Hiya š Please could you guys give me some advice as I am doing my head in thinking about that this! (Sorry for long post)
I have started down reg for my FET next month and I was accepting of my doctors plan until I spoke to a counsellor today and she made me question a couple things - now Iām more confused than I was before my session!
This will be my 5th transfer. Iāve had two fails with day 5ās and 2 fails with day 3ās. I seem to have an issue with my body absorbing progesterone pessaries and my last fail my progesterone was almost zero on test day.
Iāve also spent over a year finding a protocol that actually produces good quality eggs/embryos and my last one was the first time Iāve had anything to freeze/good quality blasts (we got 7).
Anyway, my dr said for this FET she would put back two embryos - the two top graded ones.
My counsellor questioned why she would do that and not put back one high grade and one low grade instead... That had been a thought I had also had but when I asked my dr she said theyād do that to give me the best chance of success.
I would like to try a double transfer at this point but am worried if it doesnāt work I will have lost both top graded ones..
Not sure whatās the best thing to do is??
I also thought itād be time for an ERA now but my dr said I should try a FET first, where they will monitor my progesterone daily and give me Lubion, and if needed intramuscular injections. Her logic for that was due to me only having had two failures from day 5 embryos - she didnāt rate the quality of the two 3 day embryos at all so doesnāt include them so therefore Ive only had two āproperā fails In her eyes I suppose.
I feel really confused as to what to do now.
My partner wants to go ahead with the FET and leave the ERA til later because he trusts the dr, and because of the money (always one of his issues with this stuff and to push him on it causes arguments where I just end up upset).
This whole journey is making my head explode and I question my judgement so I decided Iād ask you all what you would do in my position!? X
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Aussie83
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My feelings is youāve chosen the clinic because you trust the medics! Iād trust your doctor, they are what you are paying for, but maybe chat through your concerns with them.
It's such a tough journey, but I'd agree with PP and say trust your doctor. I recently had two embryos put back in a FET and asked the same question about using my two top graded. My consultant and the embryologist both said using different graded embryos can have a negative impact on both. I had a look online and found studies that supported this idea, so decided to go ahead with two top rated. I got my BFP last week, so fingers crossed this one works. Good luck xx
This can be such a rollercoaster and take such an emotional toll that you end up losing your bearings. You can start questioning and re-questioning every thing / including yourself and your doctor. My clinic has a policy of only putting in a single embryo at a time / which at least means the decision is out of my hands. The best placed person to give you advice is your Fertility Doctor Iām afraid. Each woman is different and they have a different ivf journey so what works for one wonāt work for another ; it depends on so many things that hopefully your doctor has considered. But never ever be afraid to ask your Dr questions and they shouldnāt make you feel bad for doing so. Iām always intimidated by doctors and when Iām too scared I get my partner to do it. Tell your doctor about your concerns and see if that help. Doctors do this so often then they can forget that thereās a frightened human behind this so just try and ask them again. Donāt forget youāre the client - you have every right to just ask.
Thank you, that is so true. I really have gotten to the point of mass confusion with this journey. I almost wish my clinic had that policy too so I didnāt have to decide!
Youāre right, I will speak to my dr again just to clear my head.
I really wish my counsellor hadnāt put these thoughts in my head..I know she is trying to support me but geez, not helpful at all mentally! x
I know right. She may have been trying to help but unless sheās medically qualified fertility doctor she might need to learn to keep her opinions to herself. She had to realise we are ALL on high alert and very sensitive at this point.Anyway Iām honestly wishing you the best of luck. We are rooting for you !
You need to speak with your Consultant and put all them questions/concerns to her. It can all be really confusing and it is natural to second guess decisions that are made for us on meds etc due to this whole IVF process being so vital to get right for each of us. I know in the past when I was unsettled about decisions my Consultant made, finding out exactly why/how he came to making them, helped me alot.If you come to a stage where you cannot see/understand your Consultants logic, there will be trust issues and time for you to seek out another Consultant/Clinic.
Best of luck to you. It is a very tough road we are all on xx
Thank you, you are most definately right! And I do trust her, the counsellor just made me question everything which Iām not sure is that helpful really.. thanks for the advice x
Hi Aussie, I'm not surprised you're stressed, it's such a touch journey! I agree with the posters above - have open conversations with the doctor. Recent research shows that if you were to put back two embryos of different qualities it's possible that your body might focus on the lower quality embryo and should it be non-viable, this may lead to losing both. You have higher chances of two similar quality embryos being put back in together. I agree at this point try and trust your doctor. It's so hard, I know it from experience, but I think one of the key lessons infertility and IVF teaches us is surrender. Easy to say for someone who likes to be in control! Keeping my fingers crossed for you - keep us posted! x
Wow if thatās the case it sounds like my dr is correct... I mean I do trust her and know sheās doing the best thing but when people put in their two cents it makes you second guess everything, grr!
I want to give my embryos the best chance of success.
Really appreciate the kind words and advice - I feel a weight lifted after getting everyoneās advice x
Not sure about embryo grading and putting 2 back in (bit naughty of the counsellor to be asking those questions, she is not medical) but just wanted to say my consultant really seems to rate Lubion injections - I will be on it as well as pessaries for my first FET all being well. There has never been issues with progesterone he just likes to cover all bases - I hope it does the trick for us both!Good luck x
Heya! Sorry youāre stuck in this decision making overload situation - I have been there too. Can I check what your embryo grades are? And also what protocol switch you did? 7 blasts is great! And I canāt quite understand the logic of switching away from a single transfer at this point in your treatment.. do you mind having twins?
Thank you. Yeah for sure, i have 5bb, 5bb, 2aa, 4bb, 3bb, 3ab and 3bb.
We switched to the med Pergoveris which seemed to make all the difference for us. Itās super expensive but worth it. Can give you more details if you like.
Yeah I think my dr wanted to try a double because Iāve had so many failures. I keep going back and forth about it tbh!
šš»šš»šš»From the studies Iāve read they all sound like they fit into the āgood qualityā category except the 2AA (which I understand could change into a 5AA overnight) and from what Iāve read there isnāt a big difference in implantation rates between all of them, even compared to āexcellent qualityā ones >3AA. So I think youāre in a very strong position - yay for that gold protocol! This study supports single embryo transfers in good quality ones but your specialist should have more up to date and comprehensive data behind their recommendation ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articl...
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