2nd round :(: Hey ladies well after my... - Fertility Network UK

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2nd round :(

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B

Hey ladies well after my first very big ivf fail a few weeks ago we have our follow up appointment at the clinic. I'm guessing to discuss what went wrong (15 eggs 14 mature 11 fertilized...no frosties and only 1 average FET) or what else can be done next round...i can't believe I'm going to do this all over again. Any tips on what I should ask? I was angry a couple weeks, angry at my body angry at the clinic think I was just looking g for someone to blame after my BFN. I don't know how some of you warrior woman can do this for years. But yes trying to think of everything I should be asking should I do this all again? Thanks ladies xx

20 Replies

Dear I know it is very difficult. Actually IVF is quite tiring and somewhat risky process. Risky in a way that there is a 50 50 chance that you will succeed or not. But you should not lose hope. When you will visit the clinic, you must ask all the questions that are arising in your mind since the first day of failure. One thing you have to remember always. Life is the name of challenges. Just face the challenges with such a strong power that everyone appreciates you.

Those who keep strong will get something good in future. And those who lose heart remain empty handed.

I myself is considering a clinic for my infertility issue. I am very positive about it. I just hope that everything goes successful for me.

I wish you best of luck. And be brave sweetie.

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to Sara56

Thanks for your reply sara56. Yes I must write down all my questions that keep going round and round in my head. Yes you are right gotta keep on fighting...keep fighting for my dream. This will be our last funded round, I'm just terrified if it doesn't work again, as we do not have the money to fund another round ourselves. Thanks for your encouraging words, I really hope you have your dreams come true too. This road ain't easy xxxx

Sa_Ra profile image
Sa_Ra in reply to Niki_B

Hi I’m in the same boat as you, we had our follow up 2nd Jan and it’s just been delay after delay getting an appointment with my clinic. Our ‘failure’ was unexplained which doesn’t help at all, the only thing they advised me was to remove a small polyp they had spotted before trying again. To be honest with you I’m past caring and have decided there are other things in life to focus on. If it happens it happens if not life goes on. Make a list of everything you want to ask xx

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to Sa_Ra

Hi Sa_Ra yes i have a feeling thry will say the same...unexplained. I mean how can they really know or be 100% anyways? Yes i was in that mindset before my BFN...whats meant to be will be. But now since being through it all i want it even more! It's a hard road but I'll do it one more time. I wish you all the luck and happiness in whatever you do xxx

Sa_Ra profile image
Sa_Ra in reply to Niki_B

All the best niki I’m still going to have my last funded round but won’t put as much pressure on myself this time, there are loads of tips on here you could try but the thing everyone says is RELAX - used to hate hearing that word LOL but it’s true x

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to Sa_Ra

Thanks and all the best to you! Xxx relax? Bahahaha tell my anxiety ridden brain that ;) xx

When I went through my first failed round, Diane gave me some questions - if you message her she can probably email them to you.

We had a similar issue in our round last year. 15 eggs, 10 fertilised only two made it to day 3. After that we got a BFP but it was chemical. Our consultant then advised something was wrong with my partners batch of sperm when in February this year out of 10 eggs; not one fertilised. Sara is right... the chances and odds are always going to play a part. Don’t beat yourself up. This round we had 9 eggs, 6 were looking good and of those 4 very strong. By day three... the other 3 from the 9 which had been discounted had caught up. You couldn’t predict it! xx

Thanks emu2016 but who is Diane? Someone from this site?

Wow very similar to me. But how did your consultant know it was your hubbys sperm? That's what I'm thinking with us as we had to do ICSI cause his sperm count is low and not the best swimmers. Your last round sounds brilliant!! How is that going? And did you have any frosties? Did you or hubby change anything or diet? As yes very different from your first round! I'm just praying this second round is going to work as this is it for us! Xx

Lilli79 profile image
Lilli79 in reply to Niki_B

Hi niki it's DianeArnold she's brilliant and will be happy to help 😊

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to Lilli79

Thanks Lilli79 xx im new to this site so hopefully if you see this DianeArnold can you message me :)

Hi niki we failed ours too first time 1st of may, I took a pregnancy test was positive then two days later after heavily bleeding negative test it’s been awful.. our follow up appointment to come end of May. I had 4 eggs 2 fertilised one put back grade 33?? Stage 6?? I still don’t know how good or bad this is. Then my other egg didn’t make day 5 so no frozen. Not sure what I need to do to change next time and what I did wrong? I hope all goes well for you second time but just wanted to let you know your not alone xxx

Sa_Ra profile image
Sa_Ra in reply to jessleach2018

You did nothing wrong Jess it’s purely luck. Even after doing everything by the book it still hasn’t worked for some. I know it’s hard but we women should be grateful for the other things we do have in our lives x

Thanks so much Jess. It really is such an emotional draining experience. That BFN was more awful than I imagined. Yes well as I said we had 11 fertilize...only 1 blastocyst on day 5 that was a 4b (in New zealand they grade them 1-6....i being the worst 6 being the best a perfect hatching blastocyst) so I'm not sure how they are rated in the UK. apparently 2 of our other embryos made it to blastocyst but they were very poor quality and embryologist said would never be a baby. Was gutted. All those eggs and embryos :( but Yes hun I have so many questions I better start writing them down for our appt Monday. But hun I really think alot of it is like a roll of the dice. It reallynis 50/50 or even less depending on circumstances. But if we don't try again we will never know right? Just gotta be strong and push on. We can do this hun we are stronger than we think! I wish you all the luck and baby dust in the world sweetie xxx

So sorry to hear but like you said we are strong women! Are you staying with the same clinic?

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to Mifkipi

Yes Mifkipi I'm in lil ole new zealand so there is not really many clinics 1 in all the main city's. But yes we are strong...soldier on ;) xxx

Mifkipi profile image
Mifkipi in reply to Niki_B

Sending lots and love and hugs! May the baby god shines on us!!!

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to Mifkipi

Yes may they shine!! It's our turn for our little miracles! Xxxx

❤️❤️❤️ same to you we can do this lovely good luck with everything xx

Niki_B profile image
Niki_B in reply to jessleach2018

You too hun! We got this 💪💪❤

Thank you so much for your reply. It is really tough and I will try again...this will be our last time as this is publicly funded and we cannot afford it on our own. Thank you so much for your encouraging words. I wish you all the best too xxx

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