***Sensitive post*** Miscarriage and Me - Fertility Network UK

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***Sensitive post*** Miscarriage and Me

cryst4l
cryst4l

Hi Ladies, sorry for the sensitive post. I wasnt sure who to turn to. I have just suffered a missed miscarriage from my first ivf cycle and I chose the natural process to miscarry. I started bleeding heavily yesterday with clots and later that day I passed something which I was too upset to look at it so had to ask my husband to check. I am no longer bleeding heavily and it has subsided but my womb pain/cramping has increased drastically. It gets worse each time I go to the toilet to empty my bowel but the cramping is severe. Should I be worried? Is this normal? I have a scan in 2 weeks but I dont know what I should be expecting whilst going through this awful time. Any feedback, advice and experiences would be appreciated. Feeling alone going through this 😢

Xx

32 Replies
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So sorry your going through this my love. First of all don't ever be sorry for posting asking for advice, lots of us have been there including myself and we're here to help if we can, the, fact your doing it naturally will cause you to be in pain hun for a while possibly days upto a, week on and off due to the womb contracting and expelling the lining etc. You will Start to bleed heavily everytime something wants to pass and is on it's way it will hurt but if your filling a pad every hour and your feeling dizzy faint then get to a n e. From what your saying I think the main part has happened they might be some placental tissue to come and the rest will be your lining as it will be thicker. Your body is very good at doing what it's supposed to do. If for any reason your worried or you get High temp soak a pad in an hour feel faint don't hesitate and get to a n e.

I wish you get through this physical side of things quickly so you can have your time to grieve and rest. Drink and eat plenty keep your nutrition up and take pain relief if necessary use hot water bottle also.

Big, gentle hugs and lots of love

😘😘💝💝

Thanks hun, appreciate your reply and advice. 💕xx

I had absolutely awful cramping and contractions with my first miscarriage. Most people seem to have much less pain (and so did I for my second miscarriage) but some of us are unlucky. I got the dr to prescribe me codeine and that was quite helpful, I took it alongside ibuprofen/paracetamol. I had two weeks off work due to feeing so poorly (before this I had always assumed people had time off because they were emotional not because they were in physical pain!). My advice would be to demand painkillers and use a hot water bottle on your tummy if you can bear it in this heat. And DO NOT go back to work until you are fully better x

Thanks hun. I stopped working as I started this journey thankfully. Taking pain relief too. Will get codeine from doc if I need to. Hope you are ok xx

Hidden
Hidden

I can't give any advice as I haven't chosen to miscarry naturally but wanted to send you love & hugs. I'm hoping the worst is over for you sweetheart. Miscarriage really is an awful & lonely time xx

cryst4l
cryst4l
in reply to Hidden

Thanks lovey. I hope the worst is over too. No woman should have to go through this xx

I’m so sorry you are going through this heartbreak. The ladies have given brilliant advice I don’t think there is anything else I can add to the mix. Definitely don’t feel guilty for needing to post/ask. I just wish I could give you a huge cuddle. We are all here for you whenever you need us ❤️ xoxo

cryst4l
cryst4l
in reply to jess1981

Hey Jess, thanks my love. You are sweet. Thank you for supporting, i know you are recovering still. Hope you are resting and recovering ok. Big hugs sent to you too. Xxx💕

jess1981
jess1981
in reply to cryst4l

Thank you. 🙂And back at you 🤗💝💝💝 xoxo

So sorry you are going through such a sad and painful time if your pain is not managed with pain meds and is getting worse I would request advice from GP or EPU just to make sure there is no complication hope you feel better soon x

I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. It’s truly heartbreaking. The physical side of it is really hard, then there’s the emotional pain. I’d keep in close contact with your doctor, or EPAU, and anything at all you’re concerned about, i’d give them a call. I think miscarriage progresses in a different way for everyone. I had a lot of bleeding, huge blood clots, and then pain that gradually subsided. But if you are in pain, or feel like your blood loss is very heavy, I would call your doctor. They gave me dihydracodeine, which really helped the pain. After a few days, the pain went but I felt a bit sore for a few weeks. I’m so so sorry that you’re going through this, my thoughts are with you xxx

cryst4l
cryst4l
in reply to Kathryn1984

Thanks Kathryn. I am keeping a close eye. You are right, its both the physical and emotional pain you go through. Noone should have to endure this.xx

I would better check out... i had a missrd misscarriage and i choose d And C for the reason of making sure all was gone, less infection, no pain and my pregnancy signs stopped str8 away.

Hope ur feeling better soon xx

cryst4l
cryst4l
in reply to Mrsplant

Thanks mrsplant. My mum is saying the same, to call the dr, I will see how I am tomorrow and speak to them. Xx

Mrsplant
Mrsplant
in reply to cryst4l

Keep us updated.. xx

Thinking of you my lovely.

Hope you are feeling a little better today? The ladies have shared the advice I would give, I was shocked at the cramps and I went to EPU earlier this week just to get checked, so would recommend that if you are struggling.

It really is harder than I would have imagined, so I feel for you.

Hugs

Suzannah x

Hey Suzannah,thanks lovely, I kept meaning to reply back to you today, sorry. My cramps are just awful each time I pass my bowels and then the pain lingers. But blood has calmed down now. Im thinking maybe go to epu tomorrow, but not sure mine is a walk in. How are you? Did scan show all was clear? Its so so hard isnt it, its something you dont expect to happen to you. Noone should have to go through this.xxx

Don’t worry about not replying, completely understandable!

My cramps were the same, it was when I had bowel movements, they were excruciating. By Tuesday this week it all settled down and I have been feeling better since, hopefully that same will happen for you.

Maybe call the EPU first thing then they will get you on the list for the day? Mine did bloods and HCG is down to 100 and scan showed my lining had thinned and all clear otherwise.

It really is hard, I had no idea what it would be like, totally clueless. I don’t really talk about our fertility issues with people, but I have talked about this, I felt so unprepared for what it involved, I think that is the hardest part xx

So so sorry to read this. Tight hugs!❤️

cryst4l
cryst4l
in reply to Steph254

Thanks Steph xx

I don’t have any advice but I just wanted to say how very sorry I am for your loss. Sending you and your partner lots and lots of love and hugs. Look after each other xxx

cryst4l
cryst4l
in reply to Sarahlou01

Thanks Sarahlou xx

Were u very far gone?? Just seeing if when u past it was around the size it should of been.

Its not easy and remember to always talk about it. You will always be that babies mommy and dont let anyone every tell u different.

I have a tattoo on my chest for our twin we lost at 11weeks.

cryst4l
cryst4l
in reply to Mrsplant

I was 8 weeks at the scan but I missed miscarried a few weeks before that they said, but I had 2 sacs, one with a fetus, one without, I dont know if I passed both or just the one.I feel awful that we are just supposed to deal with this not know if its right or wrong. Only those that go through it may fully understand x

Mrsplant
Mrsplant
in reply to cryst4l

Out twins stopped at around 8weeks 4days. So my body had let me carry ob thinking i was preg 4 3 weeks and i only got scanned becuz i paid 4 it and was told no babies.. the hospital told me that my body wasnt going to let them go and showed no sign of letting me go thru it.. so thats why we bad the D and C.

U may find that u have passed the empty sack and nothing else. Even if u feel better tomoz i personality would go and get checked out.

Really do hope your feeling better soon cuz to feel rough and go thru a lost at the same time is so terrible.

Big hugz and ur lil angel will always be with u.

cryst4l
cryst4l
in reply to Mrsplant

Im sorry for your loss. I will call epu tomorrow and see if I can in to see them. Thank you xx

Mrsplant
Mrsplant
in reply to cryst4l

Its fine.. u learn to become strong. Mine was a pregnancy after a failed IVF xx

I'm so sorry that you're having to go through this, it's so cruel but you're not alone, lots of us have been through it. I had bad stomach cramps and the physical 'passing of matter' was horrendous, I think I was 8 weeks pregnant when it happened. As the other ladies had said painkillers and I used a hot water bottle to help. Take it steady, we watched whole box sets in an attempt to take our minds off it but do what you have to. It's a horrible thing to go through so look after each other xxxx

I am so sorry for your loss..I know the pain you are going through.we chose surgical management so I can't advise. I would call doctor or epu if you are worried though xxxx

So sorry for your loss and that you are going though this terrible time .

I hope the pain is decreasing for you, as I can relate to how awful and scary it is.

i found the early pregnancy unit at hospital really kind and supportive when I have been worried about symptoms.

Sending you lots of love and healing xxx

I know how you feel, dear. I went through m/c myself. It was devastating. I’m ttc but nothing works. I am so angry all the time… And feel so sad. People say ‘let it go’ or ‘it will eventually happen, don’t overthink’. My response to them is if you been TTC as long as we have you'll be devastated too. Everyone deals with grief differently. If you want to cry go ahead and do that. Don't let it bottled up! Let it out because trust me it’ll help. No one knows exactly what you go through. Listen to yourself, but not other people. Only you know how you feel and what you need. No one can tell you there will be other times. Trust me I had to curse a few people out because of their stupid comments like that.

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