - it’s comforting to chat to people in this unfortunate situation and certainly helps you feel less alone x

[Leyla1989 in reply to AlannahK]

very sorry for the late reply - I haven’t been so well. Thank you for your message - I notice your message was 3 months ago - how did the surgery go? I hope all well x

[AlannahK in reply to Leyla1989]

Hi leyla - honestly don’t worry! I’m so sorry to hear you’ve not been well please do feel free to message to and I hope things start feeling better soon!

We had no idea what was causing the Azoospermia but the surgery went well and we have some stored now and I’m currently going through my first ICSI cycle. Please don’t give up hope - only a few months ago I never thought we’d ever make it to this point. our relationship became incredibly tough and I wasn’t even sure if we’d still be together no matter what the outcome was as it’s so hard to support your partner when your heart is also broken. Things get easier and I found real help in making time to talk and do the things we love.

I’m not sure where you are on your journey but just remember no matter how much you stress you cannot control the outcome of the situation - just focus on you and him and I hope things improve for you both x

[CyclingAddict]

Hi Leyla, me and my husband have been going through IVF for just over a year due to male factor infertility. I'm based in the UK and would be happy to talk x

[Minniemouse88]

Hi Leyla,

I would love to have a buddy, feel free to get in touch. I'm feeling exactly the way you describe at the moment and we are facing similar challenges to you. In fact, I just logged on to the forum tonight to seek a buddy myself. Sorry you are both going through this. It is so painful, we know.

My husband has been diagnosed with Azoospermia (March this year)and it was quite a shock as I was convinced the reason we weren't getting pregnant was because if me. He had Surgical Sperm retrieval on 27th September and they found a very small number in testicles. Not enough to freeze. We're waiting to hear from the consultant as to whether it is possible for us to go ahead with icsi, but it's a long and draining process.

It's definitely a process that is bringing us even closer together and I am realising just how much I love my man!

Take good care and message me whenever. Happy to buddy up in this lonely journey!

Jen 🙂

[Minniemouse88]

Just realized that you posted 3 months ago 🤭so things may have changed. Hope all is going well and the offer still stands! I'm also UK based (Yorkshire)