***Sensitive*** BFP that ended in miscarriage

After 2 IVF rounds. One failed and one that ended in 2 frozen embryos. We found out on Tuesday through a beta Hcg that I'm pregnant. Results coming with a hcg of 130 iu/l. My clinic wanted to see anything above 50iu/l. On Wednesday did a digital test that showed 2-3 meaning 4-5 weeks. Just on track, me being 4 weeks and 1 day. On Friday something was off. My only persistent symptom...sore breast...went away! I knew something was wrong. Saturday did another digital, came back showing 1-2 meaning 3-4 weeks pregnant. My Hcg was lower. Sunday I started having a brown spotting only when I wiped but today I woke up having a full heavy bleeding with cramping. Our little seed decided to leave us. 2 years ago just a few days before Christmas we found that we'll never be able to conceive naturally and now our miracle left us just before Christmas as well. I feel so numb, empty and no good for nothing! I don't even have any tears left. I hate my clinic, they want me tomorrow to go for another Hcg blood test and IF it's negative they'll send me the new program with what we need to do afterwards. What better confirmation than this blood dripping from me? I hate that "IF". It's a "YES" the embryo stopped developing and you're having a miscarriage. Sorry for the long story but talking makes me feel better!

[MrsOrangejuice]

I'm so, so sorry. This happened twice to us this year on back to back transfers. My first clinic was very insensitive and didn't even offer us a follow-up call for months, by then we'd had another collection and transfer at a different clinic. The second clinic was better and also told us to try and see the positives and that if it implanted and started developing, this ruled out a lot of potential problems and meant a lot of tests were unnecessary. It certainly didn't feel like that at the time or right that they said it was just chance and to keep going - we'd been trying for 7 years and never had a natural positive pregnancy test so having it taken away was hard. If the second HCG confirms your loss, there's probably not much that can make it better right now - I had already worked out due dates and was so excited about telling my family, so just went numb - but the thing that helped was having discussions with our consultant to make sure we had tried everything we could, changing a few things and starting again so we had something to hope for and concentrate on. That may not be the right thing for you and maybe it's just too early to even think about now - I'm older than you and you may just want to take some time to process.

[Squareark]

Im so sorry, sending you an e-hug and my best wishes.

[KiboXX]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, it’s awful and I can completely understand your frustration with having to go for another blood test.

I’ve had the same thing happen on my first IVF cycle and I was devastated. The only thing I will say is I had a clear blue weeks test go backwards from 2-3 to 1-2 on my most recent fifth transfer, the tests were done two days apart so I cried and knew it was over because I’d been through it before but actually a repeat hcg blood test showed my levels were rising. I also had a huge bleed which turned out to be a haematoma. The pregnancy has progressed since with no more issues.

I’m not at all trying to fill you with any false hope because I know that’s not what you need right now but there is a reason your clinic is want to repeat your bloods and that’s just to be certain that your levels are falling and confirm it’s a miscarriage. Those weeks tests aren’t as accurate as a blood test.

Sending you a huge hug today xxx

[Hidden in reply to KiboXX]

Thank you sweetie! I had a lot of cramps and bleed quite much. It finally stopped but no cloths came out. I hope this doesn't mean I'll bleed for too many days. Sending you lots for hugs too and I'm happy your pregnancy went well afterwards.

[GiantPanda]

So, so sorry this has happened. I have been in a similar place, finding out at an early private scan, then NHS EPU making me have another scan, and then wait a week to confirm with another scan before discussing next steps. It feels beyond cruel, and my heart goes out to you. That I had got pregnant was my only solace, and has given me courage to keep trying, so I hope you'll be back there and have future success. Xx

[Hidden in reply to GiantPanda]

My heart goes out to you! Nobody should go through something like this. Thank you soo much for your words. It means a lot!!! I'm happy that my bleeding has stopped and the cramps went away. I even went on a little walk.

[Positivechangeplease]

I’m really sorry for you. It’s so hard isn’t it? Especially when you’re convinced it’s over and you don’t need another confirmation. Look after yourself ❤️

[Hidden in reply to Positivechangeplease]

Thanks dear for your kind words! Nobody deserves to go through something like this. Life isn't fair!!!!

[Bozo_the_pumpkin]

Sending you loads of hugs xx this is such a devastating thing to go through. I had an mmc and only found out 3 days before my 12 week scan that the embryo stopped growing at 6.5 weeks. Also had to go for a confirmation scan a week later but it is better to be sure

[Hidden in reply to Bozo_the_pumpkin]

Ohh you poor thing! Sooo sad. It's devastating to go through something like this. I need time to heal my soul. 🥰😍 sending lots of hugs to you too