Why have my periods become regular all of a sudden?!

[alexandra243]

I have pcos and a history of very irregular periods (in the last couple of years I have averaged out at one period per year!) I previously tried fertility treatments (injections worked well, although my cycles were typically very long and needed provera several times inbetween rounds). I also had four miscarriages which were in the early stage and ultimately unexplained by the clinic. Five years of absolute hell left me without good mental health or physical well-being, with a suffering career, a failing marriage, some social anxiety/depression and struggling friendships/relationships with family. I now have two toddlers via adoption and couldn't speak more highly of the route I have taken.

However... in the last three months I have had a sudden return of my menstrual cycle, lasting about 30 days each time. I am wondering if this means I ovulated (pcos means I can't be sure) and also curious as to why I have had to buy sanitary wear for the first time in two years. I have had a few days now of mild period pains and it has made me think about the notion that I might be able to fall pregnant without treatment. I'm not setting out to become pregnant, but old habits die hard. I don't like the grip this thought has had on me this week - I went and took three hpts yesterday because it dawned on me that a lack of a period despite several days of cramps could mean pregnancy (I had very clear implantation bleeding and cramps in all my pregnancies before). I can't think of anything else to be honest. I feel stupid even considering that I could be. All the tests were negative of course. I am also happy with my newly adopted children who I love so very much! A pregnancy would always be a blessing to me, but life right now doesn't easily allow for one. And there i go again! I'm clearly not pregnant, but thinking like i am just because I haven't had the next period my body seems to be gearing up to.

I guess I am just thrown by having periods again after such a long time. I'm wondering why I have had a couple recently, and why the cycles are so short compared to my history. I know it is unlikely I will ever have a pregnancy without help and my recurrent miscarriage problem would surely put a stop to a pregnancy anyway. But why am I getting waves of period pains without a bleed, and can I get used to having a cycle or should I assume it won't stick around?

So confused and affected by a very rapid onset of wishful thinking

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hi alexandra243. perhaps time to ask your GP to check your blood hormones out? Also, with having suffered 4 miscarriages, did you get a referral to a recurrent miscarriage clinic? Ask about that too, if it didn't happen. Good luck! Diane

[alexandra243 in reply to DianeArnold]

Hi Diane, I was sent for recurrent miscarriage blood tests and nothing obvious came out of it. Actually, the consultant backtracked on her original view that IVF would have been a healthier next step after so many rounds on inject-able hormones and three miscarriages, so we ended up going for IUI but just the once. Because this also lead to a miscarriage, we (my husband and I) agreed that we had spent too many years doing treatment and felt we had lost so much of ourselves to it that adoption was the way forward. After I was matched with toddlers (which is fab!) I have just avoided all pcos/treatment related topics with my doctors because I felt I had moved away from it all and was fed up of all the intrusion and heartache.

I'm just curious now as I had sort of assumed I would never see any period related improvements without direct clinic input, but as I've sort of had a sudden reboot in my cycles I am probably doing some wishful thinking in wanting it to continue. Being affected by signs of being due on and it mixing with memories of what it felt like to be in the very early stages of pregnancy, it has taken me back to that really confusing place where every symptom can be explained both ways. Nature is cruel like that. I have taken two tests which are negative, but haven't yet had a bleed despite the period pains (mild, not concerning) lasting a few days so this is prolonging my wishful thinking too. I'll test again in a week if nothing happens, but knowing my luck and my very lacking menstrual cycle I probably didn't even ovulate and just got all the warning signs for it instead. I wish that ovulation predictor kits worked for PCOS ladies but all the advice says don't bother, so I think I will always have that nagging curiosity and a little bit of hope in the back of my mind until I hit the menopause!

By the way, thank you for your response. It is a comfort to know that there are people working to help give people who are struggling with fertility questions some advice and understanding. The world of fertility treatments, ongoing losses and life without the ability many others take for granted is very isolating and certainly has taken me to some very dark places in recent years. Off topic slightly, I hope people who read this who are also struggling to conceive or carry will consider adoption. Not as a last resort, but as a way of taking back control and moving forward. I know it comes with complications and procedures, but our case was a quick-moving one and we were bringing our children home after 9 months of being in the process! It has been a really positive experience so far and I am now mostly plodding along and moaning like the other parents of toddlers out there! Yes I wish I could experience things the natural way, but I wouldn't swap things now because I love my children and do not believe I love them any differently to if I had given birth to them myself.

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK in reply to alexandra243]

Hi alexandra243. What a wonderful story, and thank you so much for replying back and explaining everything you’ve been through and the way you’ve coped, and how you still wonder whether a natural little miracle will still happen. Well, you sound amazing to me, and to hear that finally you are a mother to two youngsters, as I know from others how long and sometimes painful going through the adoption process. I know I don’t know you, but I’m proud of the way you have coped with so much. Wishing you all peace and contentment in your family life. Diane xx