Was told today that ivf is the best option due to male and female factor infertility.
My husband wants to wait for another 6 months due to him having lost weight and being less stressed since his semen Analysis.
I'm already exhausted and sad about the month by month disappointment a s scared about how long this will continue to go on.
How to people keep their morale up and how do you decide when to take the ivf plunge. Unfortunately it isn't available on nhs where I am
Hello again! Difficult one when your husband wants to wait longer. Mine let me take the lead as I had reached a point where I "snapped" (in a way) and couldn't take any longer on the month to month disappointment. Also, as it's me going through it physically, and me paying for it (I don't know if that makes a difference), he really felt it was up to me the route we take. He's also really easy-going, though. Have you spoken to your husband about how sad and exhausted you are with the month to month disappointment?
Morale is up and down, I'd say, but just have to keep going at this point. I probably have a lot more bad days than good, but the determination is there. Lots of love. xxx
Thank you, I think my husband is just a very logical thinker whereas I'm more emotion led, and as you said going though it month by month with all the physical reminders too.
I see where he is coming from as it would be such a joy to do it naturally but equally I feel tired.
I tried to explain how I felt emotionally but my husband says I'm catastrophizing.
Doing it naturally would still be my preference, but the joy might have gone out of it a bit... Also, going through IVF doesn't stop you trying naturally! xx
From my personal experience I would say start as soon as you can as it can be a long process (but hopefully won’t be for you) as long as you feel ready in yourself! We regret not starting sooner and trying to wait for the perfect time. There is always something life throws at you! If you both get into it and feel it’s too much you can always have a break during it but at least you will know what to expect etc. Hard though if your husband doesn’t want to, I guess you will need to find a compromise as it sounds like his 6 months of destressing might cause you even more sadness and exhaustion? For me the feeling of actually doing something positive to try to get pregnant really helps mentally too and the build up to a cycle can even be a little exciting but IVF can take it’s toll emotionally too Xx
Hi. My advice is to start the process. I was 38/39 when I started to seriously looking into ivf but that was through the nhs. By the time all pre assessments were done and I actually got started on ivf, I was 40.
I actually wish I had done an egg collection and frozen those eggs in my mid 30s. It would have meant that I could have still have tried naturally but also had something as a back up. So you could look at doing the egg collection & freezing? Then the eggs are there IF you need them in the future? Your husband wouldn’t be needed at all, unless you were freezing embryos. It is just a thought. Then it feels like you are doing something but also taking some pressure off your husband meantime? x x
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